Impact Results – 3/22/12


TNA Impact Wrestling
Orlando, Florida (Impact Zone)
March 22, 2012
Commentators: Mike Tenay & Taz
Report by: Josh Boutwell of Wrestleview.com

Fresh off the heels of this past Sunday’s Victory Road PPV, Impact Wrestling opens up tonight with clips of the Roode-Sting match at the PPV and Roode’s actions afterward. Roode spits into the camera and says there is not a damn thing anyone can do about what he did.

The footage of Roode manhandling Dixie after the match with Sting is shown. At one point Roode duct taped Sting to the turnbuckles and threatened to blast Sting with a steel chair as Dixie Carter attempted to cover Sting up from the shot. Roode then shoved her to the ground and started screaming at her while rubbing the paint off of Sting’s face and then onto Dixie’s face while screaming at her. They don’t actually show the video of that part, but instead just pictures to try and make it seem more violent.

Dixie Carter is shown arriving to the arena and Tenay says we will hear from Dixie Carter right now.

The Impact Wrestling intro hits and then TNA President Dixie Carter makes her way down to the ring. Dixie says that over the past 6 months Bobby Roode has disrespected TNA more and more each week. She says he has disrespected the fans as a “fire Bobby” chant starts up. She says what he did at Victory Road has disgraced TNA and all she has done all week is talk to attorneys all week to try and make the right decision here. She says there is only one decision she can make and he is the one that has caused this but before she can say anything else Sting’s music interrupts her.

Sting makes his way down to the ring and Dixie hugs him as he gets in the ring. Sting says he has never given her a reason not to trust him but as much as he wants to agree with her that firing Bobby Roode is the answer, but doing that is letting him get off the easy way. He says that if she fires Bobby Roode then they don’t get the right kind of revenge and Storm doesn’t get the right kind of revenge at Lockdown. He also says the fans don’t get the right kind of revenge by firing him. The fans chant “we want revenge” and Sting screams that they have to get the right kind of revenge. He says that to be honest the GM position just isn’t working for him right now and the fans chant “please don’t go.”

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Back from the break Sting and Dixie are still in the ring and Sting tells her that she put all her trust and faith in him to run the company, and he did the very best that he could but he knows something happened at Victory Road. He says TNA came alive at Victory Road and HE came alive and he realized that he cannot be a part-time GM and a part-time wrestler. The fans chant “you still got it” and he says he realized that he can’t be part-time if he’s going to be at Roode’s level. He says he suffered a concussion because he was only half in and he now he has to go home and heal and get better and that’s what he’s going to do. He says he’s going to get stronger and he’s going to come back better than he’s ever been and he’s going to put his boots on and he’s going to fight. He says he will be 100% nothing else but a wrestler. He says he’ll continue to fight for Dixie and TNA but he’ll be fighting at a different compactly but right now he has to step down as TNA GM. He says he won’t leave Dixie or the fans hanging because he’s been talking to the right person for the job. He says he knows someone that can take this company all the way to the top, someone that can read every personality that comes into this place. He says this person can devote 100% of their time to being the GM and he asks Dixie if he can take the TNA keys and hand them over to Hulk Hogan! He tells Dixie to trust him as the fans chant for Hogan.

Tenay & Taz talk about the card for tonight which includes Tag Team Titles, KO Tag Titles, and the X-Division Title all on the line!

In the back Bully Ray says he’s “super freakin’ pissed” and he won’t hold the show hostage but instead he’ll take hostages. He says he’s taking hostages out and he doesn’t care who it is. He wraps a chain around his fist and says tonight is not the night to be standing in his way.

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TNA X-Division Championship
Fatal 4-Way Match
“A-Double” Austin Aries (c) vs. Zema Ion vs. Tony Nese vs. Kid Kash

