This is going to be a long one. Make sure you packed a brown bag lunch.
First off, I enjoy a good April Fools’ Joke. I always do jokes with many a student back in the day. My personal favorites were giving students detention slips just so they can show their parents how “bad” they were (don’t worry, I wrote April Fools’ on the last line of the detention slip). However, let’s get one thing perfectly clear.
There will be NO April Fools’ Jokes in my column. Students, you have my word. Heck, some people near Pittsburgh think I tell them a joke when I tell them I moonlight as a professional wrestling columnist. Well for those people…THE JOKE IS ON YOU!!!!
Now that we got that perfectly clear, let us go back to class. Oh wait! I have an introduction. Cue it!
Introduction (From: Rocky Dominguez)
Ladies and Gentlemen he humbled the one pounder now let him humble your wrestling mind the man, the myth the wrestling master, Anthony J. Valvo!
Yes Students! Mr. V accepted the challenge of eating a one pound burger at Cheeburger Cheeburger (that is actually the name of the restaurant) in front of family and friends in Monaca, PA. I took the advice from my friend (eat with a knife and fork) and I was able to chow down on the tastiest well-done burger in America!
To find the location nearest you, here is the website: http://cheeburger.com.
If there is one nearby, don’t fear the challenge. If I could do it, anyone can. Plus, they have a Wall of Fame which shows the people who down this massive feast. I was proud to embrace the massive plush cheeseburger and autographed it personally.
Oh yeah, and there was a ton of wrestling to go over. Keep in mind that I decided to temporarily close the book on commentary report card grades. The reason is simple. I don’t have room.* I would like to add it, but in all honesty with this being my Post-WrestleMania column I tend to get long. So there is my reason.
*-you want to know why I put the asterisk on here, huh? Well, with this new web design (which I totally dig by the way) I noticed that there are a lot of question marks. As a teacher, I do enjoy asking questions, but don’t think that I am asking a question each time you see it. I just wanted to address that. But Kudos to Tom Van Stone. I know he told me that he was working real hard on this design and I for one enjoy the overall layout. On a side note, glad that Mr. Van Stone is a fellow Knight. TVS knows what I am talking about.
Well, as you know I am WrestleView’s Resident Teacher, and you are my loyal students. I tend to give you the good and the bad of professional wrestling. I issue out the Gold Stars and the Detentions. I also give out the Dunce Cap of Doom to whomever I please. Don’t worry, it won’t be a wrestler this time around. So have a seat, listen to your favorite classical music and grab a cup of coffee. I will get you started.
Ah, reminds one of ice cream, huh?
Enough of the intro! School is in Session!
Quote of the Week
I was going to make this a Classroom down the road, but I will mention it here this week. It comes from WrestleView’s own Jose Marrero (who was our first ever guest on The Teacher’s Lounge on the WVIP Network). He said this in regards to some, but not all, of the fans that attend wrestling shows:
“It’s ok to shower” ? Jose Marrero
I could not agree more Jose! One pays good money and one must pray for a good seat not just for good action, but pray that you don’t sit next to some fat guy that will recap that show with no pants on in a basement (See a WM Review from a guy that Dave Stephens sent me, it is a classic reason why some should just not be allowed to post on the Internet). If you still don’t know what I am talking about, check out my Facebook Page.
On a serious note, I want to thank Jose Marrero once again for being a terrific guest for Dave and I’s first ever show. The invitation is always open, my friend.
Ok, I am done. I don’t want this to be a funny column all the time. Let’s get down to business.
1) Something to keep your thoughts and prayers on.
The next time I type a column for my WrestleView Students, it will be past the first year anniversary of one of the most tragic things to have happened in the city of Pittsburgh. On April 4, 2010 The Pittsburgh Police Department lost three tremendous officers. I still keep their families in my thoughts and prayers and ask for my students to wish them all well still. Coming from someone whose brother patrols Pittsburgh, I think they are the finest group of individuals in our area and deserve our respect. For that I will copy what I wrote back on From the Desk of Mr. V #9:
Before I begin my latest edition of my column, I know my loyal students won’t mind me expressing my thoughts and prayers to a few families first. On Saturday April 4, 2009, two Pittsburgh Police officers were killed in the line of duty and one police officer, who was off-duty, was also killed by the same individual. I was a bit concerned over this because I do have a family member who is a police officer in Pittsburgh, my brother. I offered my condolences over the phone with him to the families of the fallen, and he appreciated them. So to all my students, if you want to show support for the Pittsburgh Police Department, you can e-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org and I promise to share them with my brother. I am very thankful that my brother was unharmed and very thankful that the residents of Stanton Heights were unharmed as well. These three officers paid the ultimate sacrifice to keep all residents safe in the city of Pittsburgh, and I offer my thanks and support to all officers in the area. So please, keep the families of Officer Eric Kelly, Officer Paul Sciullo, and Officer Stephen Mayhle in your thoughts and prayers today. Trust me; every bit of moral support is grateful for Pittsburgh’s Finest. My thanks in advance to those people who will e-mail their condolences.
You three will never be forgotten from this teacher.
If you see an officer nearby, thank them for doing their best in the line of duty. They don’t get paid as much as your favorite athlete or public figure, but they sure as hell do a lot more for your area.
2) WrestleMania ? The REAL men that made the grade.
Well, I was one that hosted a WrestleMania feast in my residence. The card had ten matches (even though there were nine announced at the time my column was published). I will try to keep this short and then go to my detentions and such. As you know in my last columns, I did a pre-grade. I watched it once and gave it my first grade of the PPV. Then I watched it again to do a double take just in case there was something I missed out on while turning towards the food my wife provided for us (she is still the best). So, let’s get it started.
POTENTIAL GRADES WERE FROM LAST WEEK’S COLUMN (Mr. V #61)
Match #1 ? John Morrison and R-Truth vs. The Big Show and The Miz.
