Hello once again students!! I hope your summer vacation is going well as usual and I am sure that all of you are just anxiously waiting for another school year to begin. Once again, I am Anthony J. Valvo certified teacher of Pennsylvania and resident teacher (or professor) of WrestleView.com. Welcome to the 29th edition of ?From the Desk of Mr. V?! Well, I will warn you wrestling was heavy and full of information this week, so my column is going to be exceptionally long this week.
DISCLAIMER: I warn you if you have ADHD or afraid of long columns, this one is not for you. Heck, you may need to brew a pot of coffee for this one. If you read this whole column in one sitting, let me know and I will give you a Gold Star because you will deserve one!
Also, I have to mention this one more time as I have you all sitting down looking at the computer screen. Here is an assignment for you to complete:
I said I was going to count the ballots and I will. Problem is?I have a lot of classroom rules to go over and not to mention a particular Pittsburgh wrestler in trouble with the law. However class, this is the last week you can participate in the 2009 Mid-Year Student Choice Awards! Currently I am a few ballots away from 50 and I would like to get it that far. So don?t be scared, fill out the ballot! Thank You.
My mixed bags of the world of sports entertainment are as always featured this week. I have EIGHT classroom rules to go over, a couple of headlines, TV Wars, Commentary Grades, Predictions Standings, and Gold Stars!!
QUOTE OF THE WEEK
I actually don?t have a quote to share this week, maybe except for one:
– Anthony J. Valvo
As you all know I read a lot of stuff on WrestleView and I try my best to read all of the columns and recaps when I get a chance. I am quite shocked and honored to have my named mentioned in some great columns on here.
David Stephens gave me the column of the week a few times this year.
Jose Marrero typed in his last column that he reads my column every week.
Mike Tedesco really, REALLY wants a point for the work this past week on WWE Superstars. We will see if that show gets it this time around later.
Josh Piedra mentioned Ecto Cooler, and my Trade Deadline in his columns.
Mike Siciliano mentioned my 2009 Power Rankings a few weeks ago, a true honor to my hard work creating that piece.
Joe Baiamonte and I shared a same person who bashed us about ripping on a particular woman wrestler.
Fifteen columnists participate in the Predictions from the Faculty article, and also over 60 fans of WrestleView have participated at least once in this game.
Not to mention over 300 e-mails amounted since the start of my column.
If I did not mention your name and I was mentioned in your column or something, please accept my apologies. I still can?t believe after 7 months my WrestleView peers and fans from around the world enjoy my columns and articles. If you enjoy my work, I will keep on doing my best to excel at it. Thank you for making ?From The Desk of Mr. V? a success since the first column back in early February.
Well, I know what you are thinking. It is the students that should suck up to the teacher, not the other way around. So what, I had my happy-go-lucky moment. Now onto the Classroom Rules.
Just to let my students know next week will be the FINAL WEEK that the students can send in classroom rules. After next week, the teacher takes over this section until we reach 100 rules.
This week, the students of WrestleView.com took advantage in this summer activity. Here are some rules that I believe should be imposed as fast as a ?V? word coming out of Michael Cole’s mouth.
73) If you’re putting together a wrestling faction comprised of people from Britain, Japan, Iran, and Canada, please have an appropriate theme song. (From: Bond7)
Student Explanation: I ask you, or anyone out there, can there be a more inappropriate theme song anywhere else in wrestling? When you think of those countries, and their music, is there any point in there where a harmonica comes into the mix? Seriously, it sounds like a chain gang singing the Folsom County Blues rather than an international conglomerate ready to take over TNA. Fix their theme now. Something with a more international flavor please.
Well Bond that is a good one. When I listened to the theme, I agreed it was terrible. I would think maybe more of a rock type theme, but hey the theme can be worse. It could be the Chris Jericho/Big Show theme.
74) If you’re supposed to be building a feud, don’t do the exact same thing four weeks in a row. (From: Bond7)
Student Explanation: I’m, of course, talking about what ECW is doing with Kozlov and Jackson. Coming out after the other’s match to do the exact same finishing move over and over to some poor jobber and then stare lovingly into each other’s eyes for a few moments… sorry, where was I? For four weeks straight? What’s up with that? Is that supposed to increase our interest in this (I hesitate to call it a) feud? If WWE thinks it is, I’ve got news for them. It’s not. You’ve gotta mix it up. Raise the bar each week. Do something different, for God’s sake.
Well, after Tuesday’s ECW I think we got our answer. They were not one-upping each other, they were acting like a team all along! So, I think the WWE answered this rule. They were not going to feud, but it was a buildup so that they can be lackeys for King William Regal.
