Are you ready? Then stop questioning your heart and join me because it is time for Monday Night Raw!
RAW kicks off with the return of the Chairman of the Board, Vince McMahon!! Now that the Super Bowl is over, he says that it is time for Wrestlemania. He announces that next week in Anaheim, live on RAW, we will find out the identity of the guest host of Wrestlemania. It is someone who has hosted 75,000 people, and is the only person capable of hosting such an event.
Randy Orton’s music hits and he walks down to the ring. He has a message for CM Punk. He says that Punk will lose a hell of a lot more than just Husky Harris. This war will cost him dearly.
CM Punk’s music hits and he comes out to the entrance ramp. The New Nexus leader takes a seat on the stage, because he is stymied that Orton and he agree on something. Punk says that indeed this is not over by a long shot. Punk says that the reason he attacked Orton is because back at Unforgiven in 2008, Punk was called a fluke by Orton, jumped by Legacy, and then hit with a punt while he was the World Heavyweight Champion. Punk says that he has waited this long to get is revenge. Punk’s actions are defensible, but Orton’s are not. Punk is right, Orton is not. Punk claims that as long as they are on the same show, Orton will never be Champion again. Punk says that he has waited long enough for revenge, and quite frankly he isn’t going to wait any longer. The New Nexus appears, and they make their way down to the ring.
Mason Ryan, Michael McGillicutty and David Otunga slide into the ring and begin the onslaught. At first Orton attempts the attack, but the numbers game is too strong. Punk walks into the ring and begins to speak, but Orton momentarily breaks free and charges at him. Nexus fights him off and traps his arms in between the top and bottom ropes. Punk squeezes his face, and starts to yell at him. Orton butts him in the head, and connects with a kick. That’s enough for the New Nexus, as they beat Orton to the point of being incapable of defense. Punk’s nose is starting to bleed. Punk calls for Orton to be placed on his shoulders, and connects with the GTS.
During the break, the Mystery GM announced that all the members of the New Nexus would face participants in the Elimination Chamber, culminating with CM Punk v. John Cena.
Mason Ryan v. R-Truth
R-Truth hips and hops his way down to the ring. Truth says, “Green Bay” instead of “Milwaukee” in his catch phrase. Truth is backed into the corner and hit with a shoulder. Truth is sent to the opposite corner, and tries to flip free, but gets a fist to the back. The crowd starts a, “Milwaukee” chant. Ryan continues the damage as he pummels the back of Truth with a series of kicks. Truth appears to have tweaked his knee, and Ryan immediately focuses on the body part. He picks up Truth and chucks him into the ropes leg first. He continues the attack, and then goes for a leg submission. He pulls the leg up and over his head, forcing Truth into a great deal of pain. With the Argentine Leglock applied, the referee calls for the bell.
**Despite the submission, Ryan does not relinquish the hold. The referee reverses his rule and calls the match a DQ a la Rock v. Shamrock from Wrestlemania 14.
Winner via DQ: R-Truth
After the match, Ryan attempts to take a steel chair into the ring, but a referee stops him. Ryan instead rolls back into the ring and continues the Argentine Leglock to his heart’s content.
We head to the Nexus locker room. Punk looks furious. Mason Ryan walks in, and Punk asks him what just happened. Ryan didn’t win… but Punk thanks him! Punk tells the group that tonight their objective isn’t to win, but to hurt their opponents. Not enough that they can’t compete in the Chamber, because they’ll be replaced, but just enough to weaken them. Otunga starts to ask if Punk is sure he should face Sheamus, but Punk cuts him off and says that he has nothing to worry about.
The Bellas & Melina v. Gail Kim, Eve Torres & Tamina
Natalya joins commentary for the match.
One of the Bellas and Kim start out the match. Kim is thrown to the mat, and a Bella double team begins. Kim finds herself planted on the second rope, as Melina is tagged into the match. Melina applies a submission to the arm of Kim, and then heads to the corner. Melina connects with a kick, but then gets drilled by Kim. The Divas Champion, Eve, comes into the match. She bounces off the ropes and connects with a kick to the face. Eve hits a standing moonsault, and goes for the cover. One of the Bellas breaks the hold. All hell breaks loose as all the Divas seem to run into the match. When the dust settles, it is Eve Torres left with Melina. Torres hits a neck breaker, and this match is over.
