“Yes, sir, we promised you a great main event…” The WWE video leads us into the show.
The Smackdown video plays and we’re brought into the arena with some pyro. Todd Grisham and Matt Striker welcome us to the show, just five days after WrestleMania XXVI.
Tony Chimel introduces the World Heavyweight Champion Chris Jericho, who walks to the ring with a chorus of boos. They show some stills from the match against Edge at WrestleMania. Jericho hit Edge in the head and hit the Codebreaker to retain. Following the match Edge speared Jericho through the timekeeper’s wall.
Jericho stands in the ring with a scowl on. Jericho then gloats that he is still the World Heavyweight Champion and the crowd does not like that. Jericho says he’s the best in the world at what he does. Jericho said last week that he was genetically superior to everyone and he was right. Last Sunday at WrestleMania he wrestled a perfect match and proved that he is the greatest champion of this generation or any other. He dismantled Edge piece by piece and stayed World Heavyweight Champion. Jericho then looks angry and says after the match Edge tried to permanently injure him by spearing him through the barricades. As he was lying in a mangled heap, an innocent victim, all he heard was 70,000 hypocrites chanting “Spear.” Jericho realized why: because we’re all the same as Edge. We’ve never been successes nor reached our potential as human beings. We take shortcuts and as a result we’re all losers. As a result Edge is a loser and he is the champion because he’s an honest man who always says and does what he’s going to do. That’s why he’s still champion. Jericho says it is so.
Edge’s music hits and he makes his way to the ring looking none too happy. Edge says Jericho makes a valid point. Edge and the people do have a lot in common. By the sounds of it we all love watching him get speared. Edge says we’d love to watch him spear Jericho tonight. Edge wants his rematch right now! Jericho smiles and says he doesn’t care what he wants. Edge doesn’t hold the cards. He had his chance at WrestleMania and he lost. The way he sees it that puts him in the back of the line because he’s a loser. Nothing Edge says or does will change that. Jericho tells him to get out of his ring.
Edge lays Jericho out with punches. Edge focuses on the ribs and rips his shirt off to reveal his taped up ribs. Edge hits the Edgecution and sets up for his finish. Jericho slowly gets up and gets speared! Edge raises his arms in the air and soaks in the applause.
All of a sudden Jack Swagger runs down and lays Edge out with the Money in the Bank briefcase! Swagger grabs the microphone and says to get a referee out here because he’s cashing in! Mike Chioda runs down and it’s on!
WWE World Heavyweight Championship Match
Chris Jericho (c) vs. Jack Swagger
Mike Chioda clears the ring of all the microphones and checks on Jericho. Jericho gets up and the bell rings. Swagger hits the Gutwrench Powerbomb and pins Jericho to become the NEW World Heavyweight Champion!!
Winner & NEW World Heavyweight Champion: Jack Swagger
Match Rating: N/A
Jack Swagger stands over Jericho with his World Heavyweight Championship. The crowd and I are in total shock. This guy was losing on Superstars two weeks ago and now he’s the World Heavyweight Champion. Whoa!
We come back from the break and see the replays of what just happened. Absolutely shocking! Jack Swagger is the new World Heavyweight Champion!
R-Truth & John Morrison vs. Cryme Tyme
R-Truth and Shad will start out. They lock up and R-Truth gets a side headlock. Shad whips him off and hits a shoulder block. Shad gorilla presses him but R-Truth slides off and hits the Scissors Kick. Morrison is tagged in and he hits Starship Pain for the win.
Winners by Pinfall: R-Truth & John Morrison
Match Rating: N/A
JTG is standing on the apron and he can’t believe it. Morrison and R-Truth leave as JTG helps Shad up. They talk in the ring and things go south. Shad grabs his face and JTG pushes his hand off. Shad then hits a big boot! Shad knees JTG a bunch of times before knocking him out with a straight right hand. Shad picks him up and hits Thugnificent. Cryme Tyme is officially over.
World Heavyweight Champion Jack Swagger is walking backstage. Swagger walks by Tony Atlas, Mickie James, and Slam Master J. Tony Atlas congratulates him on becoming champion. Swagger then walks by Shelton Benjamin and says maybe they should call him the gold standard now. Swagger then walks off.