75) Stop treating ECW like the old school WWF Superstars. (From: Bond7)
Student Explanation: Last week’s one hour ECW had two, count ’em, two matches with superstars against jobbers. It really did remind me of the old syndicated WWF Superstars I watched as a kid in the early ’90s where every match was a superstar against a jobber, except some weeks they would treat us to an actual match between two superstars. Look, I know you’ve got to build up the new kids on the block from the big Superstar Initiative, but can’t they at least do it against other guys on the roster? Wouldn’t that build them up even more? Can’t anybody on the roster take the ego hit? Beating a jobber means nothing, it doesn’t build anything, and to the viewing audience at home it’s just a waste of time. And why is Kozlov still wrestling jobbers?! He’s been there for over a year. Can’t they find somebody on the roster he can squash and take four finishers in a row between him and Jackson? WWE Superstars on WGN is supposed to be a revival of the old Superstars show from the ’90s, but if you ask me ECW is closer to the old Superstars than anything else. Superstars on WGN at least have matches between two superstars the entire hour. It’s nothing like the old Superstars. That would go to ECW, which is increasingly wasting time with jobber/squash matches.
Well, I think jobber matches are important to enhance the new WWE superstars. Tyler Reks can benefit from a win against a ?Mike Williams? or someone like that. Also, you don?t want to bury anyone on the ECW roster. If Reks would beat Zack Ryder say three times in a row, it would completely bury Ryder. However if Reks beats three jobbers week by week, no harm is done and everyone is happy. Now the case with Kozlov, that is still puzzling. You are correct on one thing, why is he wrestling jobbers? From a guy that apparently was supposed to challenge Undertaker’s winning streak to now beating up jobbers again. I don?t know about anyone here in this classroom, but Vladimir Kozlov needs some buildup. And no one better than Regal to help him on that.
Now, is ECW being treated like the old school WWF Superstars? I don?t think so because we are still seeing main event talent on what they call the #3 brand. You will still get a solid showing by Christian and some strong mid-card work. However if we see an ECW card that has most of their matches be a mid-card guy vs. a jobber, then it would be WWF Superstars, or All-American Wrestling (I still remember that show, it came on right after church).
76) Don’t run segments that make one of your stars look like a terrorist. (From: Michael Fox)
Student Explanation: The scenes I?m talking about are the ones involving Kane and Runjin Singh. Watching the news a couple weeks ago with the Idaho boy that was taken hostage by Al-qidea and then they release videos of him being held hostage, to me the segments on Smackdown involving Runjin Singh and Kane went too far. I am reminded of The Undertaker and Muhammed Hassan angles that UPN thought went over the line to me I think these went over the line, because of the state of the world today.
I completely agree 100% on this one, Michael. Good thing fans in India got this stuff edited out. Look, this feud is going nowhere and it is ridiculous. I would rather see Pretty Ricky go and act like a moron than see Kane and Khali feud in a boiler room. I don?t see the purpose for this to go further. Have Kane and Khali wrestle a couple of ?Grade D? matches and release Khali after their trip to India is over.
77) Don’t turn a wrestler heel when almost everybody applauded what he supposedly did to turn heel. (From: Bond7)
Student Explanation: Look, I know all about what Jesse Neal did and gave up for this country. And when he came to TNA he used all that background as part of his storyline. I know a lot of people felt a little uncomfortable with TNA using that… me included. So, for the sake of my argument, I’m not talking about Jesse Neal, the hero. I’m talking about Jesse Neal, the wrestler. Jesse Neal, the wrestler, is going nowhere. He comes out dressed like he’s wrestling for his high school team, rather than professionally. As far as his wrestling skills are concerned, he stinks. He’s not on TV for months at a time. The crowd couldn’t care less about him. And now Rhino finally gets fed up with him when Neal screws up once again last week on Impact, and proceeds to gore him into next week’s show. Did you see the crowd reaction? They erupted when Rhino did that! It was arguably the best reaction of the night. Another example that they were sick of putting up with Neal’s lame matches too. Then, Rhino does an interview with Lauren where he basically says the same thing, that he’s sick of putting up with him, that he’s a waste of time in the ring, and that it’s time for somebody who actually knows what they’re doing in the ring to get the air time instead. And Lauren reacts to him in disgust, like he’s turned heel. So, I guess in the TNA script, that means Rhino’s heel now. Why? It makes no sense for him to turn heel doing something that pretty much all the viewing audience couldn’t wait for Rhino to do in the first place.
Jesse Neal the hero does get my respect for serving our country. But think of other wrestlers that served in the military and still had great wrestling careers. Randy Orton was in the military, as well as B.G. James (who actually served in the Persian Gulf War). They trained and became champions because they were trained properly and worked hard to do their best. Jesse Neal believe it or not improved in last week’s match. I mean he can?t be any worse. With that all I will say here is the fans have a right to cheer and boo whoever they want. Rhino got cheered for going another wrestler and the fans probably cheered because I think it was the first time all year they saw a GORE!! If Rhino is heel, fine. But if this leads to a feud between Jesse Neal and Rhino, it will be depressing for the former ECW World Champion. If Neal gets the upper hand, Rhino might as well retire.