Potential Grade: C (but leaned toward a C+).
Actual Grade: C-
Second Take Grade: C
This match took 3:24 to complete. It was won when The Big Show tagged in and knocked out John Morrison while he attempted to do the Flying Chuck on The Miz. ShoMiz are STILL your Unified Tag Team Champions.
My thoughts were that the match obviously went too quickly. It had some good tag team wrestling to start, but then it seemed a bit rushed.
If anyone came out a winner here, it would be The Big Show. Show was very effective with his brief offensive moves. He used his basic tactics and then laid a HUGE punch on Morrison to help ShoMiz retain the titles.
There were a lot of losers in this one. The Miz, though also the United States Champion, looked very weak and was dependent on his tag team partner. Miz was booked poorly here since he really took bumps and did not generate offense. Also, remember when I thought John Morrison was going to be a huge main event star? Well, I guess I was wrong there. Morrison, who has a DVD out you know, was strong when he had to. However, he was the one that took the job here? Morrison is not being used correctly at this time and it is tough to watch. For someone with great promise in Morrison, one would think that he would amount to something special on WrestleMania, right?
Tag Team Wrestling in the WWE may be gone as we know it. Both teams were pretty rushed and though the storyline was strong with battles won back and forth, the closure was disappointing. There is no direction in the tag team division. Cryme Tyme is on the outs, Legacy is gone, and the Hart Dynasty is evolving to something special. Also, there are some decent teams in FCW that have some promise. However, with the lack of tag team wresting in the WWE it is pretty difficult to see where the future lies for some teams and those titles.
Match #2 ? Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase Jr. vs. Cody Rhodes.
Potential Grade: C+
Actual Grade: C
Second Take Grade: B-
The match took 9:01 to complete. It ended when Randy Orton punted Cody Rhodes in the skull and moments later defeated DiBiase, Jr. with an RKO.
My thoughts were pretty simple. The teacher beat the students. Orton was the star in this match. Orton’s offense was superb and was clearly a step ahead of the two men he attempted to mentor.
The real winner here was Randy Orton. Sure, he had a bad showing at WrestleMania 25, but was it entirely his fault? In my opinion, it was not. On Sunday, this was the best I seen of Orton since Bragging Rights. Orton sold offense well here, and was able to dish out an absurd amount of pain. His gimmick is that of a face loner now, and honestly I think it could work out for Orton. Let him be that “Stone Cole” role and see how that plays out.
Though some may disagree, but I thought Cody Rhodes was real sloppy. He really looked bad at times and appeared to be nervous, which is understandable since he is still one of the youngest men on the WWE roster. His timing was occasionally poor and he did bust Ted DiBiase open with punch (at least I saw it from a replay).
As for DiBiase, Jr.? Well, I am not sure. I really thought he would have broken out by now, but the crowd really was not into him. He was pretty simple in his offense, but when he worked with Rhodes he was clearly the better man. The jury is still out on DiBiase, Jr. right now.
Though my actual grade was average, I did watch it again and was real impressed with the awareness and instincts of Orton. Orton stole the show here and thanks to his work ethic in that contest my second grade was significantly higher than the actual grade.
Match #3 ? Money in the Bank Ladder Match (Christian, MVP, Evan Bourne, Jack Swagger, Kofi Kingston, Kane, Matt Hardy, Dolph Ziggler, Drew McIntyre, and Shelton Benjamin competed).
Potential Grade: B- (If you like high spots) or C (if you want to expect some wrestling)
Actual Grade: B-
Second Take Grade: C+
The match took 13:44 to complete. It ended when Jack Swagger hit Christian with the briefcase (Christian fell down the ladder after the hit). Swagger took a long time to unhook the case, but Swagger pulled off the upset.
If I could say one thing about this contest it would be this. WWE, eight is better than ten. It was pretty difficult to follow each superstar, but I tried my best here students.
I wrote notes of all the bumps, spots, and ladder shots they all took, and I came up with something for each of the ten superstars:
Kofi did a nice job most of the time with his surroundings on the ladder, but it was painful to see that he almost went through the ladder while leaping on Kane. His Trouble in Paradise off the ladder was great, but using the ladder as stilts was even better. However, I thought he “lost” here because not even six months ago he was feuding with some top guys on the RAW brand. Now he was a bit of an afterthought in this match.
MVP was in it. He punched and did nothing else. I wonder if any man fell off the face of the WWE quicker than MVP. He fell into the “lost” category because I fear that creative does not even know what to do with him.
Evan Bourne was in his first WrestleMania and I thought he was not bad. He had no shot at winning the match, but I think a strong showing my help him in the future. Though he somewhat overshot a knee senton on Jack Swagger early in the contest, Bourne gained some strides when he tried to climb up the side of the ladder. Also, I expected him to do a Shooting Star Press off the top of the ladder, but he did do a perfect off-balance SSP on Christian that was pretty solid. With that in mind, I gave Bourne a “pass”.
Jack Swagger obviously was the “real winner” here. Hey, he is already the NEW World Heavyweight Champion (sorry to spoil, but it is all out there right now). He used the ladder well in all his spots. He was around the action most of the contest and looked like a winner until it took him forever to win the case. I thought his work overall was a bit impressive and am happy he is off to better things now.
Shelton Benjamin did most of his offense on MVP. He hit Paydirt on MVP and also near the end of the match executed a Hurricanranna over the top rope to send MVP out of the ring. I am surprised the writing team did not give him more to work with. He has the talent obviously. He was GREAT last year, but this year he was a shadow of the likes last year. It hurts me to do this, but I think he “lost” out big here.
