The Smackdown video plays, and we’re brought into the show with a big fireworks display. Josh Mathews and Michael Cole welcome us to the show. Tonight’s main event will see Sheamus and Randy Orton take on Alberto Del Rio and Dolph Ziggler.
Lilian Garcia asks the crowd to welcome to the ring WWE Hall of Famer, Edge! Edge comes out to a great reception with his new haircut. Edge takes some time before saying the reaction from the crowd never gets old. There is a few reasons why he’s here. One reason is that Philly is the home of the broad street bullies. Secondly, eighteen months ago he announced his retirement. He wondered what he was going to do because this is all he wanted to do. However (cheap plug time), he got into a show called “Haven” that will air right after Smackdown. Edge says he’s been able to start watching WWE as a fan again. He’s seen a lot of crazy things in his career and as a fan, but he’s never quite seen anything like this. They then roll footage of Kane and Daniel Bryan arguing over who the Tag Team Champion is from Raw. They then hugged it out. The crowd starts chanting, “Yes!” Edge says he’s been away for a little while, but can someone explain how the Devil’s Favorite Demon and Goat Boy become BFFs? And how did they become the Tag Team Champions?
Daniel Bryan’s music hits, and he makes his way out to the ring. Bryan wants to correct Edge on his use of pronouns. “They” didn’t become the Tag Team Champions. HE is the Tag Team Champions! Bryan gets in Edge’s face and screams it over and over again. Edge tells him to calm down. The entire arena is trying to get a rise out of him, and he’s oblivious to it. Edge asks how he did it. Bryan says he is in control of himself. He is an anchor. He is a rock. He is one with his emotions. Edge asks if he’s kidding, and Bryan says, “No.” Bryan can see why someone like Edge would be suspicious. Edge says, “Excuse me?” Bryan says that’s interesting since subconscious thoughts come to the front of your mind, as Dr. Shelby has taught him. Bryan asks Edge if he often thinks of his ex-wife. Bryan has a theory: Edge’s theme music explains it all. “You think you know me,” but does anyone really know Edge? Bryan tells Edge to go back to acting and retirement. There is nothing Edge or anyone can do to make him snap. Edge’s intention wasn’t to make him snap, but it does kind of sound like a challenge. Bryan says, “No, it doesn’t.” Edge says, “Yes, it does.” They then get into a “Yes” and “No” screaming match.
Kane’s pyro hits, and he comes out to the ring. Kane says they’re both wrong because he is the Tag Team Champions. Bryan and Kane go back and forth with that before Edge screams for them to stop. Kane says that Edge seems angry. Bryan tells him to take it easy. Kane says Dr. Shelby has some great relaxation exercises. Edge can’t believe what he’s hearing. They’ve tortured each other for weeks, but he gets Bryan being one with himself. However, Kane is not Barney the big red dinosaur. He’s the Big Red Machine. Edge stole Kane’s wife, and then Kane broke up the wedding by giving a priest a Tombstone. He threw pizza in his father’s face. Edge wonders if Kane remembers that. Kane remembers it all, and he thinks that he needs to rectify that situation right now. Edge takes off his jacket, and Kane extends his arms for a hug. The crowd cheers it on, and Edge eventually relents. They hug it out.
Bryan starts saying, “No!” Edge stops him, and he extends his arms for a group hug, but Damien Sandow’s music hits instead. Sandow wants to beg the crowd’s indulgence because he’s here to help. For the past fortnight, this very serial has been plagued by the sophomoric antics of these miscreants. Their attempts to “hug it out” are an abomination, and the half-wits lap it up like a canine laps up a feces ridden puddle. Edge tells him to shut up. He can watch Kane and Bryan “hug it out” for the whole show, but thirty seconds of Sandow makes him want to puke. Edge tells him to come down and fight, but he doesn’t want to. Edge asks the crowd whom Sandow should face, and Sandow says their opinions don’t count. Sandow goes nuts as they go to commercial.
