Are you ready? Then stop questioning your heart and join me because it is time for Monday Night RAW!!!
Credit to WWE.com for the first eight minutes of this recap tonight. (My class ran late, sorry!)
“John Cena officially joined The Nexus”
Impossible. That seemed to be the most appropriate word to describe it. Less than 24 hours after losing his match to Wade Barrettt at Hell in a Cell, John Cena suffered the consequences. As a man of his word, Cena faced Barrettt and his cohorts in The Nexus, donned one of their trademark armbands and read a statement describing himself as an official member of the group.
The gutting transformation took place after it was revealed that Cena lost in great measure thanks to season two NXT Rookies Michael McGillicutty and Husky Harris, who interfered at Hell in a Cell. Naturally, Barrettt denied any knowledge of their plans. Afterward, he permitted Cena to choose a partner in a tag team match against Mark Henry & Evan Bourne. The Nexus’ newest and most reluctant member chose a man who, moments earlier, had relished presenting him with his distinctive armband: Michael Tarver.”
And I’m back!
Michael Tarver & John Cena w/ Nexus v. Evan Bourne & Mark Henry
The match starts with John Cena in the ring with Evan Bourne. Cena offers his hand for a shake. Tarver yells at him saying that the Nexus doesn’t shake hands, they fight. Cena tags in Tarver and tells him to show him the Nexus Way.
Back from commercial it is Tarver in the ring with Mark Henry. Tarver is on the mat and being stomped on by Henry. Henry wrenches the wrist of Tarver, and sends the Nexus member down to the mat. Henry takes him to the corner and tags in Bourne. Tarver’s arm is held by Henry, and Bourne leaps from the top rope to hit the arm. Bourne goes for the cover, but Tarver kicks out.
Bourne locks on a side headlock as Cena mockingly holds out his arm for a tag. Bourne hits a sharp kick to the back of Tarver, and brings in Henry. Tarver tries to make it to the corner, but Henry laughs as Cena shies away from the tag, which allows Henry to catch with Tarver. Henry ensnares the medical mask wearing star with a front head lock. Henry stands on top of Tarver, and then tags in Bourne. The high flyer comes into the ring and hits a beautiful standing moonsault. Cover attempt, but Tarver kicks out.
Tarver is able to get in a couple of punches, but Bourne is able to duck a clothesline. Bourne is looking for a forearm, but Tarver connects with a belly-to-belly suplex. Both men are flat on their backs. Tarver makes it over to the corner to tag in Cena, but Cena jumps off the apron. Cena has apparently left to sign autographs at ringside! Henry comes in and connects with a World’s Strongest Slam to end this match.
Winners via Cena signing autographs: Evan Bourne & Mark Henry
After the match, Cena says that he would like to make a statement of his own. He says that as the newest member of Nexus, he has one plan. As a member of Nexus he has one goal. To destroy it from the inside. Tonight, he will prove that you can be Nexus AND against us! With that he punches Tarver in the head with the microphone. Tarver slides outside of the ring, and Cena follows after. Cena charges and connects with a clothesline on the outside.
Cena takes the rings steps apart, setting the lower portion next to Tarver. Cena laughs at his Nexus arm wear he is forced to appear with, and turns his attention to Tarver. Cena scoops Tarver into the air, and connects with a devastating slam on the steel steps. Cena soaks up the crowd for 45 seconds, and decides that he isn’t through quite yet. He lifts up Tarver and hits another scoop slam on the steps!
Cena rolls Tarver into the ring and follows after. Cena hits a harsh shoulder block, and then pulls Tarver into the middle of the ring. Cena locks on the STF as Tarver is forced to scream in agony.
And I quote…
The terms of the stipulation for your match with Wade Barrett stated that if you lost, you must join the Nexus. Now Nexus is clearly a group that takes direction from its leader Wade Barrett. Thus, as a member of the group you must also take direction from Wade Barrett, if you don’t, as much as I would hate to do it, as much as it would be bad for business, as much as the WWE universe would despise it, I would have no alternative but to terminate your WWE contract. Mr. Cena, No one man, despite his popularity, is bigger than WWE. In other words, Mr. Cena, I will fire you.
Cena looks dumbfounded in the middle of the ring. Cena finds himself between a rock and a hard place as he looks out at the crowd, truly unsure of what to do. Cena exits the ring, as the crowd chants “Never Give Up”. A frustrated Cena heads to the back.