Matt Hardy surprised me in this match. Last year, he had a great program against Jeff Hardy that ended. This year, he used the ladder well when he sandwiched Swagger, hiptossed Bourne over a ladder, and took a sick bump by flipping on a ladder. He sold (or legit) hurt his back, yet STILL did the Twist of Fate on the ladder. Overall, we do rip on his conditioning but at WrestleMania he was a real “winner”.
Dolph Ziggler looked strong to start, but then became the resident bumper. He did the Zig Zag on Christian, even though it was sloppy but I did not count that because it was on a ladder. Outside of Christian, Ziggler really took a toll on his body. For that I am calling him a real “winner”. He had a couple moments out there.
Drew McIntyre, stay out of the ladder matches please? All I wrote for him was he took a couple bumps, pushed Kingston of a ladder, and his midsection met the ropes. He was really a non-factor in this contest. Given the push that he received this year, I found him a little lackluster in his WM debut. I think he “lost” a little bit here.
Kane was the only wrestler that targeted a move that went outside the ring. He chokeslammed Bourne over the top rope, which I thought was great. He was effective with the ladder. He also chokeslammed Ziggler while climbing the ladder. He always is there for brute power, and well mission accomplished this time. He may have no direction, but I think his performance led me to believe he “won” a little bit of stock this year.
Christian, what can I say about him? He took a few finishers, yet was in it until the end. He monkey flipped Kofi to the ladder, used a ladder to sandwich Swagger in the middle, was great generating offense on the ladder, and was probably the most aggressive. Christian “won” by losing I think. I don’t see him getting buried, but I don’t see him winning a World Title. In my opinion, that is serving a major injustice.
Well, after watching this a second time I noticed it was too spotty. I did not let that harm the grade because it had ten wrestlers and a few ladders. The match was done carefully, as we did not see those high-flying spots from the top of the ladder to the floor. We did not see anything that would be the clich?d “WrestleMania Moment”. However, I do give credit to WWE’s Creative team for surprising most of us by giving Swagger the opportunity to “cash in” the case to be the Champion that he is now.
I said most because VKingoftheWorldV in the predictions game ACTUALLY picked Jack Swagger to win the match!
Match #4: HHH vs. Sheamus
Potential Grade: B- (Leaned towards a C).
Actual Grade: B
Second Take Grade: B+
The match took 12:09 to complete. The match ended when Triple H pedigreed Sheamus and got the pinfall victory.
Before WrestleMania, I thought this match would be great. After watching this match twice since my potential grade, I was not disappointed. The match had a strong story to start. The pacing was great and the footwork was excellent all throughout the match.
Sheamus was a real winner here, even though he lost. For a guy who just debuted a few months ago, he went toe-to-toe with The King of Kings and almost shocked the world. Sheamus was wise beyond his years in that match and got the majority of control. Most of the time, HHH could not get time to breathe as Sheamus was all over him. I said he would be the dark horse last week, and I think it is safe to say that Sheamus will be just fine after his moral victory.
Triple H was a winner here as well. He got the reputation of burying guys when they hit their strides. Well, I think at this time in his career he must learn to slowly “pass the torch”. Sheamus reminds some of HHH from a skill standpoint. However, I noticed near the end of the match he rushed a few spots. I mean, he took a Pump Kick and then got right back up to hit the Pedigree. That was the only complaint I had. Overall, I thought this was the best match that won’t be talked about at the Faculty Lounge because Taker and Michaels had a match.
So, in conclusion I graded this pretty high. I think Sheamus will get the upper hand very soon on Triple H. Sheamus worked well and his gimmick is excellent. The finish was a bit rushed to my liking, but overall I was entertained from start to finish. Great work to both warriors!
Match #5: Rey Mysterio vs. CM Punk (w/Luke Gallows and Serena)
Potential Grade: B (could be B+)
Actual Grade: B-
Second Take Grade: B-
The match took 6:30 to complete. It ended when Rey Mysterio countered a sneak attack by the Straightedge Society. Mysterio finished off Punk with a 619 and a top rope splash.
Once again, a great story told here. Punk cut what I thought may be the best promo of 2010 when he freaked out Mysterio’s daughter on her birthday. You could honestly feel the intensity in Mysterio, which seemed lacking last year. Usually, I am not a fan of family in storylines. But this worked well for both superstars.
CM Punk was the real winner here. He went from an afterthought as a face to a blown-out heel. He is even Chris Jericho territory when it comes to cutting promos, but Punk upped that by cutting a promo right before the match! Furthermore, his kicks were stiff and efficient. Given the fact they only had under seven minutes to hit their stride, Punk was able to control the flow in the ring.
It was also a win Mysterio. He had some intensity that he sorely lacked recently. I found it refreshing and enjoyable.
If I could find some losers in this match, it would be two people. No, not Luke Gallows or Serena.
First would be Mysterio’s costume designer. Seriously…AVATAR???? Maybe next year he can have Shrek attire or something like that. Or better yet, if Finding Nemo does a sequel can you see that? Mysterio dressed as a fish with a bad wheel. Also, I know I am not the only one to type this but the creative team dropped the ball here. This match could have easily gone ten minutes, but it was way too short.
Still, it was a quick enjoyable match. It had more of a Smackdown feel than a PPV feel. I liked the quick start. Punk was very violent with Mysterio, especially drilling his face to the ring steps. Punk kept on Mysterio the whole time. Both showed great chemistry with each other, which is what to expect from a guy like Mysterio. Mysterio did mess up a small bit on the countered DDT. However other that, both men performed very well and never missed a beat. I look forward to the feud, as we all know it will continue.
Match #6: Bret Hart vs. Vince McMahon
Potential Grade: C- (for nostalgic purposes)
Actual Grade: C
Second Take Grade: C-
The match took 11:09 to complete. It ended when Bret Hart applied the Sharpshooter, which led Vince McMahon to tap easily.