Kane vs. Damien Sandow
They lock up, but Kane whips him off and shoulder blocks him down. Sandow gets out of the ring, and Kane chases. Kane avoids an elbow drop and goes to work on Sandow. Sandow comes back with a kick to the face, but Kane stands straight up. Sandow gets out of the ring and sees Daniel Bryan, who says, “I’m the Tag Team Champions.” Kane grabs him and throws him back in the ring, but Sandow manages to snap his arm off the top rope. Sandow stomps away at Kane, but he quickly comes back with a back suplex. Kane clotheslines him in the corner and hits a sidewalk slam for a two count. Kane hits his flying lariat and goes for a Chokeslam, but Bryan gets on the apron. They go back and forth over whom the Tag Team Champion is, and Sandow hits his double arm neckbreaker for the win.
Winner by Pinfall: Damien Sandow
Match Rating: 1/2 *
Later tonight, we’ll see Sheamus and Randy Orton take on Alberto Del Rio and Dolph Ziggler.
Michael Cole and Josh Mathews talk about WWE’s partnership with Susan G. Komen For The Cure.
Kane is tearing up backstage looking for Daniel Bryan. Kane bumps into Dr. Shelby, and he tells him to calm down. Bryan cost him his match and took the belts. If he doesn’t give it back, he’ll tear that beard off his goat face. Bryan pops out of a crate and says he doesn’t have a goat face. Kane says, “Do too!” and they go back and forth with that. Dr. Shelby goes nuts, and they go back to normal. Bryan winds up giving him his belt. Kane says there is still the issue of Bryan purposely making him lose. Dr. Shelby says if it would be ok if he talks to Booker T and has Bryan wrestle. Kane says it just might be ok. Kane says he is the Tag Team Champions, and he leaves.
Elsewhere backstage, Alberto Del Rio is looking at Booker T’s book. Del Rio calls Booker T a coward over what happened on Sunday when he reinstated the Brogue Kick. Booker T says his investigation was completed. The Brogue Kick is dangerous, but legal. Del Rio says he did it right before the match, and Booker T says it may not have been fair. Del Rio asks if that means he’ll give him another title opportunity. Booker T says, “Hell no!” Del Rio has to earn it, and he’ll have his chance when he takes on Sheamus and Randy Orton with Dolph Ziggler. Del Rio throws Booker T’s book before leaving.
Eve Torres makes her way to the ring. She’ll commentate on the next match.
Layla vs. Natalya
Charles Robinson, my favorite referee, is the official of this match. Layla kicks her and hits a face-buster. Layla looks at Eve, and Natalya takes her down. Natalya goes to work and applies an abdominal stretch. Layla tries to get out, and she rolls up Natalya for a two count. Natalya goes for a Sharpshooter, but Layla kicks her off. Layla hits the Lay-Out out of nowhere for the win.
Winner by Pinfall: Layla
Match Rating: 1/4 *
Sheamus and Randy Orton will take on Alberto Del Rio and Dolph Ziggler, next.
The participants of the tag team match make their way to the ring. The match will begin after the break.
Alberto Del Rio and Dolph Ziggler vs. Randy Orton and Sheamus
Del Rio and Sheamus are locked up, but Sheamus comes back with a neckbreaker. Orton is tagged in, and he dropkicks Del Rio down for a one count. Orton stomps away at him before tagging Sheamus back in. Sheamus misses a shoulder block in the corner, and Del Rio catches him with a step-up kick to the shoulder. Del Rio kicks at him, but Sheamus soon catches him with a fireman’s carry senton, but Vickie Guerrero gets on the apron before he can execute a pin. Ziggler attacks him from behind as the referee is distracted. Del Rio dropkicks him for a two count. Ziggler is tagged in, and he drops an elbow for a two count. Ziggler applies a sleeper hold, and Del Rio tags in. Del Rio kicks him in the ribs and applies a chin lock. Sheamus fights up and sends him to the ropes, but Del Rio kicks him in the face. Sheamus quickly comes back with a powerslam.
Orton is tagged in, and he goes to work on Del Rio with some clotheslines and a powerslam. Orton hits a hanging DDT and sets up for an RKO, but all of a sudden he pops up and catches Ziggler with a powerslam. Orton goes for a hanging DDT on Ziggler, but Del Rio sweeps the legs. Del Rio catches him with the backstabber for a near fall. Ziggler is tagged in, and he chokes Orton on the ropes. Orton shoves him to the corner, but Ziggler comes back with a running elbow to the throat for a two count. Ziggler applies a side headlock, but Orton takes him out with a back suplex. Orton tries to tag Sheamus, but Ziggler tags Del Rio in, and he cuts Orton off. Del Rio kicks him in the ribs, goes to the second rope, and gets dropkicked off by Orton.