78) When you are the world champion and a top draw for a federation, you need to conduct yourself with proper actions. (From: Michael Pinion)
Student Explanation: After this weekend, Kurt Angle proved one thing to me. He is nothing but an out of control egomaniac. He proved to me this weekend that he is only out for himself. He was the one cheating Karen. He was the one to force the divorce. He threw a fit and had someone squeal about Karen/Jeff relationship so he can force Jeff out and tried to get power for himself. Now he gets arrested for violating a bunch of laws. If I was TNA, I would suspend him till he got his life straight or indefinitely. TNA just got embarrassed by someone who is looking to up by a million fans not for just pro wrestling, but wrestling as a whole. He won a gold medal and he is a top draw. Maybe this is a reality check for Mr. Angle.
I won?t go into much detail here with Kurt Angle now. You can find my real take on Kurt Angle under ?Headlines?
79) Don?t spend three weeks hyping a 10 minute walk to the ring and only have them get destroyed. (From: Ricky Langston)
Student Explanation: DX on Raw was something I had been waiting for for a while, and they wait until the second hour to even show them, then they spend ten minutes on the intro, then they say two words and freaking LEGACY runs in and interrupts it……I think Freddie needs to go back to his desk in creative.
Well, I actually liked this. Look, we know that DX is going to win their match. The WWE does not want to bury Cody and Ted. So Legacy destroying DX with the ?Cowboy Boot of Doom? during that segment helped build up the inevitable. A DX win at Summerslam.
80) When a superstar throws a piece of merchandise into the crowd, don’t steamroll children. (From: Ricky Langston)
Student Explanation: I know this will end up in the detentions later, but I?m mad at this guy, Speaking of DX. they come down to the ring throwing the little glow sticks as usual, and one of the pairs that Shawn threw some kid was grabbing it, and some nerdy dude Slams into him and grabs them, then goes back to his seat, like 20 rows above. People have no class these days. Well, Valvo has A class, but that’s different.
Those fans are just scum. Like I mentioned before, there are some fans that enjoy the entertainment aspect (like the people who read this column weekly). Then there are ?Those Guys? that enter Mr. V’s Detention. They know who they are.
Here is an example, say you (a common 20-something year old wrestling fan) are seated next to a 10 year old kid who is at his/her first WWE show. Suddenly, Evan Bourne is out and throws his shirt at the kid’s direction. Be a good person and let the kid have a clear shot at the shirt. If a 20-something mark yanks it from a kid, be the first people to point out how big of a dip$hit he is and if there is an ice cold beverage in your hand, pretend that you are tripping and spill it on this guy. If you are with the group, commence a beating on this jabroni.
HEADLINE #1: The Life of Kurt Angle
Look, I don?t have to recall all that went on in this story. I will just provide my take on this:
KURT ANGLE, PLEASE GET HELP!!!!
I don?t know if he is guilty or not. I do care because as a fan, he is one of my top five wrestlers ever. First off, I met him a year after he won the gold medal in the 1996 Olympic Games. This guy was very kind and honored to call Pittsburgh his home. Now thirteen years later, the guy is a train wreck. It’s sad, that is my thought on this issue.
I know that he was arrested for DUI a year or so ago, it did make the new here in Pittsburgh. I agreed with some that perhaps he should not have been charged because they busted him at his house. From my knowledge, he left the Sea Shell Lounge drunk and almost ran over two people. They called the police and I really don?t know what happened after that.
I am frightened that he can?t tell the difference between reality and fantasy. In his fantasy world (On-Screen) in TNA, he is ?The Boss?. He is the leader of the Main Event Mafia, the face of TNA. He is the king of the world! He is the TNA World Champion for crying out loud! In reality, he feels the same way. Angle will stop at nothing! It is costing this guy dearly. His ex-wife and kids live miles away from his home in Moon Township (not even 30 minutes from Mr. V’s headquarters). Now Rhaka Khan is saying that he is abusive and controlling. He is in a lot of pain and uses a lot of meds to cure them. He wants to be at the top in everything he does. How about for starters, be the best father you can be? Sure, your marriage is gone but your kids should be more important than this ?wrestling career?.
Angle is declining rapidly both physically and mentally, it is obvious. He wants to be the top dog; he wants to be the spotlight. He was like that since his days in Clarion University when he beat Sylvester Terkay (remember him?) to be the NCAA Wrestling Champion in the early 90s. However, one must have limitations and one must know the difference between right and wrong. I don?t think he knows that.
