Are you ready? Then stop questioning your heart and join me because it is time for Monday Night RAW!!!
Randy Orton is out in the ring to celebrate his win as the NEW WWE Champion! Before he can fill his promo with excessive bravado, Sheamus’ music hits. The Celtic Warrior comes down to the ring with microphone in hand. Sheamus claims that both times he lost the WWE Title, it was actually stolen from him. First in an Elimination Chamber, and then last night in the Six Pack Challenge. Sheamus says that it is pathetic.
Orton retorts that given the circumstances in which Sheamus won the Title (interference from Nexus), the only thing pathetic is Sheamus. Undaunted, the former Champion demands to have a rematch. Orton says that if Sheamus keeps up this harassment, then it won’t be a rematch he receives, but a punt to the skull. Sheamus says that he isn’t scared, instead he is going to kick Orton’s head off. Orton dares him to try.
And I quote…
Randy Orton & Sheamus will have their Championship Match. When it is over there will be no question as to who is the champion. That is because their match will have NO DQ and No excuses. In just two weeks, Sheamus will face Orton inside Hell-in-a-Cell.
Sheamus admits that he has never been in that type of match, but given what he did to HHH, he has no fear. The last thing that Sheamus wants before he goes, is his gold. Orton is baffled. Sheamus tells him not to play dumb, clearly he is talking about the WWE Championship. Sheamus says that if Orton is an honorable man, he will turn over the Title. If Orton is able to beat Sheamus in Hell-in-a-Cell, then Sheamus will hand over the Title.
Orton says that Sheamus’ first mistake was assuming that he was an honorable man. Hell, Orton says that he would punt his own grandmother in the face if it meant winning the Title. Orton says that if Sheamus really wants the Title that bad, he can go ahead and take it.
Orton holds the Title out in front of him, and throws down his mic. Sheamus starts to make a move towards the Title. Orton grabs him and hits with an RKO! Orton poses to the crowd, holding up his Title in the air. Orton leaves the ring and starts to head towards the ramp. Orton pauses and then slides back into the ring. Orton backs himself into the corner and begins to stare down his prey. Sheamus gets to his knees, and Orton vaults himself across the ring. Sheamus slides out just in time to escape the impending punt.
Back from the break, The Hart Dynasty is sitting ringside joining in on commentary following their Title loss last night at Night of Champions to the eventual winners, Cody Rhodes & Drew McIntyre.
Cody Rhodes & Drew McIntyre v. Vladimir Kozlov & Santino
Santino and Cody are the first two in the ring. Santino rolls onto the floor and attempts to drag down Rhodes. Instead, Rhodes punches him in the face and tags in McIntyre. Santino retreats to his corner and tags in Kozlov.
Kozlov takes right after McIntyre, and locks him in a front headlock. Kozlov tags in Santino. Santino hits and arm drag, and then starts to pump up the Cobra. Rhodes kicks him in the face, and then goes for a pin. Santino kicks out.
McIntyre heads back over to Rhodes and drags Santino into the corner. Rhodes comes into the ring and hits a running knee. McIntyre is once again tagged into the match. McIntyre goes right after the head of Santino. He stomps on it with his boot, and then tags back in his opponent. Rhodes loses his grasp for only a second, but it is enough for Santino to tag in Kozlov.
The Russian comes into the ring and immediately hits a Spinebuster on McIntyre. Rhodes and Santino both run into the ring at each other. Rhodes throws Santino out of the ring. Kozlov nails Rhodes with a boot that sends him to the outside of the ring. This is enough of a distraction for McIntyre to kick Kozlov in the gut. McIntyre hits the Future Shock, and this match is over.
Winners via Future Shock: Cody Rhodes & Drew McIntyre
Morrison is in the back, warming up with some Parkour.
In the back, Edge is with Zack Ryder. Ryder decides to teach Edge how to fist pump. (Snooki would be so proud) Edge says that no matter what Ryder thinks, they are just not friends. Edge starts to get frustrated and complaining about losing the match last night.
Daniel Bryan comes into the shot, with a book in hand. He asks if they wouldn’t mind keeping down the noise. Edge is not very pleased by the interruption. Ryder says that Bryan is a loser for asking them to quiet down so that he can read. He tries to go for a high five with Edge, but Edge denies him. Edge says that Bryan picked the wrong night to get on his bad side because he wants to hurt someone. Edge challenges Bryan to a match tonight, Bryan accepts.