Sheamus and Ziggler are tagged in, and he takes him out with some Irish hammers. Ziggler avoids a running knee lift and applies a sleeper hold. Sheamus rips him off, but Ziggler quickly avoids the Brogue Kick. Ziggler kicks him in the knee, Sheamus counters the leg drop bulldog, and he catches him with the Irish Curse Backbreaker. Del Rio breaks up the pin and goes for the Cross Arm Breaker, but Sheamus pushes him into an RKO! Sheamus then catches Ziggler with the Brogue Kick for the win!
Winners by Pinfall: Randy Orton and Sheamus
Match Rating: * 3/4
Daniel Bryan will take on Cody Rhodes as per Dr. Shelby’s suggestion, next.
Daniel Bryan vs. Cody Rhodes
Bryan kicks away at him, but Rhodes comes back with a flapjack into the ropes. Rhodes kicks away at him for a no count. Rhodes hits a front suplex, but Bryan soon comes back with a flying elbow. Bryan catches him with a dropkick in the corner and goes for the No! Lock, but Kane’s pyro hits. Kane makes the ring posts explode, and Rhodes catches him with the Cross Rhodes for the win.
Winner by Pinfall: Cody Rhodes
Match Rating: 1/2 *
Kane laughs at Daniel Bryan’s misfortunes from the stage.
We’ll take a look at what happened on Raw this past Monday, next.
Daniel Bryan is looking for Kane backstage. Bryan yells at him for distracting him at the most important part of the match. Kane says it was payback. Bryan says Kane is just jealous that he’s the better singles competitor. Kane couldn’t wrestle out of an arena basement. Kane says Bryan belongs in a petting zoo with his goat face. They go back and forth until they see Damien Sandow and Cody Rhodes looking at them. Rhodes says they’re a joke, and Sandow says it looks like this experiment is coming to a combustible end. Kane and Bryan challenge them to a match tonight, and they walk away. Bryan says they’re afraid of him, but Kane thinks they’re afraid of him. They go back and forth, again.
They show the Raw Rebound with the controversial ending.
Brodus Clay makes his way to the ring. He’ll be in action, next.
Brodus Clay vs. Heath Slater
Slater dances and pushes him, but Brodus slams him down. Brodus eventually hits a T-Bone Suplex and sets up for his finish, but Drew McIntyre and Jinder Mahal attack him from behind! They hit a double suplex before McIntyre hits the Future Shock DDT. Mahal applies the Camel Clutch, and all three men stand united in the ring.
Winner by Disqualification: Brodus Clay
Match Rating: N/A
Jerry “The King” Lawler will be interviewed on Raw next Monday.
Santino Marella vs. Antonio Cesaro w/ Aksana
Cesaro kicks him and takes him down with a European uppercut. Cesaro hits a gutwrench suplex, but Santino soon comes back with a flurry of offense, finishing off with a hip toss and a falling head-butt. The Cobra comes out, but Aksana gets on the apron, causing the Cobra to become distracted. Cesaro knees him, rips the Cobra off, and hits a big uppercut. Aksana hurt her knee during the exchange, and the referee had his attention on her as he went for the pin. Cesaro yells at her, and Santino rolls him up for the win.
Winner by Pinfall: Santino Marella
Match Rating: 1/4 *
Cesaro grabs a microphone, and he says he’s thinking of something in five different languages for Aksana. He proceeds to break up with her in five different languages. Aksana calls after him, but he storms off.
All the tag teams in the division surround the ring. There are three teams.
Damien Sandow and Cody Rhodes vs. Daniel Bryan and Kane
Kane starts the match against Rhodes. Kane punches at him, but Rhodes soon ducks a clothesline and tags in Sandow. Kane bring him in the hard way before giving some knees in the corner. Kane takes him down for a one count. Kane hits a snapmare and a low dropkick to the face before Bryan tags himself him. They argue, but Bryan catches Rhodes, who was tagged in, with a drop-toe-hold. Bryan kicks away at him and hits a dropkick for a two count. Bryan goes to tag Kane in, but he instead says, “No.” Rhodes pushes him into Kane, hits the Disaster Kick, and picks up a near fall. Kane rolls out of the ring, and Sandow throws him into the barricade.