So, my advice to him would be this. If the WWE is offering free rehab to their former employees, accept it! Get clean not just for us wrestling fans and the people that surround you. Get clean for your children and for TNA Wrestling. It won?t destroy your career if you fess up to a drug problem. Some of the best wrestlers overcame the odds and had solid careers after they cleaned up.
Is he going to be the next wrestling tragedy? I pray that it is not the case. Professional Wrestling suffered a ton after the murder-suicide that happened in 2007. If this becomes a tragedy, I don?t think TNA will recover.
Will he ever go back to the WWE? I heard that he wanted to go back when his TNA contract is up. However he does not have that option anymore. Vince may be a stubborn old man, but he is not stupid by all means. Right now, TNA is all that he has right now. He needs to get out of this circus and come back with a clear mind. He may not owe it to the wrestling community, but he owns to the ones that care about him the most.
Finally, should he be stripped of the TNA World Championship? YES!! The fact that it did not happen after Hard Justice was shocking, but not at the same time. Sting is up there in age and Matt Morgan is not ready to be a World Champion at this time. Honestly the only person I could see win that World Title would be Hernandez or AJ Styles.
What would I have done if I booked the main event for Hard Justice? Well, Pillman in the chat reminded me that Kurt is innocent until proven guilty. I will take that road, yet concerned that the charges can put him down for a while. So with that, have the main event as is with Kurt Angle winning a bloody battle. The have the mafia tend to their ?Boss? and maybe stomp on Sting and Morgan some more. Then have Hernandez come in carrying that briefcase he won earlier. MEM escapes, but Scott Steiner (Mr. Hooked on Phonics) forgot to get Angle out of the ring.
In the back, TNA Originals are all attacking World Elite and start attacking the MEM and sending them to the back! Hernandez looks at Angle who is slowly getting up. He looks at his case and cashes it in. In about a couple minutes, Hernandez wins the World Title. He is getting pushed to do it, so let it happen now.
HEADLINE #2: EUGENE WENT ONE AND DONE
I feel bad for Nick Dinsmore here. I thought the best thing for him was either place him in FCW and work with the prospects there or work on ECW as a jobber to guys like Sheamus or Ezekiel Jackson. Even perhaps give him a push for a week or two as the Super Hero In Training with Hurricane Helms. They way the WWE handled him in my opinion is classless.
HEADLINE #3: TNA GAVE THE FANS A LITTLE HARD JUSTICE
I did not watch nor buy the pay per view, but from what I heard there were some bright spots. I was happy personally because I went 5-4 in my predictions and stayed above .500 overall. From what I read on Adam Martin’s report, the card was not terrible. There were some good matches and some bad ones. One thing I will say is if the fans who bought the PPV were happy, then I am happy. If they said it sucked, I will still be happy because I did not spend 30 dollars to watch it.
HEADLINE #4: DON WEST ?PROMOTED??
Ode To Don West (Limerick Form)
I am glad for the promotion of West
Now I don?t have to deal with the pest
His gut is too big
and he smells like a pig
Finally he does what he does best.
Or perhaps the Haiku of Don West:
TNA was right
To promote Don West to Sales
Ok, so those two were bad, but hey I give myself a Gold Star for trying. Perhaps you may want to create your own poem to Don West’s departure by e-mailing me at firstname.lastname@example.org. In case you may not know, Don West is no longer the color commentator for TNA. He is replaced by Taz (something I think I predicted 4 months ago).
Now Don West fans, he did not get fired from the company, he actually got a promotion to be running the sales department. I am honestly happy this happened. Sure, I never want to see a guy get fired outside of Michael Cole (my new whipping boy) and TNA did not fire West. I am ok with it because now it is my choice whether or not to see him on my computer or to hear him sell Jesse Neal sweatpants. In my case, I won?t listen to his extreme deals or whatever they are called. With that said, I don?t think I will hear Don West again unless I have the desire to watch Shop At Home.
But wait?didn?t I give him good grades the last few weeks? Yes, I did. But overall, Taz has the advantage based on his experience in the ring. Taz can tell a good story and worked alright with Joey Styles and Jim Ross (2 of the best in the business). Heck, Taz even had to work with Mike Adamle. For the most part, Taz carried the announcing in ECW during the Adamle Era.
This week, detentions go out to the following:
The Guy who steamrolled a child to get a DX glow stick – From one adult to another?get a life!
Whoever in WWE Creative is making Kane a terrorist – In all that is going on in the world, this storyline should never take place.
Brett Favre – He signed with the Vikings. Somewhere, John Madden is thinking about coming out of retirement so he can broadcast Vikings games. On Favre, he is a bigger diva than Celine Dion, Britney Spears, and Jessica Simpson all rolled into one. Matt O?Brien, I feel bad for you.