Chris Jericho v. John Morrison
Morrison charges at Jericho and connects with a series of fists. Jericho is whipped into the ropes, and then slides outside the ring. Morrison follows after, eventually chasing Jericho back into the ring. Morrison connects with a spinning wheel kick. Morrison whips Jericho into the corner so hard, that Jericho flies to the outside of the ring. Morrison charges after and leaps over the turnbuckle to hits Jericho on the outside!
Back on RAW, Morrison is in control. Jericho turns the pace around with an Enziguiri to the back of the head. Jericho bounces off the ropes, and knocks Morrison to the outside. Jericho takes a moment to stretch, and then heads out after Morrison. Jericho lifts him into the air, dropping Morrison gut first onto the barricade. Jericho slides into the ring, and lets the referee begin his 10 count.
Jericho waits for Morrison to reach the apron, and then suplexes him back into the ring. Jericho connects with a back slam, and then goes for the cover. Morrison kicks out. A kick from Morrison sends Jericho to the mat, but it is only for a brief moment as Jericho gets to his feet and hits a dropkick. Jericho sets Morrison up on the second the rope, and then stands on his shoulders to apply pressure to the neck.
Jericho is looking for the cover, but Morrison attempts a quick roll up! Jericho kicks out. Morrison is now struggling for air as Jericho locks on a headlock. Morrison escapes the hold, and gets to his feet. Jericho chops him for his troubles. Morrison is able to spring back and connects with a strong kick. He whips Jericho into the corner, but Jericho dodges the splash attempt, and hits a running bulldog. Jericho goes for the Lionsault, but Morrison dodges. Morrison attempts to springboard into his signature wheel kick, but Jericho catches him and puts him into the Walls of Jericho!
Morrison just barely reaches the bottom rope, within mere moments of succumbing to the submission maneuver. Jericho charges after him, but gets caught with a slippy kick. This sets Jericho up on the mat, as Morrison eyes the turnbuckle. Morrison takes to flight and connects from the top rope with Starship Pain. This match is over.
Winner via Starship Pain: John Morrison
After the match, Jericho is very slow in leaving the ring. He has a frustrated look on his face as he heads to the back.
John Cena is in the back with Josh Mathews. Cena reaffirms his role as the destructor of the Nexus. He says that after tonight, and his match against Wade Barret, the leader will fall. The winds of change will be no more.
The Miz’s music hits, and he makes his way down to the ring. The Miz claims that he did not tap out. Daniel Bryan did not win. What the fans don’t know is that yesterday when the Miz woke up, he was suffering a tender medialcolamical injury. Or something like that.
Miz says that he faced the possibility of surgery, so he had to be cautious. Miz says that he can and he will regain his US Championship. “Because I’m The Miz, and I… did not tap out.”
Edge v. Daniel Bryan
Daniel Bryan’s generic rock music has been replaced by “Ride of the Valkyries”. Seriously.
The match starts with Edge being sent to the ground and pummeled by the boots of Daniel Bryan. Edge knocks Bryan into the middle rope, and then slams into him with a bronco buster variant. Edge flings Bryan to the outside of the ring. On the outside, Bryan becomes friends with the barricade as Edge throws into the barricade.
Both men are now back into the ring, as Bryan attempts to battle back with a punch. Edge grabs him and hits a front facing bulldog. Edge goes down to the mat and locks on a rear choke. Bryan is able to get to his feet, and dodges a clothesline. Bryan hits Edge a knee. Edge whips Bryan into the corner, but Bryan flips and jumps out of the way. Bryan connects with a clothesline and goes for the cover. Edge kicks out.
Bryan heads all the way to the top rope, and leaps for a crossbody. Edge kicks him in the gut while in midair. Edge is sizing up the young superstar, looking for the spear. Edge goes for the spear, but Bryan counters, and locks in the LeBell lock!
Alex Riley (who has signed a personal contract with Miz) runs down to ringside, and distracts the referee. Miz sneaks up from behind, and slams the back of Bryan’s head against the top rope. Edge follows up with a spear, and this match is over.
Winner via Spear: Edge
The General Manager is reversing the decision of the referee. Due to the interference, Daniel Bryan is the winner.
Edge grabs the microphone and begins to rant on the mysterious General Manager. Edge says that this isn’t a joke, this is his career. Edge heads up the ramp.
Bryan is now alone in the ring with The Miz & Alex Riley. Miz kicks him in the gut, and then Riley connects with a kick. Miz bounces off the ropes and drives his boot into Bryan’s face. Their onslaught continues as Bryan is helpless. Miz has Riley hold back Bryan, as Miz begins to taunt him, and slap him across the face. This continues for at least two minutes, as Miz is getting out all of his frustration. Miz yells at Bryan that he isn’t really the Champion. Miz finally takes Bryan from Riley, and hits the Skull Crushing Finale. A very cocky Miz heads to the back as the crowd chants, “You Tapped Out.”