Aries was able to retain his belt against Zema in their highly competitive match. Now he has to defend it against Zema & 3 others! Aries talks trash to all 3 of his opponents and as he turns to talk trash to Nese, Zema quickly rolls him up for a nearfall. Aries then slaps Zema in the face and Zema rolls out to the floor. Aries follows him out as Kash nails Nese with a nasty chop and then a Lariat! Kash kicks Nese and then hits him with a Suplex for a nearfall. Kash whips Nese into the corner and then charges at him but Nese gets his boots up and then quickly springs to the top and dives off with a Flying Cross Body Block! Kash simply backs away and Nese catches nothing but air. Kash then whips Nese into the ropes and charges at him but Nese holds onto the ropes and then backdrops Kash over the top to the floor! Aries hits a Shoulderblock from the apron on Nese and then chops away at Nese in the corner as he comes back in. Aries attempts to whip Nese into the opposite corner but Nese counters it only to have Aries counter his counter and toss Nese into the corner! Aries follows up with a Running Forearm Smash and then he goes for the IED in the corner but Nese catches him in midair with a boot. Nese follows up with a Running Hip Attack and then a Running Knee to the face of Aries in the corner! Nese covers Aries, 1…2…NO Zema breaks it up! Zema tosses Nese out to the floor and then grabs Aries and then goes for a Back Suplex but Aries blocks it and then sets up for the Brainbuster. Nese dives off the top rope but Aries catches him in midair and drops Zema & Nese with a DDT/Flatliner combo! He covers Nese, 1…2…NO Nese kicks out! Aries clotheslines Nese over the top rope to the floor and then hits the Heat Seeking Missile through the ropes onto Nese on the floor sending him into the guardrail! Kash springs to the top rope and dives off the top with a Plancha onto Aries on the floor! Zema climbs up on the apron and then hits an Asai Moonsault off the turnbuckles onto both Aries & Kash on the floor! Nese is back in the ring and he hits a crazy kind of Reverse Somersault Plancha (much like AJ’s Fosbury Flop) over the top onto EVERYBODY on the floor! After several highlights Nese has Zema dragged back into the ring and is up on the top rope. Kash crotches Nese on the top with a Leaping Enziguri and then climbs up with him! Kash sets up for a Superplex but Zema climbs up with them and then Aries runs over and Powerbombs them all off the top with the TOWER OF DOOM! All 4 men are down as Bully Ray runs out and attacks the X-Division stars!

Winner: NO CONTEST (Aries retains)

Ray hits a Rock Bottom on Nese after laying out both Kash & Zema. Aries asks Ray what the hell he’s doing and then Ray acts like he’s sorry before kicking Aries in the face! Ray grabs a microphone and asks the fans if they know who he is and then says “I’m Bully Ray” before dropping the mic and looking down at the damage he just caused.

Mexican America run into the parking lot as the dude from Repo Games, Josh Lewis, is repoing their car. They agree to play the game and question #1 is what year did Mexico become independent from Spain and Anarquia answers 1821 which is correct. #2 is “was the Chimichanga created in Mexico or the United States?” Anarquia says it’s from Mexico but that one is incorrect. Anarquia calls him a cheater and the final question is to correctly spell Guadalajara. Hernandez tells him to sound it but Anarquia obviously butchers it. Anarquia says they all 4 have title shots and says they’ll pay him the money they owe after they win their titles. He agrees and they leave.

————————————COMMERCIAL BREAK——————————————–

TNA Knockouts Tag Team Championships
Sarita & Rosita vs. “Showtime” Eric Young & ODB (c)

Tenay & Taz announce that EY & ODB’s “wedding” will be on April 12th on Impact Wrestling (oh joy). ODB & Rosita will start this off and ODB kicks it off with a chest bump to Rosita and then she picks Rosita up and slams her into the corner. ODB hits a Corner Splash and then follows up with the Bronco Muncher attempt, but Rosita moves and then tags Sarita in. Sarita slams ODB into the turnbuckles repeatedly and then tosses her across the ring and follows up with a series of Elbow Drops. Sarita then hits a Somersault Senton and then locks in a Front Facelock. Sarita hits another Elbow Drop and then tags Rosita back in. Rosita puts the boots to ODB in the corner and then she charges at her but ODB gets a boot up and then Spears Rosita! ODB almost tags out but Sarita runs in and stops her only to get kicked off. ODB tags in EY who then starts doing cartwheels around the ring as Sarita & Rosita look confused. EY then pulls his pants down revealing his damn pink speedo. Sarita & Rosita start flirting with EY and he looks to be digging it which pisses ODB off. ODB punches Rosita and then clotheslines Sarita out of the ring! ODB hits the BAM on Rosita! ODB then gets in EY’s face and tells him to pull his pants back up. She asks him where his ring is and then she kisses him before forcing him to cover Rosita for the pin. That was special.

Winners & STILL KO Tag Champs: EY & ODB via pinfall (BAM)

————————————COMMERCIAL BREAK——————————————–

Clips of the Tag Title match from Victory Road are shown and then we cut to Crimson watching Morgan’s Direct Auto commercial. Crimson says that commercial is the problem with their team right there, he says it’s always been about Morgan rather than the team. He then says Morgan dropped the ball in the ring and says he did to Morgan what he does to his trash: took it out. Crimson challenges Morgan to a match for next week and then Morgan runs in and starts beating the hell out of Crimson and says no need to wait! Agents come in to separate them but Morgan takes them out too. Morgan continues to beat on Crimson until about 10 security guards run in and pull him off. Morgan screams “you’re done son!”