Abraham Washington – Students, he should not have talk show on ECW. I am just mentioning this so David Stephens can yell at me on his radio show.
Rob Terry – I agree with many on this, he is not a wrestler.
Sojo Bolt – She went from being a potential champion to being a victim to a returning Christy Hemme. And she was terrible in the ring!
Jesse Neal – I respect you for what you did for this great country. But dude, get a better hairstyle.
Vladimir Kozlov and Ezekiel Jackson – So THAT is what ended up happening. They one-up each other to win the heart of William Regal. How clever.
Michael Cole – Yes, He is THAT bad!
?Slap The Porpoise!? – Now apparently an ROH fan has a sign that say that?which reminds me?
The ROH fan that held a ?Slap The Porpoise? sign – Creative, Maybe. Funny, No! People like you will only make Hogewood want to do it more.
Degeneration X – What many a columnist stated, great in 1997?terrible in 2009.
Adam Martin – Yes, WV’s Editor-In-Chief because the chat room told me because of your 1-8 Hard Justice Record (enter Price Is Right loser music)
ETS and the Praxis Series – I just like to place them here.
Pittsburgh Pirates Ownership – This is our future?a 17-2 beatdown by Ryan Droste’s team.
To Any fan that pushes kids aside for a John Cena hat – You have been warned.
TNA Management – Your X Division Champ is fat with a P.P. on his face, your Knockout’s Champ is a guy that wears a mullet, your Legend’s Champ can?t bend over without his hamstring being pulled, your World Champ is facing serious allegations, and your president has no clue how to run a business. Well, at least Don West is out of the announce booth (though he was getting a whole lot better).
Kurt Angle – For my reasons under ?Headlines?.
Creators of the WWF Ice Cream Bars – Freddy Prinze Jr. reminded me of those. I remember how I was excited for the wrestling card more than the actual treat. It did taste like crap. If you ate more than one per day you would throw up! Yes class, it was that bad.
RAW Creative Team – Immediate Eternal Detention for giving Hornswoggle more victories over a two month span than Evan Bourne.
Vince Russo – I don?t know how much booking power you have, but seriously find a way to take the title off of Kurt Angle.
Vince McMahon – You released Nick Dinsmore because he was out of shape after just one match? Then explain to me why Big Daddy V lasted longer than one match?
Dixie Carter – Things are getting tougher for you now. You picked the side of evil and look where it can land TNA. I hope your dad has a lot of money to bail this disaster of a company.
MISTER V?S HONOR ROLL FOR THE WEEK OF AUGUST 8 – AUGUST 14, 2009 (Presented By: John Morrison because he is on here every week.)
ROH, TNA, and WWE must read my columns. They have to read my columns because after saying that wrestling was terrible last week, they all took it up a notch! I enjoyed many matches and some really surprised me. It was very difficult to pick a top three this week, but here it goes. I hope you all agree with this teacher, students.
Distinguished Honor Roll – CM Punk vs. John Morrison, Friday Night Smackdown, 8/14.
Overall, both these guys hit all their moves without any mistakes. It just seems that John Morrison adds another move to his wide array of moves each week. I have to tell the students this: John Morrison MUST win the World Title soon. The guy is getting a lot of cheers and I think the guy deserves it. He is still #1 in my Power Rankings. CM Punk is still #2 in my Power Rankings. He was strong from start to finish. I loved the ending to this match as well. It was booked perfectly and I hope to see more of these types of matches in the future.
High Honor Roll – AJ Styles vs. Matt Morgan, TNA Impact, 8/13
Matt Morgan needed this in a big way. Say what you want about the ?DNA of TNA?, but I think his stock is getting higher by the week. This match was surprisingly well-scripted and had a solid back and forth flow. After the outcome though, I worry about they way they are burying AJ Styles. It is reminding me now of MVP when he lost week after week. TNA, AJ is your guy for the fans to look up to. Give the guy his due and put the World Title on him.
Honor Roll – Goldust vs. Sheamus, WWE Superstars, 8/13
Please hear me out on this one. This was the best surprise match of 2009! . The wrestling in this match was crisp and they were tearing each other apart. Out of all these ?new? superstars, Tyson Kidd and Sheamus are the best individuals. Tyson Kidd has been on the Honor Roll before. This is Sheamus? first time. I expect more Honor Roll matches from both in the future.
Honorable Mention goes to (Graded C+ or higher): Jimmy Rave/Claudio Castagnoli vs. Brent Albright/Colt Cabana on 8/8; Silas Young vs. Delirious on 8/8; Davey Richards vs. El Generico on 8/8; Jack Swagger vs. Evan Bourne on 8/10; Zack Ryder vs. Shelton Benjamin on 8/11; William Regal vs. Tommy Dreamer on 8/11; John Morrison vs. DH Smith on 8/13; Doug Williams vs. Hernandez on 8/13; ODB vs. Tara vs. Angelina Love vs. Awesome Kong on 8/13; and Finlay vs. Dolph Ziggler on 8/14.
