Impact Results – 2/26/09

TNA iMPACT!
Orlando, Florida (iMPACT! Zone @ Universal Studios)
February 26, 2009
Commentators: Mike Tenay & Don West
Report by: Josh Boutwell of WrestleView.com

We get a recap of last week as the show opens and then it’s time to cross the line!

Earlier today Mike Tenay and Don West talking in the empty Impact Zone about last week’s record breaking show. The opening video hits and then Mike & Don talk about what’s in store for tonight.

Knockouts Tag Team Match
The Beautiful People w/Kip James vs. Madison Rayne & Taylor Wilde

Man, Velvet & Angelina are definitely God’s gift to men, wow. Madison and Angelina will start the match off and they lockup with Angelina forcing Rayne into the corner. Angelina swings at Madison but she ducks and starts throwing repeated forearms at Angelina! Angelina quickly puts Madison in a side headlock but Madison pushes her off and Angelina comes back with shoulder block. Angelina comes off the ropes but Madison hits her with a hiptoss and then a kick. Rayne tags in Taylor and they whip Angelina into the ropes and follow up with a double toe hold. Taylor then hits an Elbow for an early nearfall. Angelina then tags out to Velvet and she eats a suplex by Taylor. Taylor then hits the La Magistral Cradle on Sky for another nearfall! Beautiful arm drag by Taylor transitioned right into an armbar. Taylor tags in Rayne and she hits an axe handle off the middle rope on Velvet. Taylor goes to ringside to argue with Kip James as Madison has Velvet in a wristlock. Madison reaches for a tag but Taylor isn?t there and Velvet hits her with a forearm. Velvet & Angelina double team Madison in the corner while Taylor argues with Kip. Velvet chokes Madison in the corner and then slams her for a two count. Velvet throws several punches and then chokes Madison before tagging Angelina back in. They then hit the Holler Double Elbow on Madison. Angelina repeatedly slams Madison’s head against the mat and then slams her head first into the top turnbuckle and tags Velvet back in. Velvet chokes Madison and then throws her across the ring and chokes her again. Angelina tagged back in and she puts the boots to Madison and then puts her in a Sleeper. Madison comes back with a nice jawbreaker and then tags in Taylor as Angelina tags in Velvet. Taylor quickly with a running clothesline on Velvet and then a back heel kick and a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker on Angelina! Taylor whips Velvet into the ropes and goes for a back slam but eats Velvet’s boot instead. Angelina then clotheslines Taylor and the Beautiful People put the boots to her. Madison runs in and throws Velvet off of Taylor and then throws Angelina off. Madison helps Taylor up and then slaps the taste out of Taylor’s mouth! Madison then walks out of the ring leaving Taylor shocked in the ring and then Velvet comes in and hits Taylor with the Beauty Mark (Backstabber) for the pin!

Winners: Beautiful People via pinfall (Beauty Mark)

Earlier today the Main Event Mafia arrive in a stretch Hummer and JB asks Kurt if Sting accepted his challenge for Destination X but Kurt just ignores him and walks past.

—COMMERCIAL BREAK—

In the MEM locker room JB is asking Kurt about everything with Sting and JB says the fans have a right to know if Sting has accepted his challenge yet, but Kurt says the fans don?t have a right to know and MEM business is MEM business. Kurt says that they have a statement and it will be made at the top of the hour. Two cops then walk into the locker room and Steiner bursts out with ‘she was 19, she told me she was 19!? but the cops ask for a Mr. Huffman (Booker T.). Booker says it’s him and Kurt mocks Book’s name and Steiner asks if he’s a financial adviser or something. Booker says he?ll talk to the cops outside. Kurt and Scott continue to mock Book’s name as he leaves.