I really don’t have much to say about this match. Wait, I do! It was the longest squash match in the history of pro wrestling. It felt like a video game in which you have no one controlling the second controller, except this was in real life.
So, who were the real winners you ask? Start with the Hart Dynasty. A couple weeks ago, many feared about their future. However, last Thursday Tyson Kidd was near perfect against Mysterio and now they did what many people wished they could do since WWE went “PG”. They dropped Vince on his head! I think The Hart Dynasty went from being in trouble to becoming the next tag team champions by year’s end. Bank on that happening.
Give Vince McMahon a victory here as well. This was the only way to end this years-long feud once and for all. McMahon took his beating like a man! Hart hit him with a crowbar nine times, and followed that up with EIGHTEEN CHAIRSHOTS!!! Sorry, but a mid-60s guy should not be taking bumps like this. Heck, I could not see main event guys take a beating like that.
To conclude, I thought it was what it was. I had a feeling that Vince would not get any offense in because Bret would not want to be humiliated. After all those years, the fans and talents involved got closure. It was a dream come true to some, the boss got taken out by the disgruntled worker. Still, it did not deserve a higher grade than a C-.
Match #7: Chris Jericho (c) vs. Edge
Potential Grade: B
Actual Grade: B
Second Take Grade: B
The match took 15:48 to complete. It ended when Jericho nailed Edge with the World Heavyweight Title, and then followed it up with a Codebreaker. Chris Jericho is STILL your World Heavyweight Champion (for 2 more days at least) After the match Edge speared him through the ring announcer’s area, one should know that the story will continue.
Since the Royal Rumble match, we knew this was going to happen. This was the happy ending for Edge, right? Well, again the WWE threw the number 2 (curveball sign in baseball lingo) and Jericho retained in what I thought was a pretty good contest. But one must wonder, did Edge come back too soon?
Chris Jericho did all he could to make this match solid. Edge was very limited due to the injury, and Jericho took notes on that. Jericho was very careful during the segment of their feud. He sold Edge’s offense well, and he delivered his moves well. I don’t think Jericho honestly had one bad moment out there. That is why he is “The Best in the World at what he does”.
I would not say Edge was a “loser” here. I applaud his efforts to come back from one of the most serious injuries in sports, the ruptured Achilles’ Tendon. Edge did take himself to the limit and that is all the fans could ask from him, as he looked in obvious pain after the match. But obviously, I think the viewers knew who was in total control in this contest.
Though I for one predicted a happy ending, I am glad it did not happen. Edge can now continue to chase without losing any steam from this feud. Now with what went on in an upcoming Smackdown, the chase for the title will be even better for both Jericho and Edge.
To conclude, I thought the match was very good. The in-ring psychology was excellent. Jericho, when in control, was on the top of his game. He was the one that controlled the pace of this contest. Jericho paced himself well, and his positioning was perfect. Edge is still recovering and offensively he was pretty average. Still, I for one give Edge a ton of credit for doing the best he could. The Spear through the ring announcer table was a nice touch and a great end to the story for now.
Match #8: Beth Phoenix, Mickie James, Eve Torres, Gail Kim, and Kelly Kelly vs. Maryse, Alicia Fox, Michelle McCool, Layla El, and Vickie “The Excuse Me Cougar” Guerrero.
Potential Grade: This was NOT on my previous column but when announced I gave it a D+ potential.
Actual Grade: D
Second Take Grade: D-
This match took 3:26 to complete. It ended when Vickie Guerrero did a Splash from the top rope, then immediately rammed Kelly Kelly a few times to get a pinfall victory.
Well, this is the first time I really need to think positive. So here we go. At least they kept Guerrero covered. At least some divas hit their finisher well. Well, that is all.
Obviously, I give the “real” win to Vickie Guerrero. She is an annoying cougar-beast and she plays it well. She is the most important character and she took advantage of McCool’s Faith Breaker to almost kill Kelly.
The losers in this contest, you ask? How about Women’s wrestling in the WWE? Once known for skills and beauty, some divas are performing poorly and gave fans a reason to have a smoke break or to drain the lizard. The wrong divas are getting promoted and over. Where was Tiffany? She would have at least continued a story for Smackdown at least. It is just sad and disappointing to see this from their creative team.
So, after the match they all get a piece of Vickie “Excuse Me Cougar” Guerrero. I guess that was something to go home about.
There I spent 202 words writing about the divas match. The match ended before you read this.
To conclude, I do feel bad for some of the women in this division. It could be strengthened, but obviously someone in the WWE does not care to push them even farther. Let’s move on.
Match #9: Batista (c) vs. John Cena
Potential Grade: B-
Actual Grade: B-
Second Take Grade: C
The match took 13:31 to complete. John Cena applied the STF on Batista and after a minute, Batista slowly tapped out. John Cena is your NEW WWE World Champion.
Again, this was a good story involving two superstars who started off their careers at about the same time. However, Cena was the one getting all the money deals while Batista felt cheated. We have seen this before, but I enjoyed the intensity before the match. I even enjoyed this bout the first time I watched it. Then when I watched it move for move, I was very disappointed.
The real winner here was John Cena. After Batista’s botched DDT (which Cena was in legit pain may I add), Cena did his best while shaking off the apparent injury. In slow-motion, it even looked like he shrunk an inch. He stood his ground during the match, and hit his moves (though in obvious pain) throughout the match.
Batista was the “real” loser here. He is not a guy that can counter quickly and the weakness was really exposed today. He was really sloppy in that ring and it was very sad to see that. He did not land his moves properly, and his chemistry with Cena was pretty nonexistent. I was expecting something decent and at first I thought I got it. But I give credit to Batista for stalling Cena with headlocks while Cena tried to shake off his injury.