Worst Match of the Week – Christy Hemme vs. Sojo Bolt, TNA Impact, 8/13.
I usually give women’s matches the benefit of the doubt here, but this was almost as bad as Mickie vs. Gail Kim last Monday (more on that possibly next week). I don?t blame Hemme entirely for this, as she needed to shake the rust out with this match. Sojo Bolt was atrocious in this encounter, and there is the reason why she will never be a pro wrestling women’s champion.
Dishonorable Mention goes to (Graded C- or lower): Calgary Kid (Miz) vs. Eugene on 8/10; Hornswoggle/Mark Henry vs. Legacy on 8/10; Chris Jericho vs. John Cena on 8/10; Vladimir Kozlov vs. Kevin Brooks on 8/11; Paul Birchill vs. Yoshi Tatsu on 8/11; Tyler Reks vs. Tom James on 8/11; Scott Steiner vs. Brother Ray on 8/13; and JTG vs. Big Show on 8/14.
WEEKLY TV WARS
Well, Does Mr. Tedesco finally get his wish?will Superstars get one point? Let’s find out. For the sake of your reading pleasure, my students, I will do my best to shorten this portion.
Ring of Honor (August 8) – Out of all the segments, I only enjoyed a couple of them. Nigel McGuinness calling out Tyler Black was good. Davey Richards? promo looked real intense. Then there was the wresting, and this show was much better than last week’s. The tag match was actually not bad, but scores low because Jimmy Rave was not on that night. Young vs. Delirious had some decent transitions, but it was not a grade ?A? match. This was the first HDNet match for Mark Briscoe, and I think he was pretty good. Richards vs. Generico was pretty good, as it told the story of their continued feud. If it was just those four battling it out, it would be better. A bonus point goes to Sara Del Ray for kicking Bobby Dempsey around. Zero Points.
Monday Night Raw (August 10) – I did not like the return of DX this past week. I was actually thinking that this is what HBK would be doing if not for being involved with The Kliq all these years. Sgt. Slaughter as the guest host was not bad. I was surprised they did not promote GI Joe one time. His heel work in Canada was pretty humorous I thought. Don?t get me wrong, I love Canada. If I can land a teaching job there full time I would gladly accept it. But Sgt. Slaughter is a piece of the American Pie, well except when he was an Iraqi sympathizer in the early 1990s. Now the wrestling part of the show, I honestly did not like it. It was great to see Eugene, but a squash and a release was not right. All the matches were too quick, like they are focusing more on the guest host (which is ok if done right) and not putting emphasis on the in-ring product. Maybe the highlight for me was when Hornswoggle was put in his place by Ted DiBiase Jr. Sorry Vince, but this was not your best show this week. Zero Points.
ECW (August 11) – Stand Back, There’s a Hurricane coming through?
C?mon, it is the best TitanTron Ever!! I was thrilled to see him come back. After missing over a year due to neck problems, he clearly should be considered for Comeback Wrestler of the Year. Ok, that entire aside I really liked the show. Birchill confronting Helms, then Helms saves all around good guy Yoshi Tatsu. The Abraham Washington Show was good last week also, as Christian was the guest and they worked real well. As for the wrestling, it was average. Two squash matches in a one hour show is not a good thing. However, we were treated to a good Zack Ryder/Shelton match and the main event was on par for a Regal match. However, there are some other shows that deserve this award more. Zero Points.
WWE Superstars (August 13) – Ok, Ask The Divas is good for the dotcom world, but not on TV. This show had the best average when it came to the wrestling product. Morrison/Smith was very good and it was Smith’s best showing to date. Morrison always puts on a good show, too bad most of the WWE Universe are kids and do not appreciate the wonder that is John Morrison. Goldust and Sheamus really shocked me this past week. Just an amazing back and forth match with Goldust winning. The RAW portion as the main event? Eh, it was ok for what they gave us. I am worrying a bit about Kofi Kingston. Does he have any moves outside of being a Jumping Jelly Bean. He is more like an X Division Champion for TNA, not a U.S. Champion for the WWE. Carlito’s stock went up in this match. I liked his work in this match. The Divas were not bad. Rosa is improving, but still is not ready to wrestling with the top women in the WWE. Mickie James was decent, but really did not see much of her. Overall, the show might be the best show in this WWE Superstars series, and I will pick this as my second best show. Mike Tedesco, you got your wish! One Point from Mr. V.