TNA World Tag Team Championships
Off The Wagon Challenge (if Beer Money wins whoever they pin is fired)
Beer Money Inc. (c) w/Jacqueline vs. Rock-n-Rave Infection

This is the first time either Lance Rock or Jimmy Rave have been on TV in quite awhile and if you follow wrestling news at all you know how this one is going to end. Jimmy and James will start the match off. They lockup and James quickly puts Rave in a side headlock but Jimmy pushes him off and eats a shoulder block by Storm. Jimmy comes back with a shoulder block of his own and then a tilt-a-whirl into a facebuster! James tags in Roode but he eats a knee lift as he comes charging in and then Lance Rock runs in and they whip Roode into the ropes and hit a double back elbow followed by a double elbow! Storm goes for a running clothesline on Rock & Rave but they duck and then Rock lifts Storm straight up into a hot shot into a Gutbuster over Rave’s knee! Rave puts the boots to Roode in the corner as Rock drags Storm back in the ring. Storm comes back with an Enziguri on Rock but then eats a Shinning Wizard by Rave! Roode catches Rave with a Spinebuster as he turns around and then puts the boots to him. He tags in Storm and then puts the boots to Rave. Storm snapmares Rave over and locks in a headlock on him. Rave fights to his feet and comes off the ropes only to get press slammed onto the top rope and then clotheslined. Storm tags Roode back in and they whip Rave into the ropes, Roode with a Scoop Slam, Storm hits the elbow, and then Roode hits the knee for a nearfall before Rock breaks it up. Storm whips Rave into the ropes but Rave floats over Storm and then hits an STO! Storm tags in Roode and Rave tags in Rock. Rock with right hands for Beer Money and then a Big Boot on Roode and a Chokeslam on Storm! Roode goes for a clothesline but Rock catches him by the throat and hits a Chokeslam into a Backbreaker for a nearfall before Storm breaks it up. Rave throws Storm to the floor and follows him out while Roode comes back with a knee to the gut on Rock. Roode goes for the Payoff but Rock counters into the Blackout! Rock covers Roode but Jacky distracts the referee! Rave is pissed and tries to get the referee to look back and Storm hits Rock with the title belt and then grabs a hold of Rave as the referee turns around. 1?2?3 and Lance Rock is fired!

Winners & STILL Tag Champs: Beer Money via pinfall

A video package hyping up the Ultimate X is shown. Earlier today Sting pulls up in a banging yellow convertible and he is wearing the MEM track suit and ignores JB as they show an unfocused image of someone standing in the background. I couldn?t tell who it was exactly but it looked like AJ.

—COMMERCIAL BREAK—

In the back JB is in Booker’s locker room with him and the police. The cop asks where he got the police tape and Booker tells them not to touch anything. Booker is still complaining about AJ stealing his title belt. Booker is mad about AJ knocking over a picture of him and Muhammad Ali and he says AJ is ?armed and dangerous? and they need to get him off the streets.

Mike and Don go over the history with AJ and Booker and Don hypes up live events and Lockdown coming in April.

We get to see another therapy session between Abyss and Dr. Stevie. Abyss talks about knowing he shouldn?t cut himself but he just loves it and it reminds him of Christmas morning opening up the final present. Abyss talks about loving the Jonas Brothers and he asks Dr. Stevie if he thought he could be a teen idol. Abyss asks if he would have to lose the mask and Dr. Stevie they will meet at the same time next week. Wow, that was just retarded and made Abyss come off like a freaking pedophile.

—COMMERCIAL BREAK—

TNA shows a graphic thanking the fans for making last week the highest rated show in TNA history and then hype up the ?One Night with ODB? contest.

Booker is in the parking lot still begging the cops to lock AJ up and they say they?ll do it but they get a call and they have to leave. Everytime I talk to a cop like that I end up behind bars. All of a sudden AJ shows up behind Booker and he lays him out again! MEM security grabs AJ and Booker finally gets some shots in on AJ until more security runs up and breaks them up.

—COMMERCIAL BREAK—

In the back Lauren is with Scott Steiner (who looks like an oversized Eminem with his hat cocked to the back and wearing that baggy tracksuit) and she asks Steiner what’s going down with the MEM, but Steiner says that she’s going down later on. Steiner says he would?ve helped Booker out but he was taking a dump and speaking of dumps ?the biggest piece of sh*t of them all?, Samoa Joe has been jumping out and attacking Steiner. Steiner says he could put a plate of doughnuts down in a room and wait until he gorges himself to death before he attacks him but he’s the Main Event Mafia, that’s not how they do things. Steiner tells Lauren to go find Joe and tell him that he’s going to kick his ass. As Lauren starts to walk out Joe storms in the room puts a big blade up to Steiner’s throat and Joe says that it’s much easier for Joe to find him and he can do it any place and anywhere. Joe says that Steiner will try to scream and nothing will come out and that’s the sound of torture, and Steiner will know what that sound is when he’s done with him. Joe leaves and Steiner (with a hilarious look on his face) looks at the camera and says ?that was a knife?!?