Look, I liked the result of this. I felt bad that I graded it the way I did, honestly. I thought it had some strong moments. I was impressed with the finish. But it was hard to enjoy when one sees that Batista almost made this match a short one. So if I could say one thing about this match it would be that the story was excellent. However, the execution in the ring was less than stellar. If they want to work a program with these two again, they better be careful or their careers could end sooner than later.
Match #10: The Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels
Potential Grade: A-
Actual Grade: A-
Second Take Grade: A (but nearly perfect)
The match took 23:23 to complete. It ended when The Undertaker said “STAY DOWN”! Michaels got up, taunted The Undertaker, and slapped him hard. The Undertaker responded with a elevated Tombstone Piledriver, ending Shawn Michaels career per stipulation.
Before I go on, I must say that I did my best to not compare this to last year’s Match of the Year. That is just an epic match that will only happen once in a LONG time. So with that in mind, I thought this is the front runner for 2010 Match of the Year (can I nominate that match, Hunter Golden?).
I will type out what I wrote in my notebook for this match. All I will say is that The Undertaker, Shawn Michaels, WWE Universe watching at home, Jose Marrero and the rest of the 70,000 plus watching this in Arizona, and EVERYONE who enjoyed Shawn Michaels throughout his career. This is a match that can easily be in someone’s top five of all time.
My notes: The intro was superb. The face off was just adding to this legendary story. Both started swinging very strong. I love when Undertaker does the simple Old School move. HBK fought for his life, as this truly would kill him if he lost this match. Both controlled the match very well to start. The brawling in the corner by both was equally impressive. HBK was great in all aspects. He showed power in the chops, execution with the Figure Four, and his Moonsault was a bit off but who really cared? The man did a Moonsault to a table in his 40s! Let’s see your parents try and do that at that age. So many finishers, but I did not care. One wanted to finish a career, while one wanted to end a streak.
As you could see, the suspense was killing me the moment they exchanged finishers.
WOW! HBK slapped him hard. Taker showed remorse, but after that he wanted to end it once and for all. What a Tombstone to end one of the best careers of Professional Wrestling!
The only downfall was too many finishers I guess. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that it was a test of power and will. Last Sunday, WWE wrote that Taker’s Streak stays and Michaels gets a heck of an exit. Don’t cry for Michaels, as he has a lot of good things to look forward to with his church and his family.
Will Michaels ever wrestle again? I will go more into that on The Teacher’s Lounge, but to be brief I say this is the last time we will see him wrestle. And before Internet geeks say this…
HE WILL NOT GO TO TNA!!!!
Michaels does not need the money or the fame. I can see him being content with a six-figure salary as a WWE Ambassador.
Ok, so that is how I will end running down the card.
So, what was my “Grade” For this year’s WrestleMania?
For WrestleMania 25: I graded it a C. Further explanation appeared on my 9th column in which you can check the archives on WrestleView.com.
My Potential WM XXVI Grade: C+ (2.5 QPA out of 4.0).
My ACTUAL Grade for WM XXVI: Towards C+ (2.4 QPA out of 4.0)
My Second Take Grade for WM XXVI: C+ (2.45 QPA out of 4.0)
If I could think of one word to sum up WrestleMania it would be “Conservative”. Sure, we got great moments, but it seemed that the wrestlers for the most part were being very careful with their bodies. We got a few moments, but not as much as year’s past.
I am not saying it was a bad show. I for one thought it was an overall “B- or 7.5 out of 10” PPV. However, the Divas’ Match weighed the grade down a little bit. Also, the commentary of Striker and Cole were disastrous. As Mr. V the reporter, I found it to be above average. As a wrestling fan, I was not disappointed that I shelled out my share of money to watch this show twice.
Will Mr. V buy the DVD when it comes out? ABSOLUTELY!!
SMACKDOWN SPOILS (because we all heard about it)…
Jack Swagger…YOUR NEW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION!!
I will add more to that next week. But I will be the first to say I am happy about this. It is time to generate some young blood. Jack Swagger has the potential, but is he the face of the WWE right now? Only time will tell. All I will say is right now, I dig this.
There were many that deserve to be on this list, but I narrowed it down the best I could. Here are those that deserved it and who deserved the Dunce Cap of Doom!
Matt Striker ? Again, this is NOT an April Fools’ Joke! I have been a fan of his work since he debuted on ECW a couple years ago. But WrestleMania, Matt???? Out of all the days to go all clich? on me, it had to be at WrestleMania?????
Tony Atlas ? For laughing at me while I said that ROH was “good” in the debut episode of The Teacher’s Lounge.
Vickie Guerrero ? For wearing a Cougar Necklace and for all the “Excuse Me” attire. No wonder why many don’t take that division seriously anymore.
Anyone over the age of 25 that did a WWE Ring Entrance at Axxess and got caught on camera doing it ? That was kind of embarrassing.
Bubba the Love Sponge ? I would rather Brian Knobs over you at this point. I guess having your head up Hogan’s butt is a good thing, huh?
WWE Creative ? For putting Vickie Guerrero over at WrestleMania.
To that dude in the front row at WrestleMania wearing a purple-colored T-Shirt ? Look, I know what some might say “Let them have fun”. If it was a kid or a teenager, I would let it go. But guys that are “grown men” acting like kids? That was unreal. My WM Moment? Making fun of that guy. He had the blondish hair parted sideways, I think many know who I am talking about.
HDNet ? Why did you take ROH off your waves for this College Invitational Tournament? I may get rusty the next time I do a recap for their show. Seriously, SOMEONE needs to SLAP THE POIPOSE now and then, huh?
Fans that STILL do the “one finger salute” in front of kids ? I don’t need to go over this again. Off cameras, go for it. On camera, it just looks bad.
Ted DiBiase Jr. ? Don’t push your father like like a spoiled brat. I do this as a joke, but I am a Million Dollar Man mark.