A rundown of Sting stepping down from GM is shown and then Dixie says she doesn’t know what she’s going to do.

————————————COMMERCIAL BREAK——————————————–

In the back Jeff Hardy talks about the feud with Kurt Angle. He says Kurt had to cheat to beat him and he needs Kurt in a Cage and suggests a match at Lockdown when Joseph Park walks up. He says his research has shown that Jeff and Abyss (his brother) have had some brutal matches. Jeff says he has no idea where Abyss is and then Joseph gives him his card and walks away.

A video package hyping up Storm-Roode for Lockdown is shown going over the history of the two with interviews from both, absolutely excellent job. They talk about their beginnings in TNA with Team Canada (Roode) and Americas Most Wanted (Storm) with clips of both their early promos and matches. Storm says he’s been in TNA since day one and he’s seen them all come and go (with clips of guys like Ron Killings and Christian shown) and if you asked him who the two guys that have been with TNA since day one were he himself wouldn’t have bet on himself (AJ is the other one) being one of them. Storm says he loves the people who never gave him a chance to make it because those are the people he strives to prove wrong. He says people said he’ll never be a great singles wrestler, on a tag team wrestler, and he tells those people to watch Lockdown because he’ll prove them wrong too.

James Storm makes his way down to the ring and says there seems to be some people running around the back that have forgotten what right and wrong is. He says he lives by the golden rule of “eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth.” Storm says one thing that’s wrong for a example is that football is only 18 weeks, he thinks it should be all year long (me too). He says another thing that bothers him is gasoline prices and yet another thing is what Bobby Roode did at Victory Road to Sting and Dixie. He says Bobby put his hands on a woman and his daddy always told him that a man that hits a woman is not a man at all. Storm says at Lockdown he’s going to be inside a Steel Cage with Storm and he WILL be the next World Champion. He says he will right all of Roode’s wrongs at Lockdown but right now he’s not out to right any wrongs, he just wants Roode to come out so Storm can beat the living hell out of him. Roode’s music hits as Tenay calls him the “scum of the earth.”

Instead of Bobby Roode coming out a man in a suit walks out. Storm asks him who the hell he is and then the man says his name is William Kelly and he is Bobby Roode’s legal advisor. He says he is here to read a statement on behalf of Roode:

“Mr. Robert Roode, you’re World Heavyweight Champion, will remain in his home in Toronto, Canada until further notice. We feel that management has created an unsafe working environment for my client. The only outstanding obligation is at Lockdown in a World Title Match in a Steel Cage against Mr. James Storm. My client is very confident that he will win that match. In reference to Mr. Storm who challenged my client to an impromptu fight on Sunday night, Mr. Roode has a suggestion if he’s looking for a fight tonight. Two wrestlers have contacted Mr. Roode in regards to facing Mr. Storm: Christopher Daniels & Frankie Kazarian. The choice of who is in the match belongs to Mr. Storm. In closing, the World Champion Mr. Robert Roode, apologizes to all of his fans who have tuned in to see him in action and he looks forward to wrestling at Lockdown, and soundly defeating Mr. Storm.”

Storm says he’ll make the choice real easy he’ll fight them both tonight so he doesn’t have to worry about the other one next week and then he asks to borrow that piece of paper and then he takes the man’s glasses off. He says he wants to send a little message back to Roode that he can take back to him and then asks for a pen, but he’s never been too good at writing to so he Last Call Superkicks his teeth down his throat! Storm then tells him to tell Roode “sorry ’bout your damn luck!”

In the back Kurt Angle asks why the hell Jeff Hardy would want a rematch with him after what he did to Hardy at Victory Road. The camera guy reminds Angle that Garett won the 5-Minute Challenge so Angle goes to find Garett and asks him if he’s walking around telling people that he beat him. Garett says he did technically last the 5 minutes with him. Angle gets pissed off and asks him if he wants to try and last 3 minutes tonight. Garett says he’ll try his best and Angle says “I bet you will, I hate your stinking guts” and then walks off.

