“Yes, sir, we promised you a great main event…” The WWE video leads us into the show.
The NXT video plays and we’re brought into the arena. Michael Cole and Josh Mathews welcome us to the show.
EXCUSE ME! Vickie Guerrero comes out to the stage with her rookie Kaitlyn. Michael Cole almost wet himself in excitement. He calls her the Billie Jean King of NXT. She says her rookie embarrassed her last week so she invited someone to the show this week to make her proud. She’s getting massive heat tonight. It’s the Intercontinental Champion, her boyfriend, Dolph Ziggler. Michael Cole says this is some class brought to this “silly show”. I have to agree… that it’s a silly show.
As Dolph Ziggler and Kaitlyn go to the ring they show the end of last week’s NXT. Vickie wanted Kaitlyn to redo her speech at the end of AJ’s match. Vickie wanted Kaitlyn to attack her but it got turned and Vickie wound up on her butt.
Dolph Ziggler & Kaitlyn vs. Primo & AJ (1-0)
Ziggler starts it out against Primo. They lock up and Ziggler punches him. Primo responds with a dropkick. Ziggler tags in Kaitlyn so AJ comes in as well. AJ gets a waist lock and turns it into a roll up for a two count. AJ gets a headlock but Kaitlyn gets out. Kaitlyn takes her down with a shoulder block and steps on her. AJ recovers and kicks her down. AJ punches away and hits a running cross-body for a one count. Kaitlyn gets up and beheads her with a clothesline.
Ziggler tags himself in and takes Primo out before he can get in. Ziggler looks at AJ and intimidates her. Ziggler won’t let her get by him so she forearms him a few times, taking him down. Primo springboards in the ring with an axe handle and hits a running back elbow. Primo hits a nice dropkick and punches him in the corner. Ziggler reverses a whip but Primo immediately recovers with a clothesline. Primo sweeps the legs for a near fall. Primo misses a splash in the corner and takes the Zig-Zag. Ziggler picks up the easy win from there.
Winners by Pinfall: Dolph Ziggler & Kaitlyn (1-0)
Match Rating: 3/4 *
Kaitlyn runs into the ring and hugs Ziggler. Vickie Guerrero stands at ringside not looking too happy. She walks up the ramp slowly.
A video plays to promote Maxine. She’s Spanish, Cuban, Italian, Hawaiian, and Chinese. That’s a smorgasbord of nationalities.
We’ll have a Joke Off next. Are they going to recap this season up to this point?
Matt Striker is in the ring with AJ and Kaitlyn. He then welcomes the rest of the rookie Divas to the ring. This is our first rookie challenge of the evening. Good lord I don’t know if I can continue to recap two challenges a week. They have to tell a joke to the audience. Want to hear a joke? The WWE Diva Division! Hilarious, I know!
AJ tells a joke that sucked about blondes and potatoes. Aksana told a joke in Lithuanian. Jamie tells a Knock-Knock joke that I didn’t care for. Naomi is up and she got the crowd fired up. She’s the winner of season three. Just eliminate the next few months. Her joke sucked but still… she’s the winner! Maxine didn’t tell a joke but gave AJ $20 to get Girl Scout cookies. They fight and Matt Striker breaks it up. Kaitlyn tells a joke to AJ and AJ fights her. Jamie won the joke contest.
Michael Cole bangs on a gong at ringside. What the…?! Cole says all the divas, Matt Striker, and the crowd should be gonged. Everyone but him and Mathews should be gonged, especially this show. Apparently Cole hates this show as much as I do. At least he’s getting paid well to watch it!
Jamie vs. Aksana (0-1)
They lock up and Jamie works the arm. Jamie gets a hammerlock and Aksana reverses it. Aksana gets a headlock and Jamie pushes her off. Aksana hits a shoulder block and a body slam. Aksana misses an elbow drop and Jamie puts her in a hammerlock. Jamie takes her down with an arm bar but Aksana gets to the ropes. They push and pull hair. Aksana throws her off and hits some clotheslines. Aksana forearms her and sends her to the corner. Aksana misses a splash and gets rolled up. I’m sorry but this was horrible.
Winner by Pinfall: Jamie (1-0)
Match Rating: PATHETIC
A video for Naomi plays. She’s the best diva in the competition but I’ve said that already. Here’s your next breakout star.
A TREMENDOUS video package highlights the Undertaker vs. Kane feud through the years. This is the best thing on NXT so far tonight.
Dolph Ziggler is backstage and he’s talking to Kaitlyn about her win. Vickie comes up and asks Kaitlyn to leave. Vickie asks what Ziggler was talking to her about. Vickie says he was all over her. Ziggler says nothing was going on. Vickie warns him that if he’s not careful he’ll lose her and she did a pretty funny gyration.
The obstacle course challenge is next. Kill me.
Does anyone care if I actually recap this? Vickie went first and fell before finishing. She flipped out. That’s pretty much the only thing of note. Overall it was crap so I’ll just save you the time you could spend reading this. Kaitlyn won.
After the obstacle course was finished Michael Cole got up from the announcer’s table and banged the gong. Cole grabbed a microphone and said this whole show is ridiculous. This whole show violates his journalistic integrity. Amen, brother. Cole says he was a war correspondent and now he’s covering this. Cole’s done with this entire show and he walks off. My sentiments exactly.
Quick Match Results
Dolph Ziggler & Kaitlyn (1-0) def. Primo & AJ (1-1)
Jamie (1-0) def. Aksana (0-2)
Bump of the Night: The only bump was to my sanity
Match of the Night: The mixed tag 3/4 *
For once Michael Cole and I are in total agreement. This show is a total joke. I can’t believe I’m going to say this but I’m going to miss Michael Cole on this show. The fact that Cole said all that stuff, though, leads you to believe that WWE is admitting that this show, and the NXT concept for that matter, is a complete failure. I’m 99.9% certain this season will be the last we’ll see of NXT. After that it’ll be filed alongside Katie Vick, the XFL, and the WBF in the Epic Fail section of WWE Headquarters.
Speaking of epic fail…
That match between Jamie and Aksana tonight was absolutely pathetic. How WWE could be comfortable with putting those two in the ring together is beyond me. I’ve attended some shows at some wrestling schools in the area and this is what I would expect to see from guys who have had three to four months of training. That kind of match flies at a wrestling school but not in WWE. Those two have no business wrestling on television at this point. They moved like robots in the ring. Oh wait, I forgot it’s the women that were wrestling. WWE doesn’t give a crap about them! How silly of me!
I remember a time when WWE used to have pride in what they put out. With all the shows they have to produce a week it seems like they just don’t care anymore. They have six hours of television to produce and try to make entertaining. It seems like their writers and producers are worn thin if this NXT episode is the best they can do. I think it’s time to go back to the two shows a week format with one show for the undercard talent.
Final Rating: No stars
E-Mail – MikeyT817@hotmail.com
Be sure to check out Friday’s Smackdown recap.
Thanks for reading!