Reported by Mike Siciliano of WrestleView.com
On Sunday, April 30, 2006 at 4:14 PM EST

Unfortunately, time is short. So, to keep tradition alive, let me make very quick picks for Backlash tonight on pay per view.

RIC FLAIR vs. UMAGA

Personally, I think Umaga is just a tool for Armando Alejandro Estrada to break in to WWE. He is going to be a star in the making in the future. However, Umaga is just another attempt at a Samoan Wrecking Machine, and quite frankly, the only one I respect is in Ring of Honor and TNA Wrestling. It's sad, however, that the 16 time World champion is going to probably lose this match and job to this wreck of a gimmick that the former Jamal of 3 Minute Warning is portraying. Sad how Flair's status has fallen to the depths of obscurity since his IC title reign.

WINNER: Umaga

For the Women's Championship
MICKIE JAMES vs. TRISH STRATUS

At least they were smart when they picked Stratus' successor as Women's champion. Outside of Victoria, James is the only legitimate wrestler in the entire diva roster. Lita, I doubt, will ever wrestle again with this gimmick she's dealing with full time. So, be that as it may, this feud has gone one show too long. I know Stratus has the rematch, and so be it, but isn't it time to spend some valued time developing some new talent in the women's division. I can think of one woman down in OVW that would be ready and able to compete with James mano y mano for the title. For now, it would shock me if they put the title back on Stratus so quickly. James wins in a lackluster affair.

WINNER: Mickie James

CARLITO vs. CHRIS MASTERS

Who's the face and who's the heel here? Two young studs after WWE ruined another potentially good tag team. I've met both of these individuals, and they are both up and coming talents. Who garners more steam with a pay per view win? That's pretty much what it boils down to here. Who has more to gain in his singles career with a victory here? Truth be told, they both do. I think Carlito will figure out a way to outsmart Masters, keeping Lawler's self titled "meathead' gimmick in check.

WINNER: Carlito

KANE vs. BIG SHOW

Another classic example of how the WWE ruined a dominant tag team. While I can relate to the need to promote "See No Evil", should it be done at the expense of the Raw tag team division? Big Show probably comes in to this with a handicap after his "eye" injury this past monday night, and the new found rejuvenated monster that is Kane will definitely take that to its fullest advantage. Kane wins.

WINNER: Kane

WINNER TAKE ALL: IC title & Money in the Bank clause
ROB VAN DAM vs. SHELTON BENJAMIN

1st, I hate Shelton as a heel. He sucks as a heel. He is not "hated", he is just disrespected because of his lack of mike skills. 2nd, this one is too damn obvious. With ECW on the horizon, and the possibility of having Van Dam in the main event, how stupid would WWE be to take the MitB clause out of Van Dam's hands?

Ridiculously stupid.

Expect this to be a title change for Van Dam, or some form of no contest here and both men keep their stuff. Personally, I wouldn't mind seeing Van Dam hold the IC strap, at least, he'll defend it regularly. And that's coming from a Shelton Benjamin fan that I am. I'll give Van Dam the win, but don't be surprised about some dumb finish.

WINNER: Rob Van Dam

The MCMAHONS vs. SHAWN MICHAELS & _________________

First, I refuse to acknowledge this as a tag team match. It's a handicap match. This gimmick, this feud, this whole thing is abyssmal, disgusting, revolting, repugnant, and every other pitifully lame adverb you can think of, and I AM THE FURTHEST THING FROM A RELIGIOUS MAN YOU CAN FIND.

Now, don't get me wrong, I have zero feelings against theology in any way, shape, or form, but this, this is just plain offensive in every sense of the word.

Now, be that as it may, it's obvious how this feud has been going. The McMahons win the small wars, and HBK figures out a way to take the big stage. This is the big stage. Expect a Michaels win. Hopefully, everybody moves on after this one, but frankly, I doubt it.

WINNER: Shawn Michaels

WWE Championship
JOHN CENA vs. EDGE vs. TRIPLE H

Should be a good triple threat match. I hate the fact that Cena has been getting a bum rap. I think he's developing well. Edge continues to disgust me, no matter how talented he is, and he is talented, but he is the heel that Shelton Benjamin will never be. Edge is hated, Shelton is disrespected. Hope you can see where I am going with that. Triple H appears to be re-verting back to his roots as he returned from the quad. The wise-ass, kick-ass, take no prisoners, fight my own battles superstar that from my perspective, I can't get enough of. Oh, one side note, let's stay with one theme song, boys. Disturbed's song is great. So is Motorhead's, but come on, one's enough.

Anyway, All points lead to a title change, and it wouldn't surprise me one bit. It would piss me off to no end if Edge wins. If Triple H wins, I can relate to that, because it could be a tie in to the ECW PPV coming up soon with RVD. I am going to pick Cena, but this one, like Wrestlemania, is not dripping with confidence. I hope he wins, but I can't say I'm supremely confident.

WINNER: John Cena

I'll come back next time with my next countdown en route to 100. I'll give you two for the price of one next column. How about singles and tag teams, top 20 favorites of all time for me. Sounds good.

Plug time.

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Beaucoup cenabling! I'm off to bed. See ya in the wee hours of the morning.