TNA Impact (August 13) – Other than the first match, it was a pretty good show. The out-of-ring segments were well spoken and I thought had a purpose. Mike Foley crashing into a table by himself? Students, you wish you could do that and get paid as well! The only things I had a problem with in this show is Jesse Neal and Rhino. Do something with them, or get them off of TV. Most of the winners on the card needed the victories. Hemme won because she needed to be relevant again. Hernandez won so TNA can build him up to be the TNA original threat to the Title. Eric Young and Bashir won because World Elite need the victories. Scott Steiner won because, well I don?t have a reason for that. Tara needed a win so she can be a threat to Awesome Kong. Finally, Matt Morgan needed to be pushed. They had him beat a top three face (AJ) to be in the main event. Though he is not ready to be a World Champion, he is well on his way. I thought that TNA Impact was the best show going on this week because of all that was mentioned above. And five students voted as to which show was the best, and this show tied with Smackdown, so the students gave TNA a point as well. Two Points from Mr. V and One Point from the Students of Mr. V.
Friday Night Smackdown (August 14) – If this was a one hour show last Friday, then it would be the best. Then we got a diva’s match where one woman (Layla) could not keep up with the other (Melina). We had JTG, who beat one of the greats in Jericho, get squashed by Big Show. And though I liked seeing the Hart Dynasty beat Jeff Hardy in the main event, it was too quick and might have been too one sided. The good was seeing Finlay give Dolph Ziggler a nice moderate length match, which Dolph getting pushed to the moon in order to win the Intercontinental Championship. The Main Event was great. CM Punk finally gets one from John Morrison in what I thought was the match of the week. It is great to see a little feud like this on Cable TV rather than paying fifty bucks a pop to see them perform. The segments only had one nice spot, and that was CM Punk’s segment. He continues to excel in his mega-heel role and I think the fans giving him this severe heat is great for Punk. Kane’s Segments were inappropriate. I don?t care if Maria is dating Dolph Ziggler. Finally, Vince needs to stay off TV for a bit. Overall, I thought it was a good show the first hour, then really hit a roadblock the second hour. My students also picked this as the show of the week, so this show does get a point today. One Point from the students of Mr. V.
Remember students, this is your column as well!! Please e-mail me what you thought was the best show of the week by sending your pick to email@example.com. The most votes get one point in the standings and if there is a tie, then each show will get a point. Thanks to all who participate in this portion of my column.
1) Friday Night Smackdown (50 Points)
2) Monday Night Raw (33 Points)
3) TNA Impact (19 Points)
4) ECW (14 Points)
5) ROH on HDNet (7 Points)
6) WWE Superstars (1 Point)
COMMENTATOR REPORT CARD (Presented by JR’s Restaurant Bar-B-Q Sauce. TRY IT!!! Mr. V said so!!!!)
Once again, some random thoughts when I finalized their grades this past week:
1) Michael Cole continues to upset me, he was terrible yet again.
2) Jerry Lawler was better, but he really needs to help Cole out.
3) Josh Mathews did a good job calling play-by-play. He was clear and did not really stumble his words. A very good showing for him.
4) Matt Striker was great calling the main event, but only average throughout the show. His commentary on Superstars was perfect!
5) Todd Grisham is right now, the best play-by-play guy in professional wrestling. I thought I would never say that, but he was money last Friday.
6) Jim Ross is still awesome for reading my column. Other than that, his commentary blends well with Todd’s.
7) Mike Tenay needs some emotion. Maybe he will get it next week.
8) Don West, good bye and good luck.
9) Taz, welcome back to the commentator report card.
10) Mike Hogewood was better this past week, he called more moves this time around than he ever had before.
11) Dave Prazak is slumping a bit and I can?t point out why. Something is just missing with his commentary.
Michael Cole: F (2009 Grade: D-) **Defending winner of the Dunce Cap**
Jerry Lawler: C- (2009 Grade: C)
Josh Mathews: B- (2009 Grade: C+)
Matt Striker: B+ (2009 Grade: A-) **Currently on Dean’s List**
Todd Grisham: A- (2009 Grade: B+) **Currently on Dean’s List**
Jim Ross: A (2009 Grade: A) **Currently on Dean’s List**
Mike Tenay: C (2009 Grade: C+)
Don West: C+ (2009 Grade: C-) **Last week of for West, Taz starts next week**
Mike Hogewood: C+ (2009 Grade: C)
Dave Prazak: C (2009 Grade: B+) **Currently on Dean’s List**
MISTER V?S GOLD STAR SEGMENT
A lot of stars to award this week, I think I am going to need to buy some more here at Target for like 2 bucks or something.
Jose Marrero – He posted a very nice 8-1 record for Hard Justice. Great Job, Jose! He went up from 6th place two months ago to 2nd place now!
Joe Baiamonte – After sweating it out for a few PPVs, Joe posted a solid 7-2 record and exteneded his lead in Predictions From The Faculty.