Don West looks kind of pissed off and has looked like that all night. JB is in the back with Jeff Jarrett and Jeff says that when you have a bunch of egomaniacs that problems are bound to happen. Jeff says that wrestling is a solo sport and no team remains together forever. Jeff says that the band will be breaking up and it will be business back to usual. That’s three consecutive segments without any matches, come on now.

—COMMERCIAL BREAK—

Mick Foley’s Hardcore History 101

Mick says he’s always asked what his greatest match was and he says for many years it was the 1996 match with Shawn Michaels at ?In Your House: Mind Games?, but in 2004 that answer changed when he had a Hardcore Match with Randy Orton and they nearly killed each other. He takes pride in leaving it all out there and putting Orton over in the process and talks about throwing up after the match due to a concussion.

In the middle of the ring Mike Tenay calls out MEM and says it’s time for answers. The Mafia comes out including Sting. Everybody is wearing the MEM track suits except Kurt who is wearing a business suit. Tenay talks about the hostility and brutality that Sting and Angle have shown towards each and talks about the challenge put forth last week by Kurt. Tenay asks point blank if Kurt vs. Sting for the Title is on. Steiner and Nash talk with Kurt while Booker talks with Sting. Nash grabs a microphone and says tonight he has been deemed spokesman for the Mafia. Nash says that when they got together they knew it wouldn?t be easy and that they had a week to patch up their differences and they are a family. Tenay questions Nash’s answer and Nash gets pissed at Tenay and asks who he works for. Tenay says he works for TNA but Nash says he works for Jeff Jarrett and Mick Foley and all he’s trying to do is stir up the pot. Nash says that Jarrett used Sting and Kurt to get a rating and he says they don?t work for them. Nash says that together they are stronger than anything including the front office. Nash is getting tons of heat. Nash tells Kurt and Sting that they don?t have to love each other but they need to respect the Mafia. Jarrett’s music hits and he power walks to the ring. Jeff says that knowing Sting for the past 20 years like he does he sees that Sting isn?t buying the Mafia’s ?crap? for a minute. Jeff talks about Sting saying he stands on a platform of respect and dignity and tradition and asks where the integrity is when one of his ?brothers? spits in his face. Jeff says that same brother is supposed to be standing on that same platform of respect that Sting is on. Jeff says Kurt Angle and Sting are polar opposites and there is only one thing to do and that’s to let them fight. The fans then start chanting ?let them fight? and Jeff says that he is granting Kurt the Title shot for Destination X! Booker is pissed and he says he wants to know who died and made Jeff the law in TNA. Booker says he doesn?t care that Jeff is the founder of TNA and he wants to know exactly what Jeff founded, a company full of nobodies until they came to TNA. Booker says rumor has it that Jeff started the company out of a flea market and painted the building himself. Booker says that without the Mafia there is no TNA and he never liked Jeff and if he doesn?t leave then he’s going to kick his ass. Jeff says Booker ain?t going to do a damn thing and that he doesn?t need a badge to kick Book’s ass all around the ring. Jeff says that he did paint the Asylum in Nashville and says to look at TNA and that it’s his house. Jeff says the match is on and it’s final and they are going to have the contract signing tonight!

—COMMERCIAL BREAK—

Mike and Don go over what we just saw and Don still looks, I don?t know, like he doesn?t want to be there. Don then says out of nowhere that while Mike is in ?ass kissing mode? he should just kiss Sting’s as well. Don tells Mike to go in the back and tell Sting to pull his pants down and plant one on it. Wow, what in the hell is this? Tenay is as surprised as I am and West says that Tenay knows exactly what this is about. West says he?ll educate everyone and he grabs a microphone. Don says that he and Tenay have been best friends for about 7 years and they have called every single match in TNA’s history and talks about how their wives are best friends, but a few days TNA’s management held meetings and one of those meetings was about West’s future and Tenay was at that meeting. He says that he has been told that Tenay had nothing to say on his behalf and he says that the fans put Tenay on a pedestal but he found out about Tenay and he is nothing but a selfish prick and he doesn?t have any balls. West says he doesn?t know what his future holds but he knows 2 things: their friendship will never be the same and he can take that microphone and shove it up his ass. What the hell?! Wow, talk about a swerve straight out of left field.