Alicia Fox v. Natalya
Alicia Fox heads to the top rope and leaps for a crossbody. Natalya catches her, but Fox wriggles away. Natalya hits a spinning clothesline which sends Fox down to the mat. Natalya locks in the Sharpshooter, and this match is over!
Winner via Sharpshooter: Natalya
Johnny Knoxville is in the back with Gail Kim and one of the Bellas. He is talking about his new Jackass 3D movie. Zack Ryder comes up to say hello. Knoxville calls him a tool under his breath and begins to walk towards him. If you have seen the previews for the movie you will know about the giant hand stunt. Well, Ryder holds up his hand and gets smacked with a huge swinging hand! Ryder falls to the conveniently padded floor, writhing in pain.
Cena is asked by Josh Mathews what his thoughts are about what the General Manager said. Cena says that no matter what, he can’t get himself fired. Cena sees the mystery attackers (identified as Michael McGillicutty & Husky Harris from NXT Season 2) and runs after them. Cena winds up in the Nexus locker room. Wade grabs him by the shoulder and says that they have a lot to talk about.
Sheamus v. Daniel Bryan
The match starts with Sheamus going strong after Bryan. Sheamus pummels him into the corner, unrelenting with his kicks and punches. Bryan falls to the mat, and Sheamus keeps kicking him over and over again. The referee tells Sheamus to break it up, but the Celtic Warrior refuses. The ref calls for the DQ.
Winner via DQ: Daniel Bryan
Despite being disqualified, Sheamus is not finished. Sheamus grabs Bryan and slams him down to the mat hard with a High Cross.
Michael Cole is set up in the ring with the General Manager podium and computer. Cole informs us that the GM will no longer be communicating through the electronically altered voice after what happened last week. As a result, the GM will go back to communicating through the “voice of the WWE”, Michael Cole.
Video recap of Edge destroying the Laptop last week
Cole says that last week’s actions were unacceptable. So, Edge must come down and make an apology. Afterward, the GM will make a huge announcement regarding the WWE Championship.
Edge says that he is not going to apologize. This is because he is on a crusade against things which are stupid. The GM as a computer, is stupid. Michael Cole has been the epitome of stupid since 1997. Edge says he would rather listen to a recording of J.R., than listen to Michael Cole.
Cole announces that there will be a 20 man over the top rope Battle Royal tonight. The winner of which will face Randy Orton for the Title in three weeks at Bragging Rights. However, because of Edge disrespecting the General Manager, he will not be in the Battle Royal. This is because, Edge has been officially traded to Smackdown!
The crowd begins a “Spear” chant. Edge says, “you know what, Hallelujah”. Now, Edge won’t have to take orders from the stupid GM, or listen to Michael Cole say the worse catchphrase in the history of the WWE, “and I quote”.
Cole is furious, and says that his “Cole Miners” love when he says that. He demands that as the voice of the WWE, he be shown respect.
Edge says how about he go out on a high note, and spear Cole tonight!
The Miz’s music hits and he comes down the entrance ramp with Alex Riley. Miz says that Cole is awesome, after all he recognized The Miz’s potential before anyone else. Edge calls Miz an “Edge wannabe”. He points out similarities such as Tag Title holder, wearing a trench coat to the ring, and winning Money in the Bank. Alex Riley stands up for Miz, saying that he is the future of the WWE, and awesome.
Edge says that he is indeed awesome, awesome at tapping out to Daniel Bryan. Miz says he can try to agitate him, but it doesn’t matter because he is either going to go to Bragging Rights and win the Title, or lead RAW to victory.
Edge has had just about enough, and punches Riley in the face! Edge then knocks Miz back into the podium. Riley is about to get hit with the spear, but Miz comes up from behind Edge and hits him with the Skull Crushing Finale!
In the back, Cena is looking rather upset in the Nexus locker room. Wade says that he actually isn’t mad about Cena taking out Tarver, because he has been looking to do the same for quite some time. Wade says that it is up to Cena to help him win the Battle Royal tonight. Cena asks what happens if he doesn’t. Wade says that isn’t an option because it is an order. If Cena doesn’t do it, then he will be fired! Otunga tries to chime in and say that if Wade is eliminated Cena must help one of them win instead. Wade isn’t too keen on that prospect and says that no, Cena must follow his orders or be fired.