————————————COMMERCIAL BREAK——————————————–

3-Minute Challenge Match
“Olympic Hero” Kurt Angle vs. Garett Bischoff

Garett just has to last the 3 minutes without being pinned or submitted to win. Angle gets in Garett’s face and then shoves him but Garett doesn’t back down. He shoves Garett again and again Garett gets in his face so Kurt slaps him. Garett shoves Angle back and Angle gets pissed and then swings at him but Garett ducks and clotheslines Angle twice! Garett hits the ropes and connects with a Running Shoulder Block and then a Flapjack! Garett kicks Angle and hits a modified Diamond Cutter! 1…2…NO Angle kicks out! Garett kicks Angle again and goes for another Cutter but Angle blocks it this time and then tosses Garett over the top and to the floor. Garett starts to get back in the ring but then stops as he notices the clock and just decides to stay away from Angle so Angel goes out to get him but Garett rolls back intothe ring. Angle rolls back in and Garett rolls back out. Then Gunner runs down and attacks Garett before tossing him into the ring where the two beat the hell out of him.

Winner: NO CONTEST

Jeff Hardy runs down and chases off the heels!

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The Motor City Machine Guns promo that aired on Victory Road runs with the tag line “Coming Soon.” Save us Sabin!

TNA World Tag Team Championships
“Samoan Submission Machine” Samoa Joe & Magnus (c) vs. Mexican America w/Rosita & Sarita

Hernandez looks to have dropped a good bit of weight since the last time we saw him. Hernandez & Joe lockup and Joe forces Mex into the corner but Mex turns it around on him. Hernandez swings at Joe but Joe ducks and then takes Hernandez down with vicious strikes and stomps. Joe tags in Magnus and they whip Hernandez into the ropes. Joe with an Atomic Drop followed by a stomp from Magnus and then a Backsplash Senton from Joe! Magnus covers, 1…2…NO Mex kicks out! Magnus picks Mex up but Hernandez kicks him off and tags in Anarquia. Anarquia gets a hip toss from Magnus and then a back elbow. Magnus locks in a wristlock on Anarquia and then follows up with a series of right hands. Hernandez blind tags himself back in as Magnus hits the ropes only to eat a clothesline from Anarquia. Anarquia tosses him into the corner and then Mex hits him with a series of shoulder blocks followed by a Gutwrench into a Backbreaker over his shoulder! 1…2…NO Magnus kicks out! Mex tags Anarquia back in and then Anarquia hangs Magnus up in the ropes as Hernandez leapfrogs over him into a Cannonball onto Magnus! Anarquia covers Magnus and gets another nearfall and then starts biting Magnus! Anarquia slams his knee into the back of Magnus and then tosses him into the Mexican America corner before tagging Mex back in. Mex locks Magnus in a Bearhug but Magnus breaks it with repeated Forearms. Magnus hits the ropes only to get destroyed by a Shoulderblock from Hernandez! Hernandez covers Magnus but Magnus grabs the ropes to break it. Mex tags Anarquia back in and then hits a Corner Splash on Magnus. Hernandez then lifts Anarquia high up into the air into a Splash of his own but Magnus moves out of the way and Anarquia eats the turnbuckles! Hernandez charges at charges at Magnus but he moves and then hits a Lariat! Magnus tags in Joe who clotheslines Anarquia repeatedly and then whips him into the corner. Joe charges at him but Anarquia gets his boot up and then climbs up top. Anarquia dives off with a Missile Dropkick but Joe nonchalantly moves out of the way and then kicks Hernandez and attempts to whip him into the corner. Mex reverses it and then goes for a Splash on Joe but Joe catches him in midair with a Standing Rock Bottom! Joe measures Anarquia and then locks in the Coquina Clutch! Rosita & Sarita get up on the apron as Anarquia taps to distract the referee! The repo dude runs out and drags Sarita & Rosita to the back (Taz with the line of the night: I wouldn’t mind repossessing those two.). Hernandez comes in and breaks up the Coquina Clutch and then sets up for the Border Toss but eats a Running Mafia Kick from Magnus! Magnus whips Joe into a Running Back Elbow on Anarquia followed by a Leaping Enziguri! Joe hits a Snapmare Takeover sending him right into the Flying Elbow from Magnus! Joe covers, 1…2…3!

Winners & STILL Tag Champs: Joe & Magnus via pinfall (Flying Elbow Drop)

Backstage Hulk Hogan arrives.

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In the back the Repo dude drags them to the back and then he’s about to repossess their car when Hernandez & Anarquia walk up and beg him not to take the car. Anarquia swings at the dude but he ducks and shoves him into Hernandez. Hernandez tells him he needs to upgrade anyway. He tells Rosita & Sarita to come with him because they don’t have a car anymore and Sarita says “no money, no honey” and they walk off with him.

Next week they will premier the official music video for James Storm’s theme.