We see replays of Shad’s beat down on JTG. Cryme Tyme has broken up, one of the few real tag teams in WWE.
Josh Mathews interviews Shad. Shad cuts him off and says no more Cryme Tyme. This is his time. Mathews cowardly walks away.
Intercontinental Champion Drew McIntyre makes his way to the ring. Matt Hardy will be his opponent. As Hardy goes through the ropes McIntyre kicks him in the face. McIntyre sends him shoulder first into the ring post and brings him into the ring. McIntyre then hits the Future Shock DDT and this match never even started. McIntyre stands over Hardy with the Intercontinental Championship.
A video hyping John Cena’s appearance on True Jackson from Nickelodeon airs. This show looks like garbage. I miss the days of All That and Legends of the Hidden Temple. Those were real shows.
We’ll look at the Shawn Michaels Farewell next.
Once again we see a replay of Jack Swagger becoming the World Heavyweight Champion after cashing in Money in the Bank.
The unbelievable Shawn Michaels video plays. I’ll miss that guy. One of the all time best ever: period.
We go from that to Michelle McCool, Layla, and Vickie Guerrero chatting backstage. Vickie says she’s mad that everyone is calling the Frog Splash the Hog Splash. Jack Swagger walks in and is looking for Teddy Long. She says she’s the official consultant for Smackdown and is better. Swagger says he wants to make an official State of the Championship address tonight. Vickie congratulates him and says to take all the time he wants. Swagger gives her a kiss on the cheek.
The Great Khali is coming out to the ring. He’ll face Dolph Ziggler next.
The Great Khali vs. Dolph Ziggler
Ziggler quickly gets out of the ring as soon as the bell rings. Ziggler then enters, ducks a clothesline, and takes a clothesline. Khali chops his chest in the corner before sending him into the ropes for a big boot. Ziggler leaves the ring so Khali pulls him up by the hair. Ziggler stuns him on the top rope and jumps on the back for a sleeper hold. Khali pulls him off but can’t gain his bearings. Ziggler jumps on his back and locks the sleeper hold in again. Ziggler holds it in forever until the referee stops the match.
Winner by Referee Stoppage: Dolph Ziggler
Match Rating: *
Dolph Ziggler goes up the ramp and Khali asks for a microphone. Khali speaks in his native tongue and Ranjin Singh translates for him. Khali said he’s been doing a lot of soul searching and it’s time for him to go back home to India to spend time with his family. Khali will regroup and when he returns he’ll become World Champion.
CM Punk and the S.E.S. are coming to the ring next.
The Smack of the Night is still photos of Rey Mysterio defeating CM Punk at WrestleMania.
CM Punk and the Straight Edge Society come to the ring. Luke Gallows says the people need to open their ears and listen. Punk saved him and he can save us all. Gallows says to look at the transformation he made. All of his impurities have been washed away. The time is now. It’s time to make a change for the better right here and now.
Punk takes the mic and can’t talk because of the booing. Serena takes the microphone and says to show some respect. She says that Punk is perfect in every way. He’s selfless and remarkable. He’s a healer. If we would take a moment and look into his eyes we would see that he is not blinded by a world of sin and addiction like we are. CM Punk can save us like he did for her and Luke Gallows. If it wasn’t for him they would be like us. When she looks around the crowd she sees a sea of demons and when she looks at Punk she sees an angel.
Punk takes the microphone and says if there ever was a city in the WWE Universe that needed to be saved they’re in it: Las Vegas. For those of us sitting at home, he envies us simply because we’re not there. Punk says that in Las Vegas you can get an alcoholic beverage any time of the day. The crowd cheers wildly. That’s hilarious. Punk calls the crowd sheep following the herd. Punk says the line “What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.” Punk says that’s a lie and they’re all lying to themselves, just like Rey Mysterio. Punk said he was supposed to save Mysterio on the grandest stage of them all. Instead he’s still out there lying to himself. Whether Mysterio wants it or not, he needs straightedge. He needs CM Punk. Mysterio will be his crown jewel to prove to everyone that they need straightedge.
Punk asks for a rematch. Punk says he knows his knee jerk reaction but he’ll sacrifice something important. It’s something free of foreign chemicals and something that represents his internal purity. It represents his position as the leader of the Straight Edge Society. CM Punk will put his hair on the line in this match! That’s how much he cares about Mysterio. He’ll sacrifice a piece of himself just to save him.