Chelsea ? for trying to lure The Pope D’Angelo Dinero into a trap.
ETS and the Praxis Series ? I still can’t stand this scam.
Michael Cole ? The students wanted you on here for the way you acted on NXT the past couple weeks. YOU sir are NO Bobby Hennan.
Orlando Jordan ? or did TNA have RuPaul as a guest host for Impact?
People that can’t spell on their posters ? The Hitman’s first name is “Bret”, not “Brett”. Go on Wikipedia, children.
The man that posted the sign “Vince Fears Dixie” ? Really? Vince should be scared? Look, I have enjoyed Impact recently, but when they can get a 1.0 rating again maybe Vince will “shiver”. Thanks to Robert Downing for that nomination
DUNCE CAP OF DOOM GOES TO….Kate Gosselin! She had the nerve to say that “She is not a diva”. She goes on tantrums on television, exposes her children for monetary gain, and hairstyles that make me want to puke (kind of like that backward mullet a few months ago). Why am I talking about this prima donna? Well, She ruined my favorite guilty pleasure, Dancing with the Stars. I boycott the show until she is voted off. I am tired of reading headlines about her on the web. She gives mothers out there a bad name in my opinion. Where is she when those eight kids are around? This will be the last time she will ever grace my column and for that I hope I can find a Dunce Cap big enough for that head of yours.
Previous People of “The Doom”: Bubba the Love Sponge, Hulk Hogan, Ric Flair, and Michael Cole
Something bother you in the wrestling world? Put them in detention by e-mailing me at email@example.com.
Mr. V’s Honor Roll for the week of March 22 ? March 28, 2010
Here was Mr. V’s schedule in regards to grading these matches.
3/22 – Graded WWE Monday Night Raw and TNA Impact matches
3/23 – Graded WWE NXT Matches
3/24 – Column Writing. After that, I watched ROH on YouTube and recap the show.
3/25 – Graded WWE Superstars.
3/26 – Graded Smackdown Matches
3/27 – OFF DAY
3/28 – Graded FCW Matches (If I ever find a stream for it). It not, it is an OFF DAY.
As of now, I may not even grade FCW contests. I am having a hard time finding any links for the show. However when I get them, I will post them.
I did not grade any ROH on HDNet matches this week. The reason is because of the already-mentioned CBI and CollegeInsider.com basketball tournaments. I will be back to recapping and grading ROH in 2 weeks.
Well, wrestling this week was pretty light due in part to the lack of Ring of Honor and WrestleMania. TNA had an opportunity to crack the honor roll and I think they made a strong case with their main event from 3/22. So, Who got the top honor this week. Well, it may surprise, but I think it was deserved.
Distinguished Honors ? Rey Mysterio vs. Tyson Kidd, WWE Superstars, March 24.
Winner: Rey Mysterio thanks to the 619/Top Rope Splash Combination
Overall: I have to state this perfectly clear. Tyson Kidd is a GREAT wrestler. And Mysterio helped Kidd showcase all his strengths. Kidd controlled the majority of the match. Kidd consistently grounded Mysterio with a series of locks and holds. Kidd actually showcased some power as well, as he was impressive with the Pumphandle Gutbuster move during the middle of the contest. Kidd also showed his high-flying skills as well, including a Springboard Elbow Drop and before that a top corner Blockbuster. If not for a mistake (the double springboard moonsault, which is difficult for WWE standards), He wrestled a perfect match on Thursday.
I give Mysterio credit as well. He needed the win for some motivation in his upcoming match with Punk at WrestleMania. And though Kidd generated a TON of offense, Mysterio was still able to counter well when needed. He was pretty much flying around the place, but it paid off when he hit the finishing moves.
Only if these guys were six inches taller and forty pounds heavier, then this would have been a main event on a Pay Per View. Pound for Pound, they are two of the best wrestlers in the world today.
High Honors ? Jeff Hardy and Rob Van Dam vs. Beer Money Inc., TNA Impact, March 22.
Winner: Hardy and Van Dam won thanks to an amazing combination of the Rolling Thunder (RVD), Swanton Bomb (Jeff), and 5-Star Frog Splash (RVD).
Overall: I was worried at the start when it got spotty for both teams, but I was pleasantly surprised with how well paced this contest was.
Though they are not feuding at the moment, the match told a good story. Beer Money were really strong around the middle of the contest and still did not miss a beat with all the offense they generated on Jeff Hardy. Robert Roode’s offense was very crisp throughout the match, especially the Spinebuster. It was perfectly done. Storm showed flashes of being technical. As a team, their combination moves were done to perfection. I was pleased with their efforts. To conclude, I am glad that they are getting some TV time, I was a bit worried for Beer Money (one of my favorite tag teams).
I was very surprised of how well Van Dam and Hardy worked as a team. Honestly, this is a dream team to me. Both have almost the same style of wrestling (RVD is still a bit better in my opinion). They had flurries of offense, but keep in mind they sold what Beer Money dished out, especially Jeff Hardy. The more I see them, the more I want to see them. They seem to have a lot of fun as a team. In the end, Eric Young formed an agreement with them and to me that was a great thing to see. I am happy to see Eric Young elevated. He was great as a leader for World Elite until their abrupt demise in January.
So, TNA thought your ratings don’t show it you had a great Main Event show last week. It had a nice pace and the spots were not overbearing. The action was pretty even and the finish was superb.
Honors ? John Morrison vs. The Miz, Monday Night Raw, March 22.
Winner: John Morrison hit a perfect Star Ship Pain to get the pinfall victory over his former tag team partner.
Grade: B (leaned toward B-).
Overall: I thought the tug-o-war between these two teams were pretty good. Too bad they did not really execute this during their contest for WrestleMania XXVI.
The Miz was playing his role very well. He is arrogant and full of himself. One either loves him or hates him. But his in-ring psychology is by far one of the best in professional wrestling. He worked Morrison back pretty well for it being a real short contest.