Winner via Neck Breaker: Eve Torres, Gail Kim & Tamina
2-21-11 teaser airs
John Morrison v. Michael McGillicutty
Morrison is strong on the attack, and punches Michael back into the ropes. McGillicutty swings around and kicks Morrison to the mat. He whips him hard into the corner, and then leaps on his chest to punch his head. Morrison is clawing his way to the apron, so Michael jumps out of the ring and continues the attack. He grabs the arm of Morrison and slams him shoulder first into the steel steps. Michael then pulls back the steel steps, and places Morrison’s arm in between. Michael charges and kicks the steps, but Morrison moves out of the way.
McGillicutty rolls back into the ring, but Morrison has had time to recover. Morrison connects with a spinning heel kick, followed by the Flash Kick. Morrison hits Starship Pain, and this match is over.
Winner via Starship Pain: John Morrison
As Morrison heads to the top of the ramp after his victory, CM Punk appears. Punk sprays something into the face of Morrison.
The Miz & Alex Riley make their way down to the ring. Miz says that last week while he watched the RAW Rumble on the screen in the back, he only had one thought on his mind – Jerry. Miz invites him into the ring as he has something to say to him. Miz asks Riley to leave, so that King doesn’t feel intimidated.
Jerry Lawler comes into the ring. Miz asks if Lawler knows the reason that he was rooting for him to win the Rumble. Miz says that the reason isn’t because Lawler is older, but because they are mirror images of each other. In his time, Lawler had one of the biggest mouths in the business. He even appeared on Letterman with Andy Kaufman. Miz says that he hasn’t admitted this to anyone before, but he has kind of patterned his career after Lawler’s. Today, everyone wants to see Miz on the talk shows, and to know what he is thinking. The only difference is that Lawler never held the WWE Championship.
Lawler says that he hopes that they aren’t mirror images, because he would hate to look in the mirror and see his hair cut like The Miz’s. Lawler says that he may have a big mouth, but he always backed it up. Lawler says that Miz may have patterned his career after Lawler, but Lawler never patterned his off of anyone. Miz counters, and says that while that may be true, he is also a cheap shot artist.
Clip airs of Ted Dibiase getting an amazing punch from Lawler last week.
Lawler says that it’s funny that Miz calls it a sucker punch, because Miz is a sucker. The crowd in Milwaukee knows that The Miz sucks. Lawler admits that not everything that comes out of Miz’s is manure, he has never been the WWE Champion, and he has never competed at Wrestlemania. But, no one knows how badly he wants to be the Champion, and to compete at ‘mania. Lawler has been in this business for 40 years, and he isn’t going to let this opportunity slip by. After he wins the belt at Elimination Chamber, and they come up to interview him, Lawler is going to say that he is going to Wrestlemania! Miz counters by saying that he will win, and everyone in the WWE Universe will know that he’s the Miz, and he’s – Lawler cuts him off and screams: AWFUL. He leads the crowd in an, “Awful” chant. Miz tries to punch him, but Lawler ducks and nails him in the face! Alex Riley runs into the ring, but Lawler is able to punch him, and then throw him to the outside. Ted Dibiase runs down to the ring and attacks Lawler. Daniel Bryan runs down to make the save!
And I quote…
Bryan & Lawler v. Miz & Dibiase, NOW
Daniel Bryan & Jerry “The King” Lawler v. The Miz & Ted Dibiase Jr.
Alex Riley joins Michael Cole on commentary for this match.
Ted and Bryan start off the match. Ted charges at Bryan and gets caught with a knee to the gut that sends him flipping to the mat. Bryan follows with fiery kicks, and then whips him hard into the corner. Bryan hits another kick, and goes for the cover. Ted kicks out. Bryan tags in Lawler. Bryan and Lawler hit a quick double team, but Lawler is hit with a punch, and Miz gets the tag.
Miz comes into the ring, only to get met with a duo of scoop slams. Miz ducks under a grab attempt, and Lawler crashes to the outside of the ring. Dibiase hits a cheap shot, as we go to commercial.