Jack Swagger’s State of the Championship address will happen tonight.
Michelle McCool & Layla vs. Tiffany & Beth Phoenix
The Goose will officiate this one. McCool and Tiffany start out and they lock up. McCool powers her to the corner and pushes her. McCool downs some taunts and runs into a drop toe hold. Tiffany hits an inverted atomic drop and a monkey flip. Tiffany goes for the ten punches but McCool pushes her off and gets a near fall. McCool chokes her on the ropes before slamming her down.
Layla is tagged in and they hit a double face buster. Layla hits a kind of leg drop for a one count. Layla applies a chin lock and is looking for a submission. Tiffany eventually gets out and tags in Beth Phoenix. Beth runs in and takes Layla out with an airplane spin and a clothesline. Beth knocks McCool off the apron and hits the Glam Slam on Layla for the win.
Winners by Pinfall: Tiffany & Beth Phoenix
Match Rating: *
That was officially the longest match of the night so far. That was a solid minute and forty-five seconds of wrestling. What is going on tonight?
Teddy Long is watching on TV when Chris Jericho walks in. Jericho says he’ll say this one time only. Jericho wants him to reverse the decision and give him back his championship. Long says he won’t reverse the decision and asks if he wants his rematch tonight. Jericho says he can’t because he’s hurt. Long says if he doesn’t want the rematch tonight then they have nothing to talk about. Jericho warns him that Swagger won’t get away with this. Jericho says he’s the champion and leaves.
Photos are shown of the Hart Dynasty giving Mr. McMahon the Hart Attack at WrestleMania.
Natalya says they’re excited about this opportunity and the best part is they won’t let anyone down. David Hart Smith says it was an honor to watch Stu Hart get inducted into the Hall of Fame. Smith says it was a privilege to be involved in Bret Hart’s match against Mr. McMahon. Tyson Kidd says it’s their time to carry on the Hart Family tradition. Jack Swagger then walks into the shot and holds the title up.
Kane makes his way to the ring and grabs a microphone. Kane says he’s getting a little bored and when he gets bored he gets frustrated. A frustrated monster is not healthy for anyone. He needs someone to take the frustration out on and the more the merrier. Tonight he’ll take on the entire NXT roster.
Elimination Handicap Tag Match
Kane vs. NXT Rookies
Daniel Bryan starts out against Kane. Bryan kicks at Kane until being pushed away. Bryan avoids some strikes and hits some more kicks. Bryan runs into a body slam and a low dropkick to the face. Darren Young is tagged in. He takes an uppercut and goes into the ropes but holds on. Young gives him a back elbow but that just angers Kane more. Young goes for an axe handle but Kane punches him. Kane hits a hip toss and Justin Gabriel is tagged in. Wade Barrett then blind tags in. Kane punches him and puts him in the corner. Barrett fights back and punches Kane in the corner. Barrett then takes an uppercut. Barrett goes into the ropes and takes a big boot. Kane pins and eliminates him.
We come back from the break to see Skip Sheffield dropped by an uppercut. Kane sends him to the corner and clotheslines him. Kane goes for a powerslam and Heath Slater tags in. Slater knees Kane and kicks him. Slater jumps right into a Chokeslam and just like that he’s gone. Michael Tarver is next and he gets thrown over the top rope by the throat. David Otunga, Raw’s guest host, talks with the NXT rookies and they gather at ringside.
The remaining rookies surround the ring and they all attack Kane. It’s a DQ I guess? This is trash.
Winner by Disqualification: Kane
Match Rating: *
Kane comes back but gets dropped by a Daniel Bryan missile dropkick. They all hit their big moves, including Justin Gabriel’s amazing 450 Splash! They celebrate until Kane gets up. They then run away like the next breakout stars would do. Yikes!
The replay of Jack Swagger winning the title plays again. He’ll do a State of the Championship address next.
World Heavyweight Champion Jack Swagger makes his way to the ring. Swagger walks to the ring calmly with a straight face. There’s no more of that lame smiling and jumping around. He actually looks like a champion. This is his moment now.