Morrison was very efficient with his high-risk abilities. He hit all those moves clean and attacked from the corner very well. He was able to counter some of The Miz’s offense, and that was a good thing leading up to WrestleMania.
Overall, both men showed great chemistry. I actually looked forward to their tag team match, but sadly it was quicker than that Diva’s match we all suffered through.
Mister V’s Grade Book from this past week
A+; A; A-: None to report.
B+: Rey Mysterio vs. Tyson Kidd (Superstars).
B: John Morrison vs. The Miz (RAW); Jeff Hardy and Rob Van Dam vs. Robert Roode and James Storm (TNA); and Kane, Dolph Ziggler, Matt Hardy, Shelton Benjamin, and Drew McIntyre vs. Christian, MVP, Jack Swagger, Evan Bourne, and Kofi Kingston (Smackdown).
B-: None to report.
C+: Sheamus, Ted DiBiase, Jr., and Cody Rhodes vs. Triple H and Randy Orton (RAW); Shawn Michaels vs. Kane (RAW); Lacey Von Erich, Velvet Sky, Madison Rayne, and Daffney vs. Tara, Angelina Love, Sarita, and Taylor Wilde (TNA); Jeff Jarrett vs. Mick Foley (TNA); Heath Slater and Justin Gabriel vs. Skip Sheffield and Wade Barrett (NXT); and Darren Young and David Otunga vs. Daniel Bryan and Michael Tarver (NXT).
C: Kofi Kingston vs. Vladimir Kozlov (RAW) and Matt Morgan vs. Hernandez (TNA).
C-: CM Punk vs. JTG (Superstars) and R-Truth vs. The Big Show (Smackdown).
D+; D; D-: Vickie Guerrero, Alicia Fox, Michelle McCool, Layla, and Maryse vs. Beth Phoenix (Smackdown).
F or INC: Maryse, Layla, and Michelle McCool vs. Beth Phoenix, Gail Kim, and Eve Torres (RAW) and Rob Terry vs. Tomko (TNA).
Commentator Report Card
I will not have you all read through my comments on this part for yet another week. Why? Because it is too long to type and there is going to be a nice stretch of weather over here.
BONUS: PREDICTIONS FROM THE FACULTY STANDINGS
**As of WrestleMania XXVI** (Our WM record in parentheses or question marks)
1) Daniel Browne (For Queen and Country)……………………………..19-11 (6-4)
2) David Stephens (That’s a Wrap and RAW Recapper)………….18-12 (5-5)
3) Josh Boutwell (Viva La Raza and TNA Recapper)……………….18-12 (6-4)
4) Students of the Week (The Best from Prev. PPV)………………17-13 (5-5)*
5) Matt O’Brien (Notes From The Nosebleeds)…………………………17-13 (6-4)
6) WrestleView Students (The Loyal Readers)………………………..16-14 (5-5)
7) Jose Marrero (Wrestling Rumblings)……………………………………16-14 (6-4)
8) Joe Baiamonte (Baiamonte’s Casa/2009 WV Champ)………16-14 (6-4)
9) Sean Hurley (The Sharpshooter)………………………………………..15-15 (4-6)
10) Mike Tedesco (Smackdown and NXT Recapper)…………………14-16 (5-5)
11) Anthony Valvo (From the Desk of Mr. V/ROH Recaps)……….14-16 (5-5)
12) Doug Lackey (Reality From Ringside)………………………………….13-17 (4-6)
13) Jeff Springer (WWE Superstars Recapper)……………………………12-6 (7-3)
There were three students of the week last week, none of the them retained.
Among the Faculty, Jeff Springer posted the best, with a 7-3 record for WrestleMania.
Out of the Students, John Leo Algo (to some known as SUPERSTARZZ) went 8-2 on the WM Card and is the New Student of the Week for TNA’s Lockdown picks. The three students of the week from last Sunday did not retain. Two of them went 6-4, while one went 4-6.
Overall, we had 22 “WV Students”. They averaged a win total of 4.5. Since I estimate the student’s picks, I had them marked as 5-5.
Past Students of the Week: Evan O’Brien, TJ Patton, Ricky Langston, Craig Alan Cope, and Paul Lyons.
Mr. V’s Gold Star Segment
Sponsored by: JR’s Family Bar-B-Q. I won’t plug his merchandise this week because I know my students already sampled his wonderful sauces and beef jerky. So I will say check out his blog in regards to Shawn Michaels. It is a great read!
Well, there are going to be a LOT of Gold Stars to hand out. Let’s get started!
Shawn Michaels ? Look, I will be honest that I was not a real big HBK fan growing up. However, there is no question that he was a huge part of the WWE’s success over the past two decades. If Sunday was his last match, Thank You Shawn Michaels for your dedication and your heart. Bad people can change to good ones, and I salute you for being a good man.
The Undertaker ? NOW 18-0 at WrestleMania. No one will ever touch “The Streak”.
Bill Simmons ? The one of three ESPN columnists that I enjoy wrote a nice piece on WrestleMania in his blog.
Jerry Lawler ? For being the “best” commentator among the three at WrestleMania.
John Cena ? For winning the WWE Championship against Batista.
Chris Jericho ? Retaining the World Heavyweight Championship at WrestleMania.
Jack Swagger (2) ? For earning the briefcase in the Money in the Bank Ladder Match, then two days later cashing it in against Chris Jericho to be the NEW World Heavyweight Championship.
Chris Jericho ? Remember when he said last year that “WWE needs young talent”. Actions speak louder than words, and we can bash Jericho all we want but he was pretty honest this time.
Big Show and The Miz ? STILL your WWE Unified Tag Team Champions after WrestleMania!