Unified Womens Title
Melina v. Layla
Melina goes right after the Champion, hitting her with a series of punches. Layla meets her with a kick to the gut, and then throws her to the outside. Michelle is on commentary for this match. Melina gets to her feet, and plants Layla down to the ground. Melina takes a look a Michelle and then charges after her. Michelle is forced to hop behind the barricade to avoid Melina.
Back in the ring, Melina lifts up Layla and places her on the otp turnbuckle. Layla flips up into the air and connects with a nifty DDT/Stunner move. This match is over.
Winner via Whatever-that-Move-is-Called: Layla
In the back Josh Mathews is with Chris Jericho. Jericho is not there to talk about his match against Morrison, but instead… his new DVD! Jericho says that his DVD should be in the Smithsonian. Jericho says that he does not point it out to rest of his laurels, but instead because it shows that despite what happened in the past, he will go on to do great things. Jericho also says that he found out the IP Address of Michael Cole’s computer. As a result, he is close to finding out the identity of the GM. So, he will use that information to sabotage and run RAW. Jericho calls on the GM to make a Title match for him against Orton. Walking into the shot, Orton accepts the challenge. He says that he is sick of hearing Jericho’s voice. If Jericho can beat him, then he will get a Title shot after Sheamus, if Orton wins, then he will do everything in his power to have Jericho kicked off the show.
R-Truth & Eve v. Ted Dibiase Jr. & Maryse
Truth and Dibiase are the first to square off. Truth begins by getting the crowd to participate in some “Wassup” chants. Truth connects with a spinning leg kick. Dibiase tags in Maryse. Truth doesn’t immediately leave the ring, and instead tries to impress Maryse with some dancing. Maryse doesn’t appreciate it, and slaps him in the face.
Eve comes screaming into the ring, and connects with a spear. Maryse gets to her feet and tries for a huge kick. The move misses, and Eve instead connects with a kick of her own. Eve follows up with a running Senton. Dibiase runs in to break the cover, but Truth flings him to the outside. Truth slingshots himself outside the ring and takes out Dibiase with a crossbody. Maryse attempts her finisher on Eve, but Eve hits her instead! This match is over.
Winners: R-Truth & Eve
After the match, Maryse and Dibiase are arguing at ringside.
I graphic plays on the screen which says, “I will have you”. Everyone is baffled, including Dibiase & Maryse.
John Cena v. Wade Barret w/ Nexus
Before the match, Wade jumps on top of the commentary booth. Wade says that because Cena wants to pick apart the Nexus one by one, there has been a change of plans. Barret believes Cena is a man of his word, so this will be a gauntlet match. If Cena can beat Tarver, Gabriel, Otunga and Slater; THEN he can face Barret.
There is no fooling around as Cena immediately hits a side slam and goes for a cover. Slater kicks out. Slater is whipped to the corner, but dodges a splash. Slater connects with some fists and kicks, and then charges at Cena connecting with a running forearm. Slater leaps again to hit a dropkick, and goes for the pin. Cena kicks out. Slater hits a neckbreaker and goes for another cover. Cena kicks out.
Slater has the head of Cena and is hitting it over and over again with punches. Cena bounces off the ropes, and gets lifted into the air by Slater and driven face first into the mat. Cena kicks out of the cover. Slater heads to the top turnbuckle, and leaps for a crossbody. The move hits, but Cena rolls through and lifts Slater off the mat. Cena hits the Attitude Adjustment, and Slater has been eliminated!
Otunga kept control during the commercial break. Cena is able to counter a kick. He turns it into a small package and sneakily eliminates Otunga.
Tarver runs at Cena like a rabid dog. He knocks Cena into the corner, and pounds him with a slew of punches. Cena pushes back and locks on the STF. Tarver is eliminated.
Gabriel comes into the ring and hits a quick spin kick. Gabriel follows with another and then heads to the apron. Gabriel slingshots into the ring and hits a senton. Gabriel goes for the cover, but Cena kicks out. Cena gets to his feet and hits a dropkick on Gabriel!
Cena heads to the turnbuckle and begins to climb the ropes. Gabriel follows after him, and connects with a Superplex. Gabriel goes for a cover, but Cena kicks out. Gabriel hits a beautiful springboard moonsault from the top rope! Cover, but Cena kicks out.