Main Event
Handicap Match
“Cowboy” James Storm vs. Kazarian & “Fallen Angel” Christopher Daniels

Daniels says “I’m a lot smarter than the Cowboy” and then walks to the back as Kazarian enters the ring. As Storm makes his entrance Daniels tries to attack him from behind but east a Hip Toss on the ramp from Storm! Storm throws Kazarian into the ring steps as Daniels rolls into the ring. Storm nails Daniels with a series of clotheslines and then he beats on Daniels in the corner until Kaz attacks him from behind. Daniels & Kaz keep pushing each other out of the way as they beat on Storm. Storm comes back with rights on Daniels but Kaz hits him from behind again. They take turns beating on Storm again tossing him all around the ring. Daniels elbows Storm in the back and then covers him for a nearfall. Kaz beats on him some more and then covers him for a nearfall of his own. Daniels holds Storm and tells Kaz to hit him but Kaz pulls him away and starts choking Storm on the ropes. Daniels screams at Kaz to do what he says. They argue and then Kaz whips Daniels towards Storm but Storm moves and then hits Kaz with the Last Call! Daniels turns around and eats a Last Call as well! 1…2…3!

Winner: Storm via pinfall (Last Call)

————————————COMMERCIAL BREAK——————————————–

Sting makes his way back out to the ring and asks Dixie to come back out to the ring to finish their conversation from earlier. Dixie doesn’t make him wait very long. Sting says he’s known Hogan for 20 years and ever since he cut Bischoff out of his life at BFG we’ve seen the real Hogan. He says that he’s looked into Hogan’s eyes and he trusts him so in return he asks Dixie to trust him. Dixie says Sting knows that she trusts him and he’s never steered her wrong then if Sting believes in Hogan then she believes in Sting so “let’s do this.” Sting calls Hogan out to the ring now.

Hulk Hogan makes his way down to the ring and Sting says it’s obvious that Hogan has made him a believer. He says they believe in Hulk Hogan and now he needs to hear from all the people in the crowd. They chant for Hogan and then Sting says they believe and starts a “Hogan” chant himself. The show ends with Hogan looking out at the crowd thinking about the decision.


FINAL THOUGHTS

I really wasn’t feeling tonight’s show much at all after what I thought was a surprisingly good PPV Sunday night.

The opening segment with Sting and Dixie was disappointing 1) because Dixie’s acting was pretty awful after I thought she did really well on Sunday and 2) because I would rather Sting just remain the GM and move away from the wrestling aspect. I really don’t want to see Hogan back in an “authority role.” He just doesn’t do well there and it just seems like we’re moving right back into the way it was before his heel turn. Why would Dixie trust Hogan after what he and Bischoff did, regardless of what Sting says?

The X-Division 4-Way was really heating up when Ray came out and jumped everybody. It doesn’t make them look weak in my opinion since they were all laid out after a big move and it gets Ray his heat back after the PPV so really nothing wrong there. A rematch at the PPV in X-Division Xscape could be fun.

I HATE that EY and ODB are the KO Tag Champs, it makes zero sense and is just pointless. Now we get to see yet another terrible wrestling wedding. Just leave it alone.

I don’t care about Garett and nothing they do makes me. I do, however, want to see Hardy and Angle in the cage.

Really good tag match tonight and it’s obvious that TNA is just putting a few teams in front of Joe & Magnus to give them some quality wins before the Machine Guns make it back. That feud should be unbelievably fun and could potentially rival the Machine Guns-Beer Money feud from a couple of years ago. Hopefully the first match is at Lockdown.

All of the build for Roode-Storm was excellent, especially the video package and promo from Storm. I hate Handicap Matches so I wasn’t happy to see that as the Main Event and it was very short. It was mainly just there to make Storm look strong again and continue the weirdness of Kaz & Daniels’ relationship. No involvement from AJ tonight though.

QUICK RESULTS:
1) TNA X-Division Title Fatal 4-Way: Austin Aries (c) fought Zema Ion, Tony Nese, & Kid Kash to a NO CONTEST (Aries retains)
2) TNA KO Tag Titles: Eric Young & ODB (c) def. Sarita & Rosita to retain the titles!
3) 3-Minute Challenge: Garett Bischoff fought Kurt Angle to a NO CONTEST
4) TNA Tag Titles: Samoa Joe & Magnus (c) def. Mexican America to retain the titles!
5) Handicap Match: James Storm def. Daniels & Kazarian

Promo/Segment of the Night: James Storm
Match of the Night: X-Division 4-Way/Tag Titles (**1/2)
Overall Grade: D+

Scheduled for Next Week:
– Matt Morgan vs. Crimson
– Velvet Sky vs. Madison Rayne
– Mr. Anderson vs. Jeff Hardy

Lockdown Lineup:
-TNA World Title Steel Cage Match: Bobby Roode (c) vs. James Storm

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