Are you ready? Then stop questioning your heart and join me, because it’s time for the ECW on Sci-Fi!
We start off with a shot of Jack and Christian in the back with Tiffany. She announces that tonight is the return of the Peep show with Jack Swagger as Christian’s guest! She says that no subject is off limits but warns them against physical contact. Tiffany wants both men to be in great condition for their match at Judgment Day, which she believes has the potential to steal the show.
Mark Henry w/ Tony Atlas v. Tommy Dreamer
The match starts off with Tommy attempting to speed around Henry to take out his legs, but the big man quickly throws him out of the ring. Dreamer scales the turnbuckle and hits a single armed axe-handle. Henry shrugs it off and puts Dreamer down on the mat in a chin lock. Dreamer uses a jawbreaker to escape the behemoth’s grip. This only serves to anger the beast as Mark Henry uses a series of headbutts to try and get the pin. Dreamer kicks out.
Henry throws Dreamer into the corner and follows up with yet another headbutt. Henry attempts a splash but Dreamer sluggishly blocks with a kick to the gut. Dreamer attempts to leap from the second turnbuckle but Henry catches him in a bear hug and then throws him to the mat. Dreamer is on his back and Henry attempts to drop down splash style, but Dreamer moves out of the way. Henry is down for the first time and Dreamer bounces off the ropes and hits an elbow drop. Dreamer goes for the pin but Henry kicks out.
Henry struggles to crawl over to the corner. Dreamer is hulking up and plants a dropkick to Henry’s gut. Dreamer follows this up with a DDT and a pin, but Henry kicks out! Mark is pretty angry right about now and is able to get to his feet. Dreamer foolishly attempts a schoolboy roll-up, which Henry counters by dropping the full weight of his body down onto Dreamer’s arm. Henry follows up with a very sharp looking World’s Strongest Slam. This is all over.
Winner via World’s Strongest Slam: Mark Henry
In the back Gregory Helms is interviewing Natalya and Tyson Kidd. They are once again putting over Tyson’s Hart Dungeon training as well as his upcoming match this evening. Helms invites Natalya to stay in the back and watch the match with him. Her response is to scoff and walk away. Helms leaves us with a ?what’s up wit dat?? as we head to commercial.
Finlay v. Tyson Kidd
Why is there a tear in my eye? *sigh* because there is no Hornswoggle accompanying his dad to the ring. I actually messaged Tyson Kidd to express my appreciation of the match last time these two wrestled, here’s to hoping they can recapture that magic! Natalya has been banned from ringside.
The two start things off with a very aggressive lock up. They go between corners and it seems as though Tyson may have the upper hand, but Finlay is able to work him down to the mat. Wow, this match is moving with incredible pace and energy; I?m doing everything I can to keep up. Each man goes for a series of kicks, punches, and submissions but they keep rolling around and countering with impressive speed. Finlay is able to trap Tyson Kidd’s head which he follows up with an elbow to Tyson Kidd’s face. Tyson uses his speed to trap Finlay’s leg. Tyson is twisting and grinding Finlay’s leg. Perhaps out of fear of a repeat from their last performance, Finlay does everything he can to get Tyson off him. Finlay is able to use his strength to flip Kidd over and break free.
Finlay rolls to the outside of the ring. Tyson attempts to baseball slide the Irishman, but Finlay pulls back the ring apron and begins battering Kidd’s back with his forearms. Finlay goes up to the apron and jumps down on Kidd following a series of kicks. Tyson is able to get a momentary reprieve as he dropkicks Finlay shoulder first into the steel steps.
This match is hot and we are going to back after this commercial!
We are back and Finlay is in the middle of the ring with Tyson using a very painful arm lock. It looks as though Tyson will be working the arm and shoulder that Finlay had thrashed against the steel steps. This is honestly painful to watch. Tyson seems to have a never ending repertoire of submission moves which he switches between frequently. Finlay is able to get his head out from under Tyson’s knee. Finlay almost gets to his feet, but Tyson drops down to the mat wrenching on Finlay’s arm. Finlay whips Tyson into the corner. He then grabs Kidd’s arm and pulls him off of the turnbuckle. Finlay follows this up with a couple of very stiff clotheslines.
Finlay is able to get Tyson up on his shoulders and hits an inverted Samoan drop. Tyson may be in trouble. Kidd kicks out of the pin attempt. Finlay lifts Tyson up again and looks to go for the Celtic Cross. Out of nowhere a rather large man comes steamrolling into the ring and introduces his boot to Finlay’s face. The camera zooms out and it is DH Smith! David Hart Smith makes his ECW debut! DH is the son of Davey Boy Smith, for those unaware.