LayCool v. The Bella Twins
LayCool are wearing wireless body mics for this match. They talk the entire time. The Bellas do the Twin switchearoo, and pick up the roll up victory.
I honestly apologize, but there was just no way to recap whatever the hell I just saw. I agree with Michael Cole, just turn the mic off.
Winners: Bella Twins
Maryse is in the back with Johnny Knoxville. She says that she knows he is the one who sent the letters. Dibiase appears in the same doorway that Ryder was in earlier. Knoxville tries to warn him about the hand, but it’s too late. Dibiase gets clobbered by the giant high five gimmick. Maryse runs over to see if he is ok, and throws her high heels at Knoxville. Maryse triggers the trap, and gets hit by the hand as well, landing on top of Dibiase.
Justin Roberts welcomes Johnny Knoxville out to the ring. Knoxville tries to rush his promo. He says that his movie is coming out, and please go watch it. Thanks for having him. Knoxville tries to escape, but Dibiase’s music hits.
Dibiase and Maryse make their way down to the ring. Dibiase yells at Knoxville, saying he has jokes. Knoxville tries to respond, but Dibiase punches him in the face. Dibiase then locks on Dream Street until Knoxville passes out.
The Titantron lights up, and says “You are mine”. The lights in the arena go gold, and Goldust appears in the ring behind Dibiase! Goldust nails him with a twisting suplex, and then falls to his hands and knees over top of him. Goldust has a mic and says that he doesn’t want Dibiase. Goldust then corners Maryse, but says that he doesn’t want her either. Goldust then sees the Million Dollar Belt laying on the mat, and walks over to it. Goldust drops to the mat and looks at the belt saying, “I want you!”. Goldust proceeds to caress the and make the equivalent of belt love to the Million Dollar Title.
In the back, Cena is staring at his Nexus arm band. Otunga comes up and assures Cena that Nexus is not all bad. Otunga says that Barrett may be a bit demanding, but they can make it work. Otunga says that if Cena ever needs to talk, he is there for him.
20 Man Battle Royal
John Morrison v. Wade Barrett v. David Otunga v. John Cena v. Justin Gabriel v. R-Truth v. Heath Slater v. Santino v. Kozlov v. Sheamus v. Darren Young v. William Regal v. David Hart Smith v. William Regal v. Tyson Kidd v Evan Bourne v. Mark Henry v. The Miz v. Zack Ryder v. Primo v. Ted Dibiase
Evan Bourne has been eliminated
David Hart Smith has been eliminated
William Regal has been eliminated
Santino has been eliminated
Zack Ryder has been eliminated
Primo has been eliminated
Cena saves Mark Henry from being eliminated, and then the rest of Nexus takes out Henry.
Mark Henry has been eliminated
David Otunga and the rest of Nexus is furious at Cena. Otunga tries to talk to him, but gets chucked out of the ring by Cena!
David Otunga has been eliminated
During the break: Kozlov & Darren Young were eliminated
Heath Slater has been eliminated
Cena again fights hard to save Wade from being eliminated.
Tyson Kidd has been eliminated
The Miz has been eliminated
Justin Gabriel has been eliminated
R-Truth has been eliminated
Ted Dibiase has been eliminated
The final four remaining are Wade, Cena, Sheamus & Morrison. Cena stands guard in front of Wade. Sheamus and Morrison go right for Cena. Wade comes in to make the save, and goes after Morrison. Sheamus and Cena are entangled in the opposite corner. Morrison goes for a kick, but eliminates himself.
John Morrison has been eliminated
Cena hits a running shoulder block on Sheamus. Cena hits the side slam and goes for the 5 Knuckle Shuffle. Cena lifts Sheamus up on his shoulders, but Sheamus was able to escape and hits the Irish Curse backbreaker. Sheamus charges for the bro kick, but Cena ducks! Sheamus finds himself on the apron, and gets punched off by Cena!
Sheamus has been eliminated
The final two are Cena and Barrett. Cena wants to fight, but Barrett is ordering him to leave the ring. If Cena doesn’t follow orders, he will be fired. It’s decision time as Cena weighs his options. Wade tells him to go. Cena starts to back towards the ropes. Cena walks right up to Wade and stares him down. Cena realizes that he really has no choice. John walks over to the corner, and climbs over the top rope! Cena is staring Barrett down, moments from stepping down from the ring. Cena jumps to the ground, and eliminates himself!