Back from the break, Miz is in the ring with Bryan. Miz whips him into the corner, but Bryan flips his way free. Bryan heads to the top rope looking for a missile dropkick, but Dibiase comes over to interfere. Miz uses the time to tag in his partner. Dibiase runs into the match, but Bryan is able to regain his ground and tag in Lawler. Dibiase is hit with a nice DDT, and Miz makes the save. Bryan runs into the ring, and throws Miz to the outside. Bryan follows right after with a suicide dive! Lawler takes to the second rope, and leaps for the diving fist drop. This match is over!
Winners via Diving Fist Drop: Jerry Lawler & Daniel Bryan
After the match, Alex Riley is still on commentary and vows that he will not allow Lawler to defeat Miz at the Elimination Chamber.
King Sheamus’ music hits, and he begins to make his way down to the ring. Josh Mathews appears halfway through the entrance to interrupt him. Josh asks Sheamus what he thinks about Mark Henry saying that he deserves to be in the Elimination Chamber rather than Sheamus. Sheamus scoffs at the notion, noting that Henry has been in the WWE for nearly 14 years. Sheamus doubts that Henry could even fit into the Chamber, maybe if it was a cake eating contest he would have a chance.
David Otunga begins his entrance down to the ring. He is wearing his badass looking Nexus sweatshirt. Before he even enters the ring, Henry’s music hits! Henry comes down to the ring and begins to attack Sheamus for his comments. Henry exchanges several blows before getting punched in the skull. David Otunga tries to climb to the top turnbuckle for some reason, but Sheamus knocks him to the outside. Sheamus then tries for a Brogue kick, but Mark Henry dodges, and counters into the World’s Strongest Slam! Henry picks up the limp body of Sheamus, and connects with another World’s Strongest Slam! David Otunga then walks into the ring, and stands over the body of Sheamus with his arm raised in the Nexus salute.
Alberto Del Rio’s music hits, and he drives out next to the ramp in a $100,000 car. His personal ring announcer does the honors of introducing him to the crowd.
Back from the break, The Royal Rumble winner is in the ring. “My name is Alberto Del Rio, but you already know that”, but what you might not know is that Santino Marella actually thinks that he came close to beating him at the Royal Rumble.
Santino’s music hits and he runs down to the ring.
Santino charges into the ring, and ducks a punch from Del Rio. He connects with one of his own. Del Rio attempts to throw him out of the ring, but Santino throws him out instead! Santino begins to celebrate.
Alberto Del Rio v. Santino Marella
The match officially starts at this point. Santino connects with a punch, and then dodges a leap from Del Rio, which sends Del Rio crashing to the outside of the ring! Del Rio slides back in, and then throws Santino shoulder first into the steel post. Del Rio locks on an arm bar, as Santino struggles to get to his feet. Del Rio lets him get to a vertical base, only to knock him back down to the mat. Del Rio lifts him up, and sets Santino in the corner. Del Rio leaps and hits a dropkick, but Santino looks to shake it off. Santino is very excited, and begins to pump up the cobra. Alberto dodges the move, and kicks Santino in the arm. Del Rio locks on his arm breaker finisher, and this match is over!
Winner via Submission: Alberto Del Rio
Vickie Guerrero walks out with Dolph Ziggler, shouting “Excuse Me”. She has something to say. Vickie announces that Dolph Ziggler will not be entering the Elimination Chamber as a competitor, but actually as the World Heavyweight Champion. This is because he will be defeating Edge this Friday on Smackdown for the Title.
Cena’s music hits. The crowd is hot as he makes his way down to the ring. Ziggler asks what his deal is, and why he is out here. Cena looks baffled, and the crowd begins a “Cena” chant. Cena says that he is out here to put a stop to this. He calls this more disturbing than Christian Aguilera butchering the National Anthem. Cena says that he is out here with an apology from R-Truth. Cena says that after Green Bay won last night, Truth celebrated a little bit too much, and still thinks that he is in Green Bay. But, Cena is out here to tell the nation that they are in Milwaukee! Cena also says that he is out here because it was so awesome the last time the three of them were in the ring together. Cena begins to talk about making out with her, which Vickie doesn’t appreciate. She begins to talk, but the crowd is going crazy. Vickie says that the crowd does not respect her, if they won’t respect her, then they are going to leave. Cena laughs, and says that all the crowd needs to do to make them leave is to make some noise! Cena leads the crowd in a Packer chant, and ultimately, Vickie and Dolph Ziggler head to the back.