Cena is struggling to get to feet. Cena crawls over to Gabriel. Gabriel tries for a suplex, but Cena reverses into one of his own. Cena goes for the cover, but Gabriel kicks out. Gabriel and Cena proceed to exchange a series of blows back and forth. Gabriel trips Cena and tries for a cover. Cena kicks out. Gabriel sees that Cena is in the corner, so he follows after and connects with a splash. Gabriel springboards into the ring, but Cena dodges the crossbody!
Cena bounces off the ropes and hits a shoulder block. Cena hits another, and then connects with the 5 Knuckle Shuffle! Cena lifts Gabriel into the air for the Attitude Adjustment, but something catches his eye. Cena drops Gabriel as the entirety of Nexus comes into the ring. Barret brings in a chair and they all attempt to jump Cena. The ensuing struggle results in Cena grabbing the chair, and chasing Nexus out of the ring.
Cena grabs a mic, and says that Wade owes him. Barret needs to step into the ring right now, so that they can end this all. Barret says that if he is going to agree, then he is going to need something in exchange. Cena says that Barret needs just name it. Barret stipulates that if he beats Cena, then Cena must become a member of the Nexus. No ifs, ands, buts, or maybes. Barret proposes that the match takes place in two weeks, at Hell-in-a-Cell. Cena says that he will not back down from a fight, so he accepts. BUT, if this is going to be a big match, then they are going to make it a big match. If Cena wins, then Nexus is done. Forever. Barret accepts.
I don’t have all that much by way of thoughts for tonight’s edition of RAW. It was kind of bizarre at moments. Last week was bizarre in a good way, tonight was bizarre in a “what exactly did I watch” kind of way.
I have to say that I am generally a Michael Cole fan, but he really got on my nerves tonight during the segment with The Hart Dynasty. Cole was burying the team, but not in an effective heel way. He was acting like a fifth grader making fun of someone on the playground. I expect better.
The best part of the tag match was seeing the smile on Kozlov’s face. I don’t know why, but it makes me happy.
The Miz had an intense segment with Bryan after the match with Edge. Bryan was absolutely pulverized and destroyed. It was a beat down that was a homage the great heel personas of the past. There was just no way to watch it unfold with at least feeling some form of anger, annoyance, or excitement. I’m glad that this particular feud is not quite wrapped. It allows The Miz to have the briefcase in his pocket, yet still take pride in what he considers “his” Title.
The Jericho storyline is becoming very intriguing. Each week we are teased that this could be his last week, yet he somehow either prevails or continues to wiggle himself onto the TV. His match against Morrison has one really cool moment that I’ve never seen it before. That vault over the turnbuckle was pretty unique. Well done, and credit to Jericho for continuing to make his opponents look strong.
Melina v. Layla did nothing for me, sorry.
Truth’s new theme sucks. There I said it. I’ve listened to it a bunch, and tried to get into it, but I just can’t. The background is way to heavy on that song. There is just not the same great tag as his previous theme song which would allow the crowd to sing along. I don’t see it lasting more than a year.
The “I Will Have You” graphic during the Dibiase/Maryse argument was fantastic. Well, it was either really fantastic or horrendously dumb. I’m going to go with fantastic and brilliant because Maryse is really attractive. So… any storyline involving her means I get to see her on TV that much more. (I swear I do have SOME journalistic integrity)
More Zack Ryder this week, and yet still no “Oh Radio”. Seriously, let’s fix that, ok?
It’s good to see the mysterious GM angle progressing. Both Edge & Jericho kept their stance on discovering his identity. The day of the great reveal may be getting closer. I hope it’s Hornswoggle.
I wasn’t a big fan of the main event tonight. Having the Nexus compete in a gauntlet match seems like a questionable idea. What was the point in forming the Summerslam team, and all that hassle, if Cena could just defeat them all anyway?
Ultimately, the segment was saved by a very strong promo from Cena to end the show. Will this be the end of the Nexus? Will Cena join the Nexus? I’m trying to imagine both storylines in my head. I have to admit that it’s a very tough choice.
I do read every single e-mail you guys send, and really appreciate hearing your thoughts. Send me some e-mails, and have a safe week everyone!
So that’s RAW…. Love it? Hate it? Disagree with everything I said? Just want to chat wrestling? I’m always up for reading your thoughts and do my absolute best to reply to every message I get. Send them over to me at firstname.lastname@example.org. (there were a lot of great ones that I didn’t get a chance to respond to this past week, and I hope to reply to them this week so sorry if you were one of them!)
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