—COMMERCIAL BREAK—

In the back Lauren is watching the Kontourage argue and then Tenay says he has no clue what in the hell Don West was talking about and they review West going nuts.

Knockouts Tag Team Match
Sojournor Bolt & Rhaka Khan vs. Awesome Kong & Riasha Saeed

Sojo has a microphone with her and she says she told Raisha Saeed last week she wasn?t her mother and she couldn?t tell her what to do and Kong may look like she ate her mother but she’s not her mother either. Rhaka then takes the mic and says that they know Kong and Raisha have been scheming on them and screams for Kong and Raisha to come fight them now! Raisha and Sojo start the match off and scrap right in the beginning! Raisha with a shoulder block on Sojo and then Sojo puts her in a side headlock. Raisha pushes Sojo off and goes for a clothesline but she ducks and hits a Thesz Press! Sojo throws several rights and lefts and then puts her in a wristlock and tags in Khan who hits an axe handle and puts her in a wristlock. Khan whips Raisha into the ropes and then leapfrogs her and hits a hiptoss followed by a Split Leg. Rhaka attempts to whip Raisha into the ropes but she reverses it sending Khan into Kong and then Raisha nails her with a clothesline. Kong and Raisha double team Khan and choke her on the ropes and Kong in now (without a tag). Kong with a big chop and then she whips Khan into the opposite corner and hits a nasty running Splash. Raisha tags back in and chops her and then hits her with a forearm. Khan goes for a Hook Kick but Raisha ducks and hits a clothesline for a nearfall. Raisha pie faces Sojo and then Kong wheel barrow slams Raisha onto Khan for another nearfall. Kong tags back in and hits her with a scoop slam and tags Raisha back in as Khan tags Sojo back in! sojo with repeated slaps and a jawbreaker followed by another jawbreaker for a two count. Sojo goes for a Powerbomb but Raisha counters and Kong comes in only to have Sojo jump on her! Raisha pulls Sojo off and Rhaka attacks Raisha. Khan with a big back elbow in the corner while Sojo takes on Raisha. Khan and Sojo try to whip Kong and Raisha into each other but Kong reverses Khan sending her crashing into Raisha. Kong then picks Khana up and throws her over the top rope to the floor. On the outside Kong misses a clothesline and hits the ring post. Back in the ring Sojo goes for a Powerbomb again but Raisha blocks it again only eat a Superkick by Sojo. Sojo then backslides Raisha and gets the pin!

Winners: Sojo & Rhaka Khan via pinfall (backslide)

After the match Kong attacks Sojo and Khan and she Awesome Bombs Sojo on top of Khan.

—COMMERCIAL BREAK—

TNA Rough Cut: Ultimate X

The X-Division guys talk about whether or not their scared of heights (which I am deathly afraid of) and Alex says he’s terrified of heights. Hernandez says he was afraid of heights but after a couple of Ultimate X matches that fear went away while AJ says that you can?t think about any fears going into that match. Sabin talks about the first Ultimate X Match and how when they first set it up they put the poles for the cables on ring they had them connected to the ring post and Frankie Kazarian jumped up on them to see how they would hang and all 4 poles bent inwards. He says that they didn?t think about using the scaffolding for the lights until about 10 minutes before the show went live. Chris says that they were completely unprepared for the first match and AJ says that he prepared for his first one by watching tapes of the others. Shelley says that he knew if he thought about it before going into it that he would mess up. That was a great segment.

They show a video hyping up the Ultimate X with the Destination X theme song performed by Hoobastank (who they are? I have no clue). Minus the horrible music it was a good little hype video.