DH backs Finlay into the corner and Tyson comes into the ring with the Irish Foreign Object which he drives into the back of Finlay’s leg. Natalya has now also made her way down to the ring. Tyson is liberally applying the IFO to Finlay’s back. Smith lifts Finlay up and Tyson bounces off the ropes? could it be? Yes! They hit the Hart Attack made famous by Bret Hart and Natalya’s father during their time in the Hart Foundation. The NEW Hart Foundation is on ECW!
RAW Rebound featuring the Orton/Batista drama
In the back Zach Ryder is with Tiffany asking if he can go to the gym. Tiffany says that he can go. Paul Burchill and Katie Lea walk up to the GM. Burchill seems a bit peeved that he isn?t on the show this week, and wasn?t last week either. He walks away and Katie Lea tells Tiffany that when Burchill has too much time on his hands he tends to get into trouble.
We are treated to a video package of Kozlov training in a gym. I am 100% confident that Zach Ryder did not leave to go do this workout. The Russian monster is insane and more athletic than I previously thought. Is he winning me over? Curse you ECW!
Kozlov v. Chad Collyer
Chad was apparently an alternate on the US Grappling team. Kozlov seems to quite frankly not care in the slightest about Collyer’s background. He is just trashing Chad with punches, kicks and slams. Chad goes to the second turnbuckle and leaps for a crossbody. Kozlov doesn?t catch him; instead he just swats him away. Striker lets us know that Putin is a big fan of Kozlov and takes a shot at ?our current communist President?. Kozlov hits a spinebuster and this match is over.
Winner via Spine Buster: Kozlov
Following the match Josh Matthews is in the ring and allows Kozlov the chance to speak. I really have no idea what he said. I?m pretty sure it was something about destroying people and being awesome. That sounds about right.
The Peep Show
After a four year absence, Christian is hosting the Peep Show once again on WWE TV! He introduces his guest, the All-American American himself. Christian welcomes Swagger and Jack says ?this is so stupid?. Christian says that people are going to start thinking he is a sore loser if he keeps acting like that instead of his usual quality of just BEING a loser. Swagger says that he brought a clip to the show with him. We see video of Christian exposing the turnbuckle to get the victory at Backlash.
Swagger asks Christian what he has to say for himself. 1st Christian says thanks for reminding everyone that he beat Swagger for the Title. 2nd he left out the part where Swagger exposed the other turnbuckle to try and use against Christian. Christian shows as a montage of? wait for it? Swagger’s lisp!
Can we stop for a second here and reflect upon the brilliance of this montage?
Alright I?m back. Swagger angrily asks ?what does that prove?? Christian says ?nothing, I just enjoy making you look stupid?. Jack says that none of that matters because six months from now Christian will have no Peeps or ECW Championship. Christian begins to talk but Swagger cuts him off. Jack gloats about the fact that Christian can?t hit him because Tiffany explicitly stated that there was to be no physicality during Christian’s show. Christian says that the great part of being a host is that he can say when the show is over. Christian lands a punch squarely in Swagger’s face! Jack rolls out of the ring and Christian holds his ECW Title as we go off the air.
Opening match was a decent showing by both Mark Henry and Dreamer. For a second there I thought that Dreamer might have it with the DDT finisher. I?m a fan of the fact that Henry put his foot on the rope instead of getting his shoulder up. After getting hit with a freakin? DDT to the head he SHOULDN?T be able to get his shoulder up, so props to them on that one. My only complaint is that I really feel as though the WWE has dropped the ball on the whole Dreamer retirement arc. For those not keeping track, June 6th is just a few weeks away and Tommy is nowhere near being next in line for the Title shot. I won?t be surprised if they extend his contract by a day and give him a Title shot at One Night Stand (or Extreme Rules whatever they are calling the PPV now). This could be a nice farewell match, but who knows what goes on inside the head of a WWE booker.
I want Tiffany to stay GM. I honestly can?t back this up in any way, it’s just a feeling in my? gut. In all seriousness though, either I?m in a really good mood because I?m done with Finals, or she is starting to grow on me. I?m willing to give her some more time to develop. I have heard conjectures that perhaps Dreamer could sign a new contract and stay on as the GM, but I don?t really have a preference either way on that. The truth is that Tiffany’s make it or break it moment is going to come the next time ECW is on near a holiday. Theodore Long’s costumes and outfits honestly got me through the week. Though as far as I?m concerned nothing will ever top Mark Henry as the World’s Strongest Santa with Tony Atlas as Rudolph, seriously YouTube it, BEST PROMO EVER.