Once they’ve left, Cena says that it is time to get down to brass tacks. He says that the New Nexus has taken out all of the competitors in the Elimination Chamber, in an attempt to catapult CM Punk to victory. The problem for them all is John Cena is still standing. He guarantees that he will defeat Punk, and whatever cronies run down to the ring tonight.
2-21-11 teaser airs, lyrics include “ain’t no grave that can hold my body down”
John Cena v. CM Punk
Both men charge at each other at the offset. Punk drops Cena to the mat, and then sets him up in the corner. Punk unloads with a series of fists until the referee pulls him off. Punk then whips Cena to the opposite corner. Punk sets and charges for a splash. Cena moves out of the way. Punk is still on his feet and kicks the back of Cena’s calf. Cena shakes off the kick, and sends Punk head first into the turnbuckle. Cena follows with a bulldog. Punk dodges a punch, and throws Cena to the outside of the ring. Punk stands on the apron, and leaps to the outside with a kick on Cena.
Cena makes his way back into the ring, and stands in the corner. Punk charges and connects with a high knee to the face of Cena, followed by a bulldog. Punk is grinning from ear to ear. Punk flashes the “you can’t see me” sign, and lifts Cena into the air for the GTS. Cena slips off his back, and begins to punch the hell out of Punk. The referee pull shim off and says that he will disqualify him if he keeps it up. John Cena shrugs, and low blows CM Punk!
Winner via DQ: CM Punk
The New Nexus run down to help Punk. Mason Ryan stays on the outside to comfort his fearless leader. Otunga and McGillicutty charge into the ring. Cena looks to the outside of the ring, and Jerry Lawler hands him a steel chair! Cena hits the New Nexus members in the gut, and then cracks the chair over their backs!
So Vince McMahon returned. That happened.
Yeah, No fanfare. No build up. Nothing. I actually kind of like it this way. He isn’t involved in any storylines, but wants to appear on his show. No big deal.
The Undertaker will be coming back on 2-21-11, that’s pretty clear after the lyrics on the teaser about no grave being able to hold him down. Sorry Sting Fans.
Who is the guest host going to be? I have no idea. Somebody that has hosted 75,000 people. Which, the Super Bowl hosted more than, despite McMahon’s claim, UNLESS he meant an individual hosting that many people, which would make sense given that it is one person hosting the show. I’m going to throw a name out here –
Your welcome, message boards around the internet that wanted something to go after me for this week.
Alright, seriously though what else happened on this bizarre episode of RAW?
R-Truth flubbed the name of the town. It wouldn’t have been that big of a deal, except that the crowd was hot tonight. Why wouldn’t they be? Their football team just won the Super Bowl. You have to love that they chanted the name of their city.
I was impressed that the storyline between CM Punk and Orton goes back three years. And yet, I still like the spilled Pepsi rational best for a Punk feud.
Is it just me or is R-Truth getting destroyed in the ring rather often lately?
Morrison got sprayed in the face with some sort of foreign substance. Obviously CM Punk thought that he had stolen his purse. Makes sense to me.
Jerry Lawler is a beast. Damn those punches rock my socks.
Cole needs to stop burying the heels as well as the faces. Pick one.
Henry looked pretty legit tonight. Take that Cake Eaters.
Alberto Del Rio was on RAW again. They do realize he is a Smackdown star… right?
Santino should have won the Rumble. (Yeah discuss that in your comments under this column, haters).
John Cena is the man. I was in awe of his verbal presentation tonight. He handled the crowd perfectly. Well done.
Vickie Guerrero – I love you.
That’s it. That’s all I’ve got for this apparently abstract RAW Thoughts section. Ah wrestling, just when I think I have you figured out, you baffle me with a presentation of RAW.
I do read every single e-mail you guys send, and really appreciate hearing your thoughts. Send me some e-mails, and have a safe week everyone!
– David Stephens
Follow me on Twitter! @davewrestleview
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