Sandow is tagged in, and he punches away at Bryan. Rhodes is tagged back in, and he elbows Bryan in the face. They both wind up hitting the ropes and hitting dual cross-body blocks. Kane and Sandow are tagged in, and he punches away at Sandow. Kane knocks Rhodes off the apron, and he catches Sandow with a DDT. Kane goes for a Chokeslam, but Sandow elbows out. Sandow hits the ropes, and he runs into a Chokeslam. Rhodes then hits Kane with a steel chair.
Winners by Disqualification: Daniel Bryan and Kane
Match Rating: 3/4 *
Bryan blocks Rhodes from hitting Kane with a chair. He goes to hit Rhodes with it, but he instead gives it to Kane. Kane hits him in the gut with the chair and cracks him out of the ring. They stand over Sandow, and they’re both smiling. They go back and forth with the chair shots, and the crowd loves it. Kane then grabs the Uso brothers, and Bryan takes them out with the chair. Kane attacks the rest of the division, and they all get chair shots. They absolutely destroy the tag team division. Kane then picks up a belt, gives it to Bryan, and they raise them up over their heads. This is a breakthrough for them according to Michael Cole.
Quick Match Results
Damien Sandow def. Kane
Layla def. Natalya
Randy Orton and Sheamus def. Alberto Del Rio and Dolph Ziggler
Cody Rhodes def. Daniel Bryan
Brodus Clay def. Heath Slater via DQ
Santino Marella def. Antonio Cesaro (non-title)
Daniel Bryan and Kane def. Damien Sandow and Cody Rhodes via DQ (non-title)
Bump of the Night: Kane and Bryan taking out the tag division with chairs
Match of the Night: Orton and Sheamus vs. Del Rio and Ziggler * 3/4
The show kicked off nicely with an appearance by Edge, the Hall of Famer who called Smackdown home for a bunch of years. Sure, he was only there to shamelessly shill his TV show that was airing right after Smackdown, but he had a lot of fun with his appearance. Daniel Bryan quickly joined Edge, and they had a lot of fun going back and forth. Them going back and forth with the “Yes” and “No” thing was pretty funny. Then Kane joined them, and then things picked up some more. Edge reminding him of their history and then Kane getting him to “hug it out” was hilarious. It may have been a little long (it seemed like the crowd wasn’t completely into it in the beginning), but I enjoyed it. Damien Sandow then came out to set up what would be the theme of the rest of the show.
Damien Sandow took on Kane in a quick match where they just fumbled through things, and then Daniel Bryan cost him the match. This led to a hilarious segment backstage between the two of them and Dr. Shelby. Bryan and Kane were acting like two little brothers going back with lame insults. I particularly loved when Kane was looking for him in the first segment, calling Bryan a goat face to Dr. Shelby, and Bryan was hiding in a trunk. He pops out and goes, “I’m not a goat face!” Absolutely hilarious! Seriously, Daniel Bryan hiding in a crate backstage! This show was just centered around these two from beginning to end. Bryan was up next to have a match with Cody Rhodes, and Kane cost him that match as well. They had another funny segment that ended with them challenging Sandow and Rhodes to a match in the main event. That too was an ok match. Nothing great. Randomly it was made a lumberjack match, but I guess it made sense for what they wanted to do – destroy three of the four (or so) tag teams to show dominance. The skits were entertaining. I wouldn’t have made them the main event, but whatever. The show was pointless in terms of build for anything, but it was entertaining.
I’m not sure where they’re going with Sheamus and Alberto Del Rio. I wouldn’t want to see them fight again, but for some reason I feel like they’re heading in that direction for Hell in a Cell. Del Rio has been in contention since May. I think enough is enough with it. They got the most they could out of the program. They should quit while they’re ahead. I do like Randy Orton hanging in a feud with Dolph Ziggler. That can only be good for Ziggler.
The rest of the show was just filler. The diva’s storyline… ugh. Need I say more? Brodus Clay being attacked by the trio of Slater, Mahal, and McIntyre? Mahal’s involvement immediately ruins that for me. Antonio Cesaro breaking up with Aksana? That could actually be good for him. Now if he could move on from having matches with Santino, that would be great!
Final Rating: **
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