Tyson v. Finlay. What can I say that I didn?t already say when these two last fought? This was another absolutely brilliant performance. I really think that these two are at their best when they face each other. The opening series of holds, reversals, and strikes put Indy chain wrestling to shame. The two worked an incredibly stiff and aggressive match that really had the ?wow? factor that audiences and performers alike crave. Finlay wrestles like a man half his age, and Tyson despite his short time in the WWE works on just as high of a level. I really hope this feud continues as these two each have a match between them. I think what it is going to come down to is whether there is away for Finlay to continue to work a program against a guy in a stable or whether they have to go a different direction. Which brings me to ?
The NEW Hart Foundation. This is a moment that I know a lot of fans have been waiting for since the Draft occurred. Props to Tiffany for having the foresight to draft DH Smith during the supplemental (let me have my moment of suspended disbelief). DH is huge! I do not know him on a personal level (though he, Tyson and I are all Facebook friends) but he did have troubles with the wellness policy in the past. Some have speculated that he was only brought up to the roster at that point in order to be a sacrificial lamb for the WWE and the initiation of said plan. I?m not going to get involved in such gossip but the bottom line is that I have great hopes for the stable. I think the right move would be to build them up before introducing them to a Tag Title hunt, but we?ll just have to wait and see.
Oh Kozlov. Ladies and Gentlemen I think that the ECW ?curse? is once again taking hold of me. Just as happened in the case of Mark Henry, they have managed to take a character that I truly did not enjoy and are winning me over. I?m not going to come out and forthright jump on the Kozlov mark wagon, but boy am I close. I don?t know if it is his dominating style or the promos that I can?t understand but something is really working. Did you see that workout he was doing in the video package? Insanity.
Tonight we were privileged to the return of the Peep Show. Honestly I?m almost surprised that it took this long for the WWE to bring it back, but no complaints and it didn?t disappoint. Seriously that lisp montage was one of the best montages I?ve seen in awhile. Actually, I take that back. The montage at the end of Scrubs last week during the finale was off the charts, but this one still rocked. I don?t? know but if you ask me there is just little interest in watching the show next season. I mean come on without JD what is the point? I?m going to be fair and give it a week or two, but my hopes are not high. What am I talking about? Kozlov? No. Oh I remember, Christian!
Alright back on track. I really wish that after Swagger had shown the video of Christian removing the turnbuckle cover to cheaply win the match that Christian would have gone a little bit farther back in Swagger’s past than just the example of him also removing the turnbuckle in that match. For those of you that do not remember, when Swagger won the ECW Title he removed a turnbuckle cover and hit Hardy’s head into to knock him into a daze. I would have liked it if Christian showed video of that and said something clich? like ?payback’s a bitch?. In all fairness to Christian that was before he was on ECW so it probably wasn?t on his mind.
Nonetheless I am looking forward to their match at Judgment Day. I?m hoping that Swagger can continue to put on solid PPV performances so that creative has more confidence in his work ability for the ?big shows?. Christian will undoubtedly give it all and not disappoint, so let’s try to steal the show!
3 Month Rolling Rankings; ECW Title Win 5, ECW Title Loss 4, ECW Win 3, ECW Loss 2, ECW Appearance 1, PPV Title Win 10, PPV Title Loss 8, PPV Win 6, PPV Loss 4, PPV Appearance 2.
No Way Out 2009 ? May 12th 2009
1. Christian ? 46 pts. [l.w. 1]
2. Jack Swagger ? 38 pts. [l.w. 2]
3. Finlay ? 35 pts. [l.w. 3]
4. Tommy Dreamer ? 25 pts. [l.w. 4]
5. Paul Burchill ? 15 pts. [l.w. 5]
6. Tyson Kidd ? 22 pts. [l.w. 6]
7. Natalya ? 18 pts. [l.w. 7]
8. Evan Bourne ? 15 pts. [l.w. 8]
9. Tony Atlas ? 8 pts. [l.w. 9]
10. Katie Lea ? 7 pts. [l.w. 9]
10. Kozlov ? 7 pts. [l.w. NA]
10. DJ Gabriel ? 7 pts. [l.w. NA]
Look for ?That’s a Wrap? on WrestleView Wednesday!
So that’s ECW?. Love it? Hate it? Disagree with everything I said? Just want to chat wrestling? I?m always up for reading your thoughts so send them over to me at email@example.com
– David Stephens