TNA X-Division Championship
Ladder Match
Alex Shelley (c) vs. Consequences Creed vs. ?Black Machismo? Jay Lethal vs. Chris Sabin

They show a quick recap of the history between the Lethal Consequences vs. MCMG feud but tonight it’s all about the X-Division Title. They pair off with Creed going at Sabin and Lethal going at Shelley. Creed and Lethal whip the Guns into each other but they catch each others arms and spin themselves around into clothesline attempts on Creed and Lethal, but they duck and go for running clotheslines of their own. The Guns duck and hit crossing Running Clotheslines in the corners following by crossing Running Back Elbows in the corners! The Guns whip Creed into the ropes and hit double back elbows on him followed Backsplash Senton (by Sabin) and Knee (by Shelley) at the same time. Tenay points out that everyone in this match is a current or former X-Division Champion except Creed. The Guns kick Lethal to his knees and then nail him with double martial arts kicks to the back and chest. Sabin points at the ladder and he goes out to get it. in the ring Shelley hits a back kick on Lethal and goes for the Shell Shock but Lethal counters it into a sunset flip but Shelley blocks it and out of nowhere Creed nails him with a Neckbreaker! Creed quickly slides to the outside and goes after Sabin with Lethal in toe. Lethal and Creed toss Sabin back into the ring and then they both grab a ladder but they each eat them as the Guns hit baseball slides sending the ladders into their faces!

—COMMERCIAL BREAK—

We are back and Lethal hits Sabin with an elbow and then comes off the ropes but eats a running knee by Sabin. Sabin hangs Lethal’s legs on the top rope and then hits him with a Roll of the Dice onto a ladder! Oh damn! Shelley slides another ladder into the ring as Creed knocks him down. In the ring Sabin sets up the ladder and climbs it until Creed cuts him off and then hits him with the ladder! Creed sets up the ladder between the turnbuckles and the other ladder like a bridge. Creed then hits Sabin with repeated right hands laying him out of over the ladder and goes to the apron possibly for that springboard leg, but Shelley yanks him off slamming Creed’s head into the apron. Shelley climbs in the ring and pushes Sabin off the ladder and then eats a right hand by Creed. Creed then hits a Springboard Bulldog sending Shelley’s head into the ladder. Creed actually cleared that ladder when he did that, damn. Sabin catches Creed with a spinning back kick and then press slams Creed onto the ladder! Sabin then tosses Creed to the floor and climbs the ladder again. Lethal comes up and knocks Sabin back onto the ladder set up as a bridge again. Lethal gets up there with him and hits him with an STO onto the ladder! Lethal knocks that bridging ladder down and starts climbing up the other ladder and actually touches the belt before Shelley cuts him off. Shelley climbs up the ladder with Lethal and hits a Jawbreaker off the damn ladder! Shelley hits the Sliced Bread, running up the ladder instead of the turnbuckles like he usually does, on Lethal! Shelley starts climbing up the ladder and pulls the belt down to win the match.

Winner & STILL X-Division Champ: Alex Shelley

After the match Suicide swings down out of nowhere and slams into the ladder which Shelley had to dive off of to not get killed. Suicide with a big kick on Sabin and then a headbutt to Lethal and a beautiful press slam into a Powerbomb on Creed! Suicide then grabs Lethal and slams Lethal headfirst into the middle rope and then Suicide and Shelley pretend their in a martial arts movie blocking each others chops and kicks until Suicide hits a crazy move where he put Shelley’s leg over his head and then slammed him facefirst backwards. Suicide picks up the X-Division Title and stares at it before laying it over Shelley and celebrating over him. The lights go out and when they come back on Suicide is gone.

In the back Jeff Jarrett is walking towards the ring guitar in hand while Kurt and Sting are also walking toward the ring.

—COMMERCIAL BREAK—

TNA World Heavyweight Title Contract Signing

Nash grabs the microphone and he says the match isn?t going to happen. Jeff asks Kurt who the boss in MEM is because it doesn?t seem that way. Jeff says in all the gangster movies he’s seen the thugs usually stand behind the Godfather and he asks isn?t Kurt supposed to be like Tony Soprano or Al Pacino or Robert DeNiro or Marlin Brando, but the way he sees it there is a big difference between those godfathers and Kurt. He says they had balls and Kurt doesn?t. Kurt is pissed off as the fans start chanting ?no balls? at Kurt and Kurt grabs the contract and signs it. Kurt offers a hand shake to Kurt but Kurt hits him over the head with the clipboard and then nails him with the Olympic Slam! Mick Foley runs out and the Mafia back off and act like they didn?t do anything. Foley checks on Jarrett but Kurt attacks him and puts Foley in the Ankle Lock! Sting then comes out with the bat and hits Kurt in the leg with it! Sting lays Kurt out with the bat as the Mafia look on in shock! Sting helps Jeff up and then helps Mick up and then signs the contract! Sting hits the contract on Kurt Angle’s lifeless body and stares down at the rest of the Mafia before saying something to Booker and leaving as we go to black.