John Cena has been eliminated
Winner: Wade Barrett
After the match, Randy Orton’s music hits. He comes down to the ring and stares down Barrett. Orton holds his Title above his head as RAW goes off the air.
The big question coming in to the RAW broadcast tonight was: how would John Cena mesh together with the Nexus? Follow up questions included the identity of Cena’s mystery attacker, and whether or not the General Manager would nullify the match as a result of the interference.
Aside from that big story, there was a lot which happened at the PPV , a portion of which I would like to discuss. I have to admit that I was shocked as I perused the internet today as I read different recaps and opinions about the PPV. I’m honestly beginning to wonder whether I am shown a different broadcast than the rest of the so-called wrestling media.
Right off the bat, I want to say that I enjoyed the PPV. I’m not going to claim it as amazing, because it wasn’t, but I felt as though it was an all around solid PPV. The show started with a bang. I was a bit skeptical about the concept of a triple-threat-submissions-count-anywhere match, yet it worked. This match easily stole the show in my opinion, and for good reason. Morrison, Miz and Bryan pulled off a hell of a match.
The match had everything that I look for in wrestling. It told a story. The progression of Miz and Bryan was done well, especially the tasteful inclusion of Alex Riley. For the first time, Morrison’s involvement actually made sense as well. Honestly, I didn’t “get it” initially. After all, why would Morrison have anything to do with this feud? Was Morrison needed? No, but he felt strongly enough about the Miz constantly degrading him and decided that no existing storyline was going to stand in his way. That actually works for me. It’s a stretch, but I’ll buy it.
The action in the match was great, easily one of my favorite three ways from the WWE in recent memory. There were lots of really eye catching moments, as well as replay worthy spots. Most importantly, it was a fun match that kept me entertained. I don’t know about you, but that’s why I watch wrestling.
Anyway, enough about the Hell-in-a-Cell PPV, let’s talk about RAW.
It sucks to be Michael Tarver. The match that opened up the show was pretty cute. That’s probably a horrendous word to describe the match, but it really fits the match. Everything was perfect and campy with what you would expect.
Alicia Fox was squashed tonight. It’s the small things in life that make me happy.
Apparently, nothing quite screams “PG” like Jackass.
Watching Bryan get demolished by Sheamus was kind of depressing.
Whoever came up with the name “Cole Miners” for fans of Michael Cole is a genius. Now where did I put my pick axe?
RAW got really weird after the 10:00 break. Seriously, it just got really bizarre. First, I had to deal with whatever the hell that LayCool mic gimmick was. I never want to see that happen again, ever. I couldn’t focus to recap through that match. I’ll admit I thought it was a good idea at first. It was one of those things where I thought to myself, “why hasn’t this been done before?”. I now understand why it hasn’t been done. Unlike Parkour & Morrison which was a good idea that hadn’t been done before, body mics while in the ring is a TERRIBLE idea. PLEASE NEVER DO IT AGAIN.
Alright, I think I got my point across.
Second, we had the Dibiase/Maryse segment. The Goldust revelation was interesting. It makes more sense than someone having a crush on Dibiase or Maryse. Ok, maybe I shouldn’t say that the angle “makes sense”, BUT I really loved it. There was something about watching Goldust wriggle around on the mat like a fool with the belt that was ridiculous, yet ridiculously awesome.
The “wtf” continued as Otunga had a heart to heart with Cena. If I was in Cena’s position I would definitely confide in Otunga (sarcasm abounds).
If Edge got “traded” to Smackdown, who did RAW get in return?
John Cena played his role to perfection tonight. Every single facial expression and action made sense. The WWE clearly put a lot of thought into this storyline, and tonight it showed. I guess it is easy to forget that there are fans out there really attached to the Cena character. So I think that creative is cradling the character perfectly. Well done. It will be interesting to watch the progression of this storyline over the next couple of weeks.
It was good to see Randy Orton finally make an appearance at the end of the show. Nice to see you, Champ.
I do read every single e-mail you guys send, and really appreciate hearing your thoughts. Send me some e-mails, and have a safe week everyone!
So that’s RAW…. Love it? Hate it? Disagree with everything I said? Just want to chat wrestling? I’m always up for reading your thoughts and do my absolute best to reply to every message I get. Send them over to me at email@example.com. (there were a lot of great ones that I didn’t get a chance to respond to this past week, and I hope to reply to them this week so sorry if you were one of them!)
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