VKingoftheWorldV, Austen Allen, and Ricky Langston – These three tied last weekend with a 6-3 Hard Justice Record. Well Done!!
John Morrison and CM Punk – They continue to entertain the crowds live and the viewers watching it on Hulu or whatever TV Network airs Smackdown.
Matt Morgan – For almost becoming a breakout star in TNA. Yes class, it does mean something.
AJ Styles – I will give you a gold star in defeat. Why? Well, because you don?t mind putting other wrestlers over you. You are truly a class act.
Goldust – He might be even better now than he was years ago when he was IC Champ.
Sheamus – You are well on your way to stardom. Great Job hanging with a veteran like Goldust.
Ted DiBiase, Jr. – For putting Hornswoggle in his place.
Mark Henry – For having the Crowd in the palm of your hand.
Mark Briscoe – Welcome Back to ROH!
Taz – Thank you for going to TNA to be a color commentator. I am sure that Mike Tenay’s prayers were answered last week.
Don West – Have fun with your promotion away from the announce desk.
Silas Young – In a losing effort to Delirious, I was real impressed with the in-ring work.
The fan that held a ?Korean Roast Beef? sign in from of Mickie James – That was funny
The fan in St. Louis that had a ?Vintage Cole? Sign – That was the best sign so far of 2009. Students, if you want to be noticed in my column make a sign like that.
Whoever created the game above (if you don?t get this picture, e-mail me and I will forward you the picture) – Cole Bingo is Brilliant! Maybe we will play that in the chatroom on a Monday.
Well, that about wraps this long column up. Finally, a couple announcements before the end of the week for Mr. V.
CURRENT STANDING FOR PREDICTIONS OF THE FACULTY
1) Joe Baiamonte (Baiamonte’s Casa)???????????..?66-42 (7-2)
2) Jose Marrero (Wrestling Rumblings)???????????…61-47 (8-1)
3) Josh Boutwell (Viva La Raza! and TNA Recapper)??..?.60-48 (3-6)
4) WrestleView Students (Our loyal readers)???????.?.60-48 (5-4)
5) David Stephens (That’s a Wrap! and ECW Recapper)??58-50 (3-6)
6) Anthony Valvo (From the Desk of Mr. V.)???????..?55-53 (5-4)
7) Matt O?Brien (Notes from the Nosebleeds)???????.?54-39 (5-4)
8) Josh Piedra (The Shoot)??????????????????…52-36 (6-3)
9) Phil Chroniger (On Second Thought?)??????????..51-45 (5-4)
10) Mike Siciliano (Pro’s From the Palace)??????????..48-34 (5-4)
11) Chris Kelly (Ex-TNA Epics Recapper)????????..?..?35-23 (4-5)
12) Sean Hurley (The Sharpshooter)?????????????…35-26 (7-2)
13) Doug Lackey (Reality From Ringside)??????????.?35-38 (4-5)
14) Mike Tedesco (WWE S.S. and Smackdown Recapper)??14-9 (0-0)
15) Mike Klubnik (Stylin? and Profilin?)?????????????..14-12 (5-4)
16) Ryan Droste (Ask WV)???????????????????….4-4 (0-0)
Standings as of TNA’s Hard Justice (Hard Justice Picks in Parentheses)
Fans averaged 5.3 wins this PPV, so their record is 5-4
– FROM MR. V #28
A couple weeks ago, Mr. V hosted a Trade Deadline column that featured three WrestleView staff members pretending that they were the GMs for a wrestling promotion. We also had one staff member as an Insider. Overall, the students of WrestleView thought it was a success. I want to ask you two questions about this column, which you can find at this link:
1) Which trade would YOU like to see happen in real life?
2) Which team (WWE, TNA, or ROH) do you think claimed victory? Why did you choose the way you did?
Due: August 27, 2009
Well students, congratulations!!! You read over 7,500 words of wrestling material in one night! If you read all this in one night, I will definitely give you a gold star. You have to e-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org in order to receive it. Also, share with me your thoughts this week. Also, if you want a rule posted, next week is the FINAL WEEK to do so.
Well, that does it for another week of From The Desk of Mr. V! No need to push your chairs back in, I am sure you are tired after reading my rants all day. I will clean up the mess. I hope to heck it is still daylight outside after you read it all. I hope you enjoy final week of summer vacation. I know I will, thanks to the autobiography of Bob Barker that I just can?t wait to start reading. Until our unveiling of the Student Choice Awards or Predictions From The Faculty, you are officially??DISMISSED!!!!
Facebook: Under Anthony J. Valvo from the Pittsburgh, PA Network
**Mr. V does not do MySpace nor Twitter**
If not for the students, there would be no Mr. V. Thank you all for reading this week.