Final Thoughts

Tonight was, I guess the best word would be weird, and it was like that all night. The show started off EXTREMELY slow (in terms of being good or not) but did pick up in the second hour. TNA has always had this problem with trying to stick as much as possible in a 2 hour show (considering they only have one show a week to hype a PPV it’s understandable at times) but tonight it was like the show took a hit of crack before going on air. They had way too many segments back to back to back to back and at one point I think there was like 5 or 6 back-to-back segments with no matches. Not good for a wrestling show at all.

The opening match between the Beautiful People against Taylor & Madison was really good and the swerve with Madison was unexpected and she would be perfect in the Beautiful People. I like where they?re going with it and thank God there was no Sarah Palin mention tonight.

The match between Beer Money & Rock & Rave was decent but short. TNA is doing a great job in making these guys that are done with the company look good as they?re going out (instead of burying them like other companies) but come on, can?t the Tag Champs at least beat a team that hasn?t even teamed together much in the last several months clean? That said they are building Beer Money up big time with this ending careers thing they?re doing.

This Abyss and Dr. Stevie stuff is just dumb, just move on to what you?re planning with Stevie and Abyss and stop doing these stupid skits. I thought the point of this whole thing was to build Abyss back up as a monster not make him look even goofier.

Joe has looked really strong leading into tonight but he came off as looking like a goof running up on Steiner with a toy knife. That was just dumb. Stop it. Just have Joe come out and beat the hell out of Steiner already.

Mick Foley’s little segment is interesting and fun but it’s something they should do as an online thing or something because the last thing you want to be doing is naming the competition (and actually putting over 2 of their biggest stars in the process) on your only weekly show.

The segment with the Mafia, Jarrett, and Tenay was nicely done but the biggest story of it all to me was the Don West shocker at the end. It came absolutely out of nowhere and is def. very interesting. I want to see what they are going to do. Don West played his part really well selling this thing and the fans actually got behind him (though he was supposed to be the heel). I really hope this brings back the heel wrestling persona in wrestling. That is something wrestling has been lacking for quite some time. Come on, you know you?re favorite announcing times was when Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler would go back and forth with each other or when Gorilla and Heenan would do so. This would be a breath of fresh air in the announce booth for TNA.

The 2nd Knockouts Tag Match was a complete mess. Rhaka botched tons of stuff and her timing was way off. She is very athletic and has some nice offensive moves but she really needs more training because all 3 of the other girls in the match (along with all the other Knockouts in the division) outclass her by so much.

I love these rough cut segments and they are hyping up the Ultimate X to be something special which it should be.

The Ladder Match was very fun and had some great spots but it was a bit disappointing in that it just wasn?t given enough time. It got about 10 minutes but there was a commercial break in the middle of that. Should?ve cut off some of these dumb segments and added a few more minutes to the match. So Suicide starts as ?captain save-a-ho? to taking everybody out? Actually I like that much better and should?ve been how it was since the start. I guess Suicide is most likely going to be apart of Ultimate X which I?m not mad at.

The final segment was nicely done and I like that they put over it as a big deal and everybody played their part perfectly. The crowd was hot the whole time.

This show in overall was a jumbled up mess that just jumped all over the place.

Match of the Night: X-Division Ladder Match (**1/2)

Segment/Promo of the Night: The Contract Signing

Final Grade: D +

Scheduled For Next Week:

– TNA World Tag Titles Off The Wagon Challenge: Beer Money Inc. (c) vs. L.A.X.
– X-Division Title: Alex Shelley (c) vs. Kiyoshi
– Fatal Four Way Knockouts Tag: The Beautiful People vs. Rhaka Khan & Sojo Bolt vs. Taylor Wilde & Roxxi vs. Awesome Kong & Raisha Saeed
– Matt Morgan vs. Shane Sewell

Destination X Lineup So Far:

– TNA World Title: Sting (c) vs. Kurt Angle
– Ultimate X: TBA
– TNA Legends Title: Booker T. (c) vs. AJ Styles
– Samoa Joe vs. Scott Steiner

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