TNA Wrestling ? For letting go of Consequences Creed and The Nasty Boys.
Josh Piedra ? My best to you my friend. I will to you the leadership in bringing back Ecto Cooler to the markets. We cannot give up on our dream!!
David Stephens ? For busting his butt to getting our first episode of The Teachers’ Lounge up for WrestleView.com. Honestly, I could not work with a better person on this project than Mr. Monday Night Raw for WrestleView.
Jeff Springer ? Our new Superstars Recapper posted the best PPV record among the WV Faculty. He posted a solid 7-3 record for WrestleMania.
SUPERSTARZZ ? For being the best student among the WrestleView Students with an impressive 8-2 mark for the PPV. He has accepted the invitation to join our next set of predictions, which will be for TNA Lockdown.
To the WV Students that participated ? We got over 20 different sets of PPV picks, and I thank each one of you.
Ricky Langston, Paul Lyons, and Craig Alan Cope ? Thank you all for being the Students of the Week last weekend.
Daniel R. Brown ? STILL your Dean of WrestleView for the 2010-2011 season.
Diva-Dirt.com ? I know a couple of the staffers on that site and let me tell you, if you want to read some honest opinions on Women’s Professional Wrestling look no further.
Jose Marrero ? He will always be known as the first guest of The Teacher’s Lounge! He was terrific and be rest assured we will get him back in the future. Thank you, Jose.
Eric Young ? Yes, I will throw in a TNA name here. Young has opened some eyes recently with an elbow drop from the newly structured four sides of steel. I seriously see promise in EY now and I hope for the best.
Ezekiel Jackson ? My condolences go to your family.
Norway ? For having a sign that said “Norway Hates Cena” at WrestleMania
That Sign Person ? Whoever put out the sign that said “Batista likes Fishsticks”, you got the best sign of WrestleMania last weekend! I hope that is on the WrestleMania DVD because it is one of the best signs I have ever seen.
USAF Honor Guard Drill Team ? What an impressive performance before Cena’s introduction.
March for Babies Drive ? Last week, I posted in my column regarding this noble cause. Well, I was informed by Jose that the family is very close to reaching their goal. If you donated, we thank you.
Pittsburgh Police Officers ? You will always be in this columnist’s thoughts and prayers.
Dropkick Murphys ? Because they remind me that baseball is around the corner.
Sheamus ? For proving to the world that Mr. V can be right sometimes. He truly was the dark horse guys at WrestleMania.
Daniel Bryan ? He is the #1 ranked NXT superstar. Though winless still, he worked well no matter what Cole is scripted/unscripted to say.
Hart Dynasty ? Congrats on finally being allowed some TV exposure.
Duke, West Virginia, Butler, and Michigan State ? The Men’s Final Four for March Madness. Hey, my bracket is not totally busted yet.
UConn, Stanford, Baylor, and Oklahoma ? The Women’s Final Four teams! Hey, I do have ladies that read my column. Besides, we all know who is going to win this tournament at least. Don’t let me down, Lady Huskies!
World Cup ? I am starting to have Soccer, or Football, Fever right now!
Well, Mr. V thought that the Good Idea, Bad Idea column was great. But since I did not get any ideas this week I have a few NEW assignments for my loyal students. So, here are the assignments. Since you all have Easter Vacation or Spring Break the assignment will be due next week. I expect at least seven responses.
1) Tell me your grade for WrestleMania XXVI? Provide some thoughts. It does not have to be long, but you can add whatever you want after you post a grade. If you want them posted on Mr. V #63, please keep it PG. I know you are all tired of PG stuff but I keep profanity in my columns to almost zero. Inappropriate comments will either be deleted or sent to detention. DON’T BE IN DETENTION!
2) Dave Stephens and I started up a new show on The WrestleView Radio Network and we need your assistance once again. If you have a question regarding wrestling, sports, music, or even Orlando Jordan’s expose send those questions to the Professors at firstname.lastname@example.org. Yes, we DID get that e-mail!
I thank you in advance. I always want to make this a “student-friendly” column and am looking for fresh ideas in the future. I credit my success to all of you and thank for you participating in the past.
Well, that does it for me this week. I thank you all for reading and I hope you enjoyed this column as much as I typed it out. If you want to get a hold of me during the week, please e-mail me at email@example.com or by leaving me a message on Facebook. I did respond to all your e-mails this week and I was happy to do so since I got this upgrade on my computer.
Now, students you are allowed to leave the classroom. Please push in your chairs, line up straight, and exit to the closest door around you. Until, well my next Mr. V column you are all……DISMISSED!
**off character** Wow, really? No ROH Recap and No Predictions?
Mr. V does read e-mail, so drop the teacher a line: firstname.lastname@example.org.
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Check out my recent Examiner articles! Heck, you can even subscribe to my articles! Help me earn a little bit more cash by just going to the link, please. I have been updating my page each week with recaps and if it continues to be successful, who knows what I will do.
THE TEACHER’S LOUNGE IS NOW PLAYING ON SATURDAYS!!
David Stephens (That’s A Wrap and Raw recapper) and I have a new show only on the WVRN. It does cost a bit of money, but we will do our best to make it worth it. If you want to be a part of the Lounge for our “E-mails” section, you may drop us a line at email@example.com.
For $4.99 you can listen to the likes of Hunter Golden, Adam Martin, Tom Van Stone, Doug Lackey, and so much more!! I will be honest to say that we do offer the best value in paid content. So for a couple bucks less than a bag of Dunkin’ Donuts Coffee, you can get all of the above.
Finally to end this column, I would like to thank those who read all of my work. My ROH Recaps are still among the most viewed and my Examiner page is among the top 5 among all examiners in the Pittsburgh Area. This is the most motivated I have been in writing in some time, so thanks to all of you.
If not for the students, there would be no Mr. V. Thanks for reading my column.