Swagger is in the ring holding a portfolio. Swagger says this is the first of many addresses he’ll be giving. He’s prepared a few statements. Swagger congratulates the crowd on being a part of history. This night will be the apex of their lives as they witnessed him becoming champion. Swagger says he’ll be champion for an extremely long time. Swagger wants absolute silence until the speech is over. If he wants silence just bring Drew McIntyre to the ring with you.
Swagger goes over his accomplishments as an amateur wrestler. Swagger mentions that four months after debuting he became ECW Champion. Then he beat nine other guys and is the World Champion. Swagger says we’ve got our replacement for Shawn Michaels as the greatest living wrestler on the planet.
Chris Jericho’s music hits and he makes his way to the ring with his ribs all taped up. Jericho looks like he’s going to cry as he tells Swagger to give the title back to him. Swagger says it’s his and there’s nothing he can do about it. Jericho says he’s the champion and not Swagger. Swagger committed the biggest crime in WWE history. He robbed Jericho and he wants it back. Jericho says he’s lucky he’s injured. Jericho says he heals quickly and he’ll take it back. Jericho wants the travesty righted right now.
Edge’s music hits and he comes to the ring now. Edge says if we want to see what kind of champion Swagger is then they should face. Edge says he wouldn’t be champion if it wasn’t for him. Edge tells him to face someone who’s not injured or afraid to face him. Jericho says he has no right to request that match. Edge says he hit him with the two spears that caused him to be an ex-champion. Edge tells Jericho to shut his mouth.
Teddy Long’s music hits and the Smackdown General Manager comes to the stage. Long says Jericho has a rematch but he doesn’t want to take it. Edge can take it but he doesn’t have a rematch. Long’s solution is that next week Chris Jericho will go one on one with Edge. The winner of the match will face Jack Swagger for the championship. The WrestleMania XXVI rematch happens next week.
All of a sudden Chris Jericho takes Edge out with the Codebreaker. The impact hurts Jericho’s ribs and Jack Swagger takes advantage with a Gutwrench Powerbomb. Swagger then hits Edge with the powerbomb and stands over them with the championship.
Quick Match Results
Jack Swagger def. Chris Jericho to WIN the World Title
R-Truth & John Morrison def. Cryme Tyme
Dolph Ziggler def. The Great Khali via ref stoppage
Tiffany & Beth Phoenix* def. Michelle McCool & Layla*
Kane def. NXT Rookies via DQ
Bump of the Night: Shad’s beat down of JTG
Match of the Night: The Diva match *
Smackdown started off hot with Jack Swagger cashing in his Money in the Bank contract to win the World Heavyweight Championship. That was a tremendous surprise and it was cool that it happened on Smackdown. Unfortunately the rest of the show was pure garbage. There were very few saving graces from there.
The obvious focus of the show was the title change. Jack Swagger was tremendous in his role. He’s gone away from that goofy jumping and smiling. Instead he’s replaced it with a cool, stern look that makes him look like a total champion. I can’t believe that this guy was losing on Superstars just a few weeks ago and now he’s champion.. and he looks like a champion! His State of the Championship address was humorous even though it was really short. Swagger looks like he’s got a good first feud coming up. He’ll probably take on Jericho and Edge in a triple threat at Extreme Rules. That’ll be a good rub for him.
I’m also happy to see the CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio feud will continue. I think we all were expecting Punk’s hair to go up at some point. I figured it would also involve Rey’s mask but I’m glad it didn’t. That way the outcome isn’t so blatant. I could see Punk losing his hair but I could also see Mysterio being trapped in the S.E.S. in a JBL/HBK type fashion. I loved their match at WrestleMania, even though they got screwed with time. They should have been given more than seven minutes. Hopefully they can go for a while at Extreme Rules.
The rest of the show was horrible. Cryme Tyme broke up and maybe three people in the crowd cared. I think one or both of them are going to go the way of the Dodo. The one saving grace is that Khali is going away for a while. That was a nice early Easter gift. I’m not sure what the point of the Kane vs. NXT match was other than to make them look really weak. That was so bad. Other than the title switch it seemed like no thought was put into this show. It just felt thrown together. Hopefully Smackdown will rebound next week and give us the show that we’ve come to expect on Friday nights.
